From Worry To A Cry of Happiness

I get too emotional when the family is already involved in such circumstances. When I learn that someone from the family is not well, it seems like I don't go well too. Probably because I'm too emotionally attached and concerned with each member of the family.

November 25, 2021 (Thursday)

I thought this was just a normal, same, usual day for me until my sister messaged me on Facebook about our father.

The conversation is in Bisaya so I'll just translate this into English.

My sister said, "Papa went to the doctor to have him checked". I replied, "Why?".

She replied, "He keeps on burping. His stomach feels like full of air. He's with mama".

I replied, "Is his tummy bloated? Maybe hyperacidity?".

I asked multiple questions because papa has an acidic stomach and it runs in the family. But I know it's something else already because you know, our parents don't want to have themselves checked because they're afraid of the diagnosis and the expenses for the bill.

Then again, I worried as high as you can imagine because it's not his personality to go to the doctor. He would resort himself to the "albularyos" as much as he can. He grew up in that family's culture though.

Hours after, I messaged my sister again and she replied.

She replied, "he needs to undergo several lab tests but just wait for the schedule. For now papa has protein and sugar on his urinalysis".

I replied, "So what's the best solution?". She replied, "Will buy medicine for his burping and right abdomen pain".

I replied, "What about the lab?". She replied, "He needs to undergo fasting blood sugar to check if he has diabetes".

I was shocked when she told me that. I mean, it's not in the family's bloodline to have diabetes. Or maybe it is but he's the first one to have it. I questioned how, why, when, all of those questions. I was confused and it's hard to accept knowing that diabetes is a lifetime disease. It changes a lifestyle of a person.

From then on, I kept thinking about how he's doing. I mean for sure the house's mood is anxious and sad.

November 26, 2021 (Friday)

Mama decided to just have papa undergo his lab tests at a different hospital so that we'll know what's going on as soon as possible.

We were so afraid and anxious about what's to come but we have to be brave and face it. However, the hospital didn't allow them to have papa undergo an ultrasound because he has to fast 8-12 hours before the procedure.

I am also thankful for my parent's company with them during the check-ups and various appointments because somehow it eases the stress of the two and they have a guide to go through the process.

They have company all along because mama's co-teacher and her sister want to have themselves get checked too because they can feel something on their stomach too.

November 27, 2021 (Saturday)

I knew it's gonna be a long day for my parents. The amount of stress it gave me is on a different level and for sure what more to my parents' side.

They went to the hospital and underwent an ultrasound and fasting blood sugar test. The result will be given 2 days after. So it's another day of being constantly worried about what the result would be.

The result of his fasting blood sugar test is 221 which is so high. That's a high blood sugar count. That confirms that he has diabetes.

I called mama that evening to check how they're doing but obviously, they're sad still in shock about the situation. Papa couldn't eat as much anymore and he started to eat corn as a substitute for his rice because of his diabetes.

I stopped the call and said goodbye after a few minutes because I knew I'm gonna cry talking to them and I don't want to show my vulnerability because it'll affect them as well.

I had trouble sleeping that night.

November 28, 2021 (Sunday)

I went to church early with my alcohol and pepper spray. I couldn't focus on the mass because my mind is on my family's situation. Then again, I told myself to not worry that much because I might get sick too which I felt I am already because my hyperacidity says hello again.

When you know that tomorrow is the result day, I couldn't stop myself thinking about what-ifs, how worse would papa undergo everything, and all that.

I called a friend to share my problems and worries because I need to let them out and ease the stress. It did help me. Thanks for the company!

November 29, 2021 (Monday)

The day has come. The most awaited but most frightening day at the same time. I called my parents early in the morning to let them know that they have to be strong and stop overthinking.

I told papa to not think negatively but he said that he can't avoid it. I mean, it's very understandable. I tried my very best to not cry over the phone because it'll make them sad so I excused myself on ending the call before it gets cut.

The whole day my mind is on my parent's situation. How they're doing, are they eating while waiting, are they safe? I want to be there with them but grandma will have no company here so I couldn't go.

Then I texted mama in the afternoon about the ultrasound's result.

I asked her if they've arrived already to the hospital and how they're doing.

She replied, " We're still here at Maramag (Bukidnon municipality) nak (daughter), we're number 19 on queue waiting for the doctor's consultation. His kidneys are normal although the findings said he has fatty liver and renal cyst.

To me reading that text, scared a lot of me. It sounds so serious to me and I checked google about the two conditions and it made me anxious more. For the whole afternoon, I couldn't get myself at ease and around 6 pm I asked mama if they're done and this is what she replied,

"I'll just call you later nak, I'm here at the pharmacy buying medicines".

So that means to say that they're done with the consultation. My stress and worry went as high as you could ever imagine. Imagine yourself waiting for a call but at the same time, you're afraid of taking it because it might be the worst news ever?

I waited for an hour and I was glad they're home safe.

She called me and I told myself to be ready for whatever it is about.

Mama told me that papa's condition is easy to manage. This can be managed through medications, we won't need surgery for it. The good thing is that his condition was diagnosed early.

I am so happy to hear this news from mama. I thanked God for everything. I apologized to him for being so negative but I also told him that whatever the result is, we'll do the best solution for it. It is somehow accepting the worst situation so I won't get disappointed.

Then again, God is so good! You'll never know about what's to come, really. You just have to be brave and be ready for it so when you get there, it will all make sense. God arranged this situation for us, and we should be grateful knowing after all of this.

Thank you so much for sending prayers to my family. I highly appreciate it.

Lead image source

Thanks for reading.

Keep safe everyone!