Your Time is Up!

March 25, 2022

Early morning, I learned a very sad news. A lady, who I learned to be my schoolmate passed away while sleeping. I just learned it from the neighbors outside because there was a vehicle that picked up her remains. I overheard who she is and my heart wants to explode. While walking as much as possible, I avoid the scene, but as soon as I passed it, my knees became weak. My feelings are in between sad, shock and scared because she is of the same age. She is fat too like me and hard working. She is the breadwinner of the family and just recently she got their house completely renovated. They just had a party last first week of March for the house blessing and now she is gone.

While on my journey to work, I still can't believe she is already gone. I remember her during our elementary days and she was fat even when she was young. Even if she is fat, she moves lighter. She can even do a cartwheel and a good dancer. She is a good singer too and very smart. Even if she is fat, she has a fair skin and very pretty face. She is more than pretty to me. She looks charming because she is always smiling. She has lots of different groups at school because she is friendly. Even when we see each other in the street she smile at me. We never become close. We are just two person who knows each other. I can't still believe she is gone.

I assumed she had a heart attack. On our way to our house I saw one neighbor and she shared that she might have had a heart attack for being overweight. When her body was found, she was color violet already. I only shrugged. The estimated time of death is 2am. This is very sad.

Something came up to me while doing my exercise. Life is too short. You don't know when and where will be your last day but it will happen someday. I am not prepared for that. I am not prepared because of my dreams, my goal, I have the best people with me, I love my family, my pets, my best friends, BTS, and everyone that accepted by indifferences. Even if I want to plan, just in case, it really cringe me thinking that one day, I will be gone.

On the other side, losing a loved one is a big trauma. I am worried for the family she left. I am overthinking if they have money, but for they have, how about her salary, her last pay, you know that kind of thing and I worry about myself. I might give all my password and emails to mys sister. I have life insurance and I will discuss it to them too, who to contact and some of my savings. And then I stop. I stop because I felt scared. I feel coward. I really need enough savings for them.

Moving on, you can always depend on God. God will heal your pain, and he will guide you. Just always talk to Him. He is a very loyal God. Everyone needs him. I should pray for the peace of the passing and for her family.

To lighten up a bit, to update you guys about my calorie deficit,I had 900+ calorie last night. I skip exercising to rest my muscle and you know what I was too tired last night. As soon as I got home I slept. I slept for less than 2 hours. I was thinking if I will do some exercises but I decided to skip. The only thing that doesn't change is my sleeping time. I still slept at 4 in the morning earlier and still I don't have a strategic plan in order to sleep for 7 hours. Sleeping 7 to 9 hours is very vital for my health and to lose weight. I'm not getting any younger and what happened to my schoolmate is a plain warning that I need to seriously do it.

Let me do it for myself first and then for my family. I start a change in myself, within me, my mindset and lifestyle change. I should beat the the big challenge. I should be consistent. Slacking off is never an option. Stopping is never an option. I need to help myself and I am very willing right now to survive this.

Before I end this, let's not think about dying, but living. We are still alive. We still have more to do, more problems to face. This is the time to appreciate being here and being able to do what we need to do. Love yourself because it will reflect how you love your family and everyone around you.

To my dear sponsor and readers, I will be forever grateful for the time you wasted reading and supporting my articles. God bless you all.

Images from Unsplash.