Why do we Criticize, Condemn or Complain about others?
Why do you criticize others, why would you scold others. Is it because they will change themselves and start doing things properly.
Never, most people don't like being criticized. Do you like being criticized by others? I think no, right?
Then how can you change others by criticizing them? Ok let's say that you don't want to change anyone in the world, you just harshly scold him because of anger.
What can we get from that? Nothing... Nothing Nothing Nothing. You just made a bad relationship with them.
I get this content from "How to Win Friends & Influence People". This is a great book that I recommend you to read at least one time.
"If you have an intense desire and a keen determination to increase your ability to deal with people, this is just the book for you"
John Wanamaker once said, "I learned thirty years ago that it is foolish to scold. I have enough trouble overcoming my own limitations without fretting over the fact that God has not seen fit to distribute evenly the gift of intelligence"
People don't criticize themselves for anything, no matter how wrong it may be. Criticism is futile.
An animal rewarded for good behaviour will learn much more rapidly than other animals. Later studies have shown that the same applies to humans.
Instead of complaining about others, understand why they do that. Think from their side, what will do if we are there.
One of the favourite quotations of Abraham Lincoln's is
"Judge not, that ye be not judged"
When Mrs Lincoln and others spoke harshly of southern people, Lincoln replied, "Don't criticize them; they are just what we would be under similar circumstances"
He almost never criticized anybody for anything. Any fools can criticize, condemn and complain and most fools do. But it takes great character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.
Bob Hoover, a famous pilot and performer in air shows return to his home from air show. At three hundred feet in the air, both engines suddenly stopped. But he managed to land the plane, but the plane was badly damaged although nobody get hurt.
Hoover's first act after the emergency landing was to inspect plane fuel. As he guessed World War II propeller plane had been fueled with jet fuel rather than gasoline.
After that, he asked to see the mechanic
who had services on his plane? The young mechanic was sick in the grief of his mistake. Tears flowed down as Hoover approached. He not only caused damage to an expensive plane and also almost killed three people lives.
What will you do to a person who almost killed you and cost so much damage to your plane? Can you imagine Hoover's anger? Most of them strip him from his job and beat the shit out of them.
But Hoover didn't scold him and he didn't even criticize him. He put his arm around that mechanic shoulder and said, “To show you I’m sure that you’ll never do this again, I
want you to service my F-51 tomorrow.”
As Dr Johnson said: “God Himself, sir, does not propose to judge a man until the end of his days.”
These Contents are gathered from "How to win friends and influence people" Book. Most recommended book if you want to build a better relationship with people.
...and you will also help the author collect more tips.
We are human beings. Our way of living in an environment where there are others, who, perhaps, have a greater power of development, makes us envious! And we start to find mistakes and look for negative reasons about their way of life! Nice to meet you Kannan!