July 30, 2022

For today's article, I will be serious a little. I don't plan to post something for today as I'm very tired as work was loaded earlier and some people are only concerned by their quota sales and not even minding the status of other workers if they exhaust them. I really want to break a neck of someone earlier, allowing this to happen.

Before I went home I went to Korean store to just unwind. I become someone who are overly fascinated with all about Korean and hopefully someone will take me there. I was with my sister, we ate in KFC, talked a little, laughed a little and stroll a little. She bought a new set of earrings and I bought a coffee strainer. My BFF gave me a coffee granules from Dunkin donuts, not sure if it is in granules but I need to strain it first. When we went home, I had a little rest, chatted with friends, fix something and I become worried.

I became worried when one of my old friend at Facebook posted something. It was a bag. Her post was about this bag and someone we knew gave it to her. It was a long post so I can't see it all unless I click the word "see more". I was shock to see the comments of people and they say "condolences to the family". I was really shaking. I know the bag. I know who give it to her. I was there when it was given. I am her friend also.

Just a little story, we met before, I think like year 2012. She is one of the writers in Mylot and she have her online VA jobs, as in she had multiples job. Whenever we meet, we always jived. We started as two and then it became four ladies then ended in six. Two out of the six are mothers already. She and me belong to the single one. When she is with us, it was full of laughters. She is really a natural comedian.

Whenever we talk about things she gets deeper, like whatever she blurt words it will be a real talk but in the end she will include a joke so we always ends up laughing. 2013, she shared to me that no one in her family loves her. I don't get it at first and I assume she is making fun of herself. She never continue her story, I just felt that she wants to start it but she is not really willing to share all about it.

Year 2014, she never joined us in any gathering and bonding moments. She said she transferred in Cebu because of work. In her post, she became thin. We were concerned because she lost weight fast. We are assuming, she was ill. I asked her in messenger but she just give me a laughing emoji and said she is fine.

Year 2015, her sister got married. She was the closest to her. Her other siblings just ignore her, according to her and even her parents doesn't care about her. If I will ask why it happens she will answer in a funny way that all I could do is laugh. I just allow her to be like that and let her save her time and courage that she might open up one day.

Year 2016, all of us lost touched. I think that was the time we were having our own problems. I just recovered from illness that time. Then 2020, while pandemic we came back to our regular exchanging chats. All of us six are always exchanging messages and activity a day. She was quite active. Middle of 2021, she become timid again. I always chat her and do whay she always do to me, to make me laugh but she is not responding.

November of 2021, our last meeting. That was the time she gave the bag to one of our friend because it is her birthday. Now, we found out the sad news. I went o messenger to chat to that friend of mine who posted about her. I didn't bother to check in her long post at Facebook because I am really scared. I asked her and received a response.

I cried. I don't understand that she have to do that to herself. She always say, "life is a gift, we only live once, we must enjoy every minute of it", but she ended her life. She might had gone through the worst and she left with no choice. I just hope that she talks to us and share it instead. Her life is wasted, she is an intelligent woman.

Now I realize, the people who are always happy, always smiling and making you laugh, are those that are really sensitive and hurting. Their way of sharing happiness with you only means they are sad. They can hide what they really feel if they will act like they are okay. My friend is like that. She will always make some laugh and feel okay, but she is taking all the burden, making the problem get deeper by hiding it, and making things worst. I miss her. I will never got to see her again 😭.

Please check on your Happy Friends!!

Not all happy are really happy. Sometimes they choose to be happy because it is a waste of time to be sad. They choose to be happy, to hide what they really feel. They wear a mask everyday so that people around them never notice that they cry every night and they are holding to this bad feeling almost everyday. Even if you look weird, if you have a friend who is alwsts hsppy, even genuinely happy, still ask them. As a friend you will feel it. You will the truth about them. Happy people are not always happy, they all choose to be one.

Images are all mine, lead image from Unsplash