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A birthday letter to my father

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Avatar for Jelena
Written by   225
3 months ago

July 1, 2022

Dad,

You know I can't start with "dear" dad, because you didn't teach me to be sweet-talking. “Dear” is such a small word to convey how dear you are to me. That is why I started with a simple “dad”.

I miss that word - dad. I lost the opportunity to say it and I didn't know that some opportunities we lose forever. But I would be the happiest if I could say "dad" again and then hear your voice. Many times during the day I imagine this and always find silence. How much does silence hurt? I wish I had never found out.

Do you remember how much I cried when Lucia suddenly died in my favorite TV series "Los Serrano"? In the scene where her children face her death, the song "I'll find a way" by Rachael Yamagata was playing in the background and I couldn't stop my tears. I knew it must be very hard when you lose a parent. But I didn't know how hard.

And then suddenly I lost you. I'm still angry. I'm angry at life that didn't give us any sign that something bad would happen tomorrow while we were laughing together, convinced that we were fine and healthy. But you were not fine. Forgive me for not noticing. Forgive me because I think I will never forgive myself.

I still believe that injustice has happened. I feel like someone kidnapped you from me. I'm still waiting for life to bring you back. I didn't get tired of waiting. I think I'll wait my whole life listening to that song again. And I repeat "I'll find a way, to see you again..."

I have to find a way. I know I have to because you taught me to always find a way. I have to find a way because I don't do well in this darkness anymore. I stumble, I fall, and every time I fall I get up harder. I'm losing strength. I listen to that song again and repeat the verses.

" Wait for me...I need you desperately. I am alive when you are here. And the rain is like an orchestra to me..."

I'm waiting for the rain to wash me so I can breathe. I'm still waiting to wake up from the nightmare and continue the life in which you are there with me. I want to say "dad" again. I'll find a way...

We used to celebrate this day with joy. You loved your birthday. You loved life. Happy birthday to you, dad. Wait for me wherever you are so we can celebrate together again and make our plans and wishes come true.

Thank you @Read.Cash for allowing me to fulfill my greatest wish and talk to my dad again. This must be the only way. I found a way.

Thank you very much for reading.

The article and the lead image are original and mine.

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Written by   225
3 months ago
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Comments

So emotional article... so real and nice... You are lucky because your relationship with your father has been so good, not my case unfortunately... But I read something that made me feel amazed: Did you watch "Los Serranos"? The Spanish TV serie?!!!???!

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3 months ago

Yes! I loved them very much, I would watch it again! 😀 Did you watch it?

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3 months ago

Jaja yes we watched here, in that time, everybody (in a national tv channel when there were just a few). And the "end" of the series was very commented and still used for memes and jokes. "It can be a dream like the end of Los Serranos"... So surprised you watched too there.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

It was a very good series. I loved all the characters and experienced everything as if it was really happening. 😊 A lot of life situations that can be felt while watching. The end surprised me at first and then I liked it because Diego actually dreamed everything. He dreamed of his biggest fears, that his wife would die, that his son would end up in prison, etc. Now I would really like to watch it again. 😀

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2 months ago

Maybe we all dream of what we fear... it was a weird final yes. I remember those series (there were other during those years very popular). Glad you watched there too and you like it even more than people here jaja 😀😀

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2 months ago

I also liked very much Los hombres de Paco 😀

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2 months ago

@Jelena read that new! With translation maybe or not.... It's about Los Serranos, it seems maybe there will be a special new meeting after 20 years. https://www.msn.com/es-es/entretenimiento/tv/los-serrano-todo-lo-que-sabemos-del-regreso-m%c3%a1s-esperado/ar-AAZlCe5?li=BBpmbhJ

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2 months ago

Omg! We have shared the same TV childhood jaja "Los Hombres de Paco" was a very funny tv serie and the music and some actors became very famous...

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2 months ago

A father's love will not fade even though he is gone.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

Dad is a man we can't express love to when we're around, but we miss him when he remains away. Though it hurts still wishing Happy Birthday to him.

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3 months ago

My condolences 🤨

$ 0.01
3 months ago

I know your dad is happy now. I wish him happy birthday

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3 months ago

I felt sad while reading this my friend ,anyway happy birthday to your dad.He us only watching from you and maybe he is happy now so don't be sad my friend.

$ 0.01
3 months ago

Happy birthday to your father sis Jel. I got sad with it and I wish you happiness despite of losing him. Someday, oyou will see each other again. In the right time. Be happy sis, I know your father is happy for you now.

$ 0.01
3 months ago