August 22, 2022
A blissful Monday everyone! It's a busy day as always and once this day falls, everyone at work would probably want to immediately jump to the weekend. I do think like that at busy times and always hope for a statutory holiday. Speaking of which, I checked it online with the hope of seeing a holiday this August, but to no avail. However, there is one in September, and that's the Mid-Autumn Festival that everyone is anticipating. We'll be seeing different mooncakes again these coming weeks. Enough with the nonsensical stuff and let's get straight to the topic.
I was contemplating my old goals yesterday. Remembering those old days when I was still too motivated and determined made me compare my old and current self. I somehow missed my newbie self, full of enthusiasm, determination, and goals. But as years passed by, the fire that fuels my passion seemed to slowly diminish and the enthusiasm weakened.
A lot of changes happened, that includes never-ending struggles that put some goals aside. Some were halted, and some were scraped off from the list. It just seems to be so easy to create goals but pursuing them takes a lot of effort and struggle. And a lot of time I fell and lost my desire to continue my passion.
I don't even know what my real passion is. I just go along with the flow running through the stream. I couldn't seem to know the end of it either, or if I am heading in the right direction.
Some may think I achieved a lot, but in my perspective, those are just unrealistic achievements as I couldn't seem to feel and hold them. It's the same as unrealistic PnL in trading, they are just giving false hope sometimes. They remain in the virtual world, not in the real world. And the fact is, I lost a lot not gained a lot in different aspects, such as finance, health, stability, and more.
I may consider the achievements in the financial aspect as a real one if I see more digits in my savings account, but despite the hardships and more grinding, the growth seems to be so slow and it is sometimes stagnant. And a lot of times I would ask myself, "are these all worth taking?"
What happened to my $20K Crypto goals and six-digits savings goals? They all were hampered by sudden unfavorable market upheaval. I should have achieved my crypto and savings goals by now if the market didn't crash. Or should I blame the market or my ineffective strategies?
Remembering my dollar-a-day saving goal that was to be for my laptop, it should be bigger by now and enough to buy one. But what have I done? I invested them in KONRA and CATS, but prices went down, including my investments. Was it a good move? Definitely, not. And my real cash investment turned into ashes.
My 5 BCH five-month readcash earnings were put into SmartBCH trading. But it seems like luck isn't on my side this year. Half of it was gone because of my greediness and wrong strategies. Apart from it, my more or less 10 BCH initial investment in sBCH is still at a huge loss. I seem to be wasting my hard-earned BCH and I felt guilty for being reckless, inconsistent, and irrational.
And what happened to my health goals? I seem to take it for granted and just set it aside. I seem to put more time into the less important stuff. I feel so impractical.
Should I really blame the market, or myself alone? Or probably, I set unattainable high goals that I tend to forget to take a SMARTer one.
Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bounded.
Specifically, I do know what I want to aim for and how to achieve them. Yet, I lack self-discipline and motivation to do the right thing as I tend to spend more time doing the wrong one.
Measurably, my enthusiasm to measure my goals and track my progress seemed to fade and I became so careless at some points.
Achievable, are they? My goals are achievable, however, when greediness and wrong strategy are put together, everything would seem to fall apart.
Relevantly, the reason for whom my goals are is very clear, yet, I seem to be distracted by sudden obstacles hindering my way. And sometimes I thought, does setting my goals worthwhile? I sometimes don't know the answer.
Timely, I often pressure myself to achieve a certain goal at a certain time to the point that it compromises some aspect. Thus, making everything worthless.
May it be small or big, for short-term or long-term goals, everything is pointless without the proper setting and self-discipline. I probably need to work out not putting a lot on one plate, but rather taking one goal at a time. And maybe I shouldn't be distracted by the amount I lost but rather focus on the process of how to successfully achieve my goals smartly. And instead of counting losses, I rather count the gains and blessings.
And now that Rusty is MIA, maybe I should take a break even just for a day or two? I hope it's easy. But once my body is resting, my mind is working. Overwhelming thoughts are flowing. And I'm afraid that they might turn into chaos once congested and uncluttered. But maybe I could try.
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Is easier said than done. This statement is true because we often rush to make resolution but in reality we hardly do a quarter of our resolution and promise.