No one likes sharing...
It's human nature to be jealous and protective of what we have, especially It's a lover. Though our tolerance level differs, our tendency to try to be the sole Mr or Miss to the other party tend to make us do the unthinkable.
Enough of speaking in parables. I read a post yesterday about a lady who stabbed another lady because she saw her talking to her boyfriend. I'm not in the right place to point fingers or blame someone, but I’m not a fan of people fighting someone they suspect their spouse is in a secret relationship with, if there’s anyone they need to challenge, it’s their spouse.
Not wanting to share is normal
When you are dating someone, it’s normal to crave their attention and when they are giving it to others more than the way they give it to you, you feel sad. This happens mostly in the early stage of a relationship. When one party claim he/she is too busy to meet up with you but always has time for others. When you lack the attention you seek you start feeling sad and doubts set in.
This is a natural phenomenon, no matter how people claim they are not the jealous type, once they are pushed to the limit they’d be surprised with the emotions they start feeling.
Sometimes showing a little bit of jealousy is good
Showing your partner that you crave their attention can be romantic to some people. I’ve heard of a man who pretends to be jealous just to make his wife smile and blush. The feeling of being wanted and desired, the feeling of being so important in someone’s life is second to none.
There’s a Yoruba adage that says “Iawo to ba jowu ni obe man dun”. it’s just to say when a party is jealous in a relationship, it brings out the best in them.
More harm than good
However, excessive jealousy is dangerous. So is the case of the lady I talked about earlier. Going as far as hurting someone else because they were speaking with your boyfriend is a heartless act. It’s a known fact that in marriages men cheat the most and it’s a common thing to see women fight other women having affairs with their husbands, which brings me to the question I’ve always been asking.
Why fight another lady over a man? I believe if your man is cheating on you, the only person you should confront is your man. He is the one that disrespects you by cheating, not the lady. Fighting dirty and embarrassing yourself in public isn’t the solution, instead speak with your man, he is the one you ought to have issues with and if he refuses to change you can leave for your own safety.
Also when you constantly show how angry you are or how you seek attention from your spouse it can lead to them looking for excuses every time, and when doubts start setting in, the relationship will most likely crumble.
Trust is one of the most essential ingredients of any relationship, no matter how adorable it looks when you show that you are jealous, always let your partner know that you trust them and have no reason to doubt them.
The warning signs are always there
While dating so many people ignore the red flags all in the name of love people ignore it. A girl broke her boyfriend’s Tv because he refused to give her the money she asked for, and a guy slaps a lady simply because he saw her talking to a male friend.
When someone is showing signs of excessive jealousy or protectiveness while you’re still dating, be careful, and think twice before tying the knot with such people. Toxicity is different from Love.
Thanks for Reading! 🤗💚🤗
So guys, I finally published an article on Hive today. I’ve been postponing it for a long time but today the journey begins. If you’re on hive kindly check the post out. “The genesis”, I look forward to interacting with you there. Thanks.
I guess we should be cautious even in the first date if it already showed any red flags