I, Me and Myself… Scare them else, my doorstep will be flooded…

I was scanning read.cash and found an article My Friends Left Me by @yoieuqudniram, inspired by an @ARTicLEE article. Oh! Quite an interesting read for me because I just had an argument with my sister labelling me “no friends”. Lolz. Quite unravelling it is...

MALDITA, SNABERA. Don’t like it? Sorry. It’s been like this ever since, so please get used to it. Hahaha! And besides, I assure you I am reasonable with the “Maldita” thing.

We had an argument because our eldest says “I have been like this forever and never listens, doesn’t accept faults” that’s why her friends asked her who I am quarreling at FB because I was so maldita. Our parents’ friends, who happens to be my friends too, was complaining I was quarreling someone on FB! AGAIN! Like she was screaming in my ear! She added a line, “God took your only best friend”. Hahaha!

I ended the argument telling her that I really don’t have to tell the world I have friends. Have friends who told me they’d come to visit me (from Mindanao to Cebu) because they missed me, cried when I told them of my heart disease, sent me a grocery funds when I told her I left my wallet at home and no more fare to take a ride back home, lolz…  My answer to her line was, “oh no! she wasn’t a friend. She was a sister from another mother, -she said!”. It was her declaration.

I am confrontational because I don’t like things to hang around on prolonged terms. I am less tolerant when it comes to this. It’s like I want the problem solved, immediately please! Like, now nah! I love tranquility and solace, anything that disturbs these, is confusing to me. So, it short-circuits me. Ok! It’s an agony for me to let it re-occur over a period of time – a week is already too long! So much more a month or year! It’s crazy! And after this, I’m good. Deadma, which is where the SNABERA comes in.

You’ll find me direct and straightforward when it comes to problems but when it comes to perspectives, I’m usually reserved. For one reason, FREEWILL. And oh! I am not the kind of person who just seats around and look at my friend being abused or bullied in anyway. I don’t have the heart to let it be! If I had to bring hell now, then be it. This was why I was so MALDITA on my FB page, on several occasion! LOLZ.

Though, I am very simple and don’t have trust issues even if my online life was being hacked by stalker… from my email down to reading my messages on messenger. It’s not that I trust people with my life but really its more of, I really have nothing to hide and you have nothing to use against me! Should you deem it to be! So, I really don’t mind. I have pictures but those were the times when I still want to preserve the memories of my growing kids, now they opted more of private life than exposed which is reasonable too!

I honestly don’t have visitors at home, my current home because… Oh no! I’m still in a mess physically and is still navigating my way… So please excuse me for now, I will get hold of all these and open my doors which will be very horrific because… OMG. They will surely flood my doorstep. For now, I am still hiding because I couldn’t tell them not to come and visit me. I simply don’t have the heart. Surely, they’re all just waiting for an invitation to come but physically I am not yet ready. Though, it’s been a decade but it’s only been 2 years since I got on our own. So…

Severing ties? Sure. As the bible says, “wolves dressed in sheeps”, surely there are a lot. I am not short in forgiveness but there are simply actions that cannot be taken for granted especially when safety is on the line.

Hmm! Though, I seldom like a person, but I don’t really care of stature. Just be real and that’s all you need to be! I never like discrimination because I am a victim of it and labelling as well. I’m sorry, accept me or rue me. I wasn’t born to embrace the world and be molded on their rules. I don’t care if I am poor at least I don’t live by the world’s dictates.

Bunso say’s, my “puryagaba face” is really scary! They both call me a witch, more like the maleficent type… Hahaha! It has it’s purpose darling! And that is scary because it was meant to be scary! But once you know me, it will be hard for you to let me go! Which is why I am scaring people away, else… My doorstep will really be flooded! Aw! Hahaha!

Now really. Friends, family or relatives or anyone shouldn't be dictating you of your preference and change/mold you to become that suited their taste! You have to be yourself because at the end of the day, you will be the one dealing with all those problems/predicaments in YOUR LIFE and not them. Let them live their lives because they have their own to feast on and should be busy with that, and mind their own business. Thank u and sorry for a long reading. God bless.

for a part II?... yup!

November 30, 2022
Image: Pinterest