I was browsing some of my office photos when I remembered certain incidents that I cried at work. It was when I was in the middle of argument with someone. I felt exhausted and upset by his treatment on me that I cried in the middle of our argument. I cried because I hate being mad at someone or maybe I was keeping it for a long time that it burst out and he is the right person to receive it. I said lots of bad stuff against him but those are true and I experienced it. I strongly feel I was bullied by his mean jokes. It was not only for me, but for the rest of the girls in my team.

Another incident of crying was when I was confronted by a mistake I did. You know when you do your work and you thought you did it correctly, you didn't double check it like you used to do it, then boom a big mistake and you are only at fault. That was the next crying story. I felt exhausted and upset because I have lots of work load and some of my former co-worker don't even lend a hand because they hate the task, that is why all the worst task is on me because I was the Newbie and I always accept the task because I thought it supposed to be for me, for my learning and development at work and whatever. But then I realize all of the easy task were on these people and they managed to file overtime when they know they can finish the job for 4 hours. It is like cheating the company and I was not allowed to render overtime. Finish till I finished.

I cried because of frustration. Frustrated because I want to get out of that company but I need money. I want to find another job but I was not allowed to take leaves as there are loads of work.

Also in the same company, on the very last day of my stay before I hand over my irrevocable resignation, I don't want to come to work anymore, but still dragged my feet because I need to do it, one last time. When I went to the office, I felt stress already. I went to my desk and I get tired. It was the long walk. Before I hand over my resignation I never thought I will cry. I love the job. It was difficult but I was with the wrong people. I hate myself when I hate people because I cannot stay long. Imagine I will be working with them and I hate them. Imagine the mental stress I am giving to myself.

After a long introduction, this is the question, is it okay to cry at work?

Before we proceed, let me just share a little bit about my humble sponsors. I am forever grateful for them for uplifting me here and their support, not only the tip from it, but the comment I received means so much for my soul to stay here. Thank you guys!!

Let us continue..

Why do we cry at work?

Even if you will look like unprofessional, crying at work is just normal. We are human beings and when we cannot control our emotions, sometimes we cry at work. Women cry at work more than men. This is a hormonal thing, as when we cry we are increasing prolactin, associated with crying.

The possible reasons of crying at work are.

• Exhaustion, burnout, stress, tiredness

• Arguments

• Frustration

• Overwhelm, either being happy or sad, or due to tons of work loads

• Family problems or relationships problems

• Rejection

• Unfair treatment

• Expectations versus reality

We could cry at the office and that is okay. It is more okay to cry in front if your officemates or co-workers than with your manager. With your co-workers, empathy develops. You are putting yourself in their shoes, on they feel at the moment and the reason of crying. They will feel they are not alone. The connections starts.

When you cry in front of your manager, it could mean one thing, you are lacking professionalism, but it always depends on what kind of relationship you and your manager have.

Is it okay to Cry at Work?

We only cry when things are out of control. When we are focus and thinking about the job alone, we can control our emotions or we can cry in a private area in the office, ladies room perhaps. Crying in the office creates commotion. If the people around you do not know the reason behind your crying, they will get nervous or curious, that could lose their focus at the task in front of them. Consider the people that are around you. Moreover, since sometimes it is out of our control when emotions burst out, we cry to put out all the heavy feelings, the stress, the burnout energy that are accumulating inside us. Crying helps us to be okay. We just let it all out.

Video credit to Brad Yates YouTube Channel

Crying is Unprofessional and you feel Unconfident

As I said, crying at work is okay. We are only human, we have episode in our life that we feel tired in doing things all over and sadly we are at work when we felt that. We cannot hide the feeling, so we cry. We cry while reading emails, while typing, while checking a report, and doing our task. The tears are pouring down and we can't stop it. It is okay.

When is not okay is when it happens all the time. We have a strong emotions when we feel like crying. We cannot bear the weight in our chest but do you know that all if these emotions are piling up emotions since the day we had problems, a long long long time ago. Until the issues are not resolved, we are bearing the pain and the weight of it is getting heavier.

Above is a tapping from Brad Yates, about removing emotional pain. This is not only about crying at work, but also crying at home, lol. I means this is about emotions all over that controls your decision to be the best version of yourself or just to be the best person everyday. You started with being cheerful and this emotions strikes you in the middle and ruin your focus. For sure it will lead to a bad day.

Why I am suggesting this?

Because I cried in all the companies I stayed before, I realized I failed to managed my emotions. Our employer is expecting us to do the job as stated in our job description. As a person we are only humans and we feel not at our best sometimes, but still we are paid based from their expectations so we need to do the job as expected to us. I want to apply professionalism despite what I feel and I want to practice that, that is why I search for the things that would help me and it is part of the self-therapy I shared to your from my previous posts.

That video above, I do it, when I know I am not at my best, an hour before going to work. Actually, that video also tells me to not go to work when I feel I cannot be as professional as expected. I don't want to suffer while working so I need to be at my best whenever I am at work. I do it repeatedly, until I feel okay. I need to be *prepared, mentally and physically. I still feel the stress, but I also practice to have a good stress, which means reacting and knowing the problem to find the better solution instead of saying "why does it happen to me all the time". I ended being a drama queen at work. I hate myself for doing that.

I recommend that video and the rest of the videos about tapping to remove emotional pain

It is a must. We need to be calm and we deserve a peaceful day that even there are distractions, we can go back to what we are doing, reacting to the problem and end the day at work with a warm smile. We should be admitting and accepting our mistake with willingness to learn from it and not feel sorry for ourselves for being dumb. We are always given at chance to live but always remember to be in a state of calm and happy, don't ever deprive yourself from having that kind of feeling. I highly suggest you to use Emotional Freedom tapping as your self-therapy.

The Changes it made me

I became a better person, lol. But seriously, I was not the person I was before. I was childish and immature, I even one on the team of gossiper, but not all the time though, honestly speaking. When I Met EFT tapping and the different tappings for different emotions, I always move on when problem arises. I still feel stress, exhausted, burnout, tired and negative at times but I do not speak to my officemate when I feel that. I only sigh. At present when I feel it, I have the steps and methods to over come it. I play music and sing along. I tell jokes so that when everyone laugh, I laugh too, then I will avoid thinking or feeling stress. I also walk around. Get some air. Go to ladies room and stay for a while saying my affirmation that "I am at my best, all the time". Or I will find something to eat, Ice cream!!!

I do not entertain the drama. I cry, still. But I don't allow myself to feel it the whole day. I need to cry. I cry in the ladies room. I cry in my table but I wipe my tears immediately. I don't invite people to see me cry. I cry while working and I stop. That's it. I did improve and I am staying that way. That is why I suggest you, to help yourself too.

I was missing yesterday due to sprain. I still have it but I forced myself to write this article. Something is telling me to write this so I'm finished it. Someone might need it tonight or in the future. It helps me big time. Let us help one another to survive the challenges we are facing everyday, just like we are in Squid Game, lol.

#BetterSeptember

Images from Unsplash

September 23, 2021