Stop enduring nonsense.

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Avatar for George_Dee
2 years ago

Our generation is misinterpreting a lot of things and it doesn't feel cool seeing the repercussions of their silly belief, people are losing their lives every day all for the sake of being in a relationship that doesn't have to be so. Anything that doesn't give you peace or happiness, anything that serves as a threat to your life must be cut off. I don't care what it is, as long as your life is on the line for doing or engaging it then it is not worth it.

I am practically writing this to every woman/lady/girl that comes across this article, I pray you don't lose your life trying to prove a point especially when it has to do with relationships. This doesn't mean the males are not affected but the females fall victim to this problem.

When our mothers are talking to us about their marriage, many of them usually make it clear that they suffered with our father before they became what they are today.

A lot of females today have misinterpreted the word "suffered" and it has turned their lives into something else in their marriage, it is a good thing for a woman to stand by her man because that was what most of our parents meant but it is the other way around today.

Some weaklings who call themselves men now find pleasure in abusing their wives physically and some of our females today would sit comfortably in such relationships claiming that after all, their mom suffered with their dad. I am not sorry to say this but enduring such a thing is like digging your grave before you even die because sooner or later, a man who finds pleasure in beating you at any slight issue would put you in a bus going to the afterlife.

The suffering our mother endured has to do with not having the things they needed but they struggled with their husband to improve their life materially, financially and in other areas, this doesn't mean there weren't men who abuse their wives then but not at the rate we are seeing today.

I am staying because of my kids.

Is it until he kills you before you understand that your kids would suffer more if he marries another wife after you are gone?

Nothing is worth you giving your life for and you are close to death once your marriage becomes a threat to your life, your kids will live after.

Some countries take the issue of domestic violence seriously and they will go at any length to get justice for the woman but when you are in a lawless country like where I am writing this from right now, you might be endangering your life all in the of giving your kids a good life.


Do you think your kids are happy seeing you serve as a man punching bag? Or what mentality do you think you are building in them?


You want your male children to think it is normal for them to beat their wife since you are enduring it or the female child to settle for something like that.

Many of us think we can't give our kids a good life but we are mistaken and this mentality is coming as a result of the fact that we depend too much on our men. Opting in for the position of a full housewife is a big issue because it deprives you of some rights in your relationship, it might sound somehow but that is the truth.

People will speak dirty about me.

If you think anyone cares about your life then you are making a big mistake, the same world you are worried about what they will say will also say that you are foolish to have endured the abuse to the point of losing your life.

Putting the world into consideration above your peace, life, happiness, mental health and physical health is shit because no one cares about what you do with your life.

If anything happens the same world will use your story as a lesson to other young ladies our there. In life, you are either an inspiration or a lesson to others and the choice is yours to make.

The reason why many people are stuck in an abusive relationship is that:


1. Financial purpose

After putting the financial aspects of their life into consideration a lot of people will choose to stay, I can't afford a big house in the best part of the city, I can't go around in expensive cars, I might be able to put my kids in the best schools and so on, that is why every woman must have a means of income.

Thank God the world has gone digital and this gives us different opportunities to earn, there is a way to earn that will fit into your time.

2. Having excessive kids.

People don't see this as a problem until power changes hand in their relationship, having too many kids would some women stay because the first thing that would come to their mind is how do I cater for all of them?

These articles wasn't written to advise anyone but I believe some points would make you think twice about enduring domestic violence. As for the single, we should be sure of what we are getting into. A man doesn't just become abusive over the night, you must have been seeing signs you are not taking seriously.

It is a long list and whatever we think ours is doesn't worth it trading our lives for, we should always be prepared ahead for things like that. Don't lose guard because your relationship is smooth today, always pray that God should never allow the devil, and don't be the devil yourself.

Whoever or whatever makes you feel that you won't be able to survive alone is just trying to walk you into the grave, it might be tough but it will get easier and it is better than enduring the everyday beating.

I said earlier that this is not an advice, your life matters more than anything. I have a true life story that inspired this which happened to someone I know very well and I will share the story tomorrow to avoid adding to the already lengthy article.

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Avatar for George_Dee
2 years ago

Comments

I agree with you that is why I would like to tell everyone women I know that we should be a " FINANCIALLY INDEPENDENT". It is very important because in case you got an abusive husband you can leave him without thinking . You know you can manage. Besides we have a law here in our country to protect us (What is Republic Act 9262 in the Philippines). In addition I believed that somehow if a man knows the capability of his wife somehow he would think twice before committing those. So if ever my husband would abuse me, I gonna leave and sue him.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

It is great when your country has laws that protect women from abuse but how effective are they.

Do you know there is a woman who keeps their suffering to themselves because of the things I stated in the article? They don't want to lose the sweet things they are enjoying in the relationship.

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2 years ago

I know there are still women who suffers because of their own reasons. Maybe some of them are we called martyr while others are ignorant how to fight for thier rights. I am just hoping they would realized their worth before its too late

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2 years ago

I wouldn't dispute the fact that some would still sit to endure it just because they are scared of surviving alone out there.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Hmmmmm

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2 years ago

I agree our life matters more than anything else, and its utter nonsense to bear this kind of treatment from your partner. I appreciate your positive thinking.

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2 years ago

That's true, for no reason should any gender settle for domestic violence in relationship.

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2 years ago

This is reality. Financial is the number one reason of everything

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2 years ago

I have always said that there's no valid excuse to stay in an abusive relationship of kind, be it physical, financial, material, emotional or otherwise

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2 years ago

There is really no reason but people put their lives at risk by feeding themselves lies and impossibilities.

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2 years ago

I get pissed off to whenever I hear cases like this where the man will be beating his wife at every little mistake that she did and the woman will remain in such a marriage. Is that not madness or a stupid act. It's those beating that has led to the loss of many lives in this country. The women need to wise up and never allow one stupid love to enter their eyes and forget to fight for their life.

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2 years ago

It can't be referred to as love anymore as long as there is an act of abuse in the relationship.

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2 years ago

Those ladies see it as love and they allow that dig their early grave all in the name of love love

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2 years ago

This is one of the many topics I love writing about and I am passionate about. Weak men are those who abuse women because they feel the need to salvage their crushed ego. Women needs to do better and desire better.

I don't know if you saw that short documentary, I got flowers? Here it is:

https://youtu.be/rypMbcHSYlE

That's how it always ends and the guy would move on. Women are sometimes scared of starting over and that's wrong. They want to stay for kids and the same kids won't enjoy you when you are gone , so what's the point?

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2 years ago

That's video speaks it all, she had every time to leave but kept holding up because he showed her fake affection after the torture. It ended in the grave.

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2 years ago

Absolutely... She still got her flowers but this time around she couldn't sniff it...sadly.

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2 years ago

Short but great clip, even some three hours movie self no get sense reach the short video.

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2 years ago

😂😂😂🤣🤣😂😂😂 that's so true.

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2 years ago

It's sad really. A lot of people are in abusive relationships/marriages for reasons I can't comprehend. I am actually more concerned about the damage domestic violence has on children, as this is moulding them into the kind of people the society do not need. I hope for as many that saw this post, they can learn a thing or two from it.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

I couldn't agree more, it is the children who is most affected.

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2 years ago

It prepared their mind terribly and the future really doesn't need that type of thing now.

Parents are role models to their kids but a lot of them aren't passing on the right lesson.

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2 years ago

This is the world we found ourselves. The worst part is the people that are in just mere relationship (not married), enduring such because she doesn't want people to talk and mock her. Anytime I read about this on social media, it puts me off

$ 0.02
2 years ago

That's the height of it, boyfriend and girlfriend even go to the height of abusing each other. I have read many death cases on the internet and I ask myself, what were they looking at till it got to that level? The victim should have stepped out.

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2 years ago

hmmm, I couldn't agree more! While you are truly right in all of the above aforementioned, I cannot say everyone agrees even the most intelligent woman in the right mind would. Well, sad, I am actually losing a friend for that folly in the glimpse of hope her husband will change, but he gave her STD and now she is dying of cervical cancer. Not the typical physical abuse but this is still abusive eyt? She is suffering physical pain and is fighting for her life, even working at these moments to pay the bills while hubby is just working part time. I don't really know what went wrong but she said "her misery, her own". Sad.

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2 years ago

That's ridiculous, it is sad hearing this. I pray she doesn't lose herself to the illness all in the name of love.

Anything that threatens our life should be cut off because it is only when we are alive we can do other things.

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2 years ago

Oh! ridiculous as it seem to you but she is dying. She is now admitted and will not be released until she gets better? Now infection is reigning her body, now suffering from stomach abcess. The infection really has spread, unfortunately.

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2 years ago

Omo, the earlier we stop enduring shit for people, the better for us.

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2 years ago

So sad! I think most mothers do not actually sit their daughters down to fully explain what they mean by "I suffered with your Dad"

Ladies needs to know when to opt out in a marriage especially when they are victims of violence or physical abuse by their husbands.

Before going into marriage, lady especially must have a source of income to help herself because having the mentality that your husband would cater all for you and the children isn't ideal.

When you are being abused, you should leave and stop being acting patient because of children.

Also, having too much children isn't the best. You should know when to stop child bearing. Not for anything else but to be able to handle them incase something happens.

$ 0.04
2 years ago

The thing is that some of these girls were taught but they wouldn't learn, they make the wrong choices of men just because of the goodies they get and they won't even know when to back out until they are at the point of death.

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2 years ago

They choose to stay na all because of the statement "I know he will change, let me endure especially for my children" and the sad part is they die in the process? Who then lose?

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2 years ago

Check the video @olasquare shared in his comment, it speaks a lot because if the victim eventually dies. He or she will still lose it all.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Exactly... eventually they still end up losing.

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2 years ago

Most people have greatly misinterpreted what our mothers meant by saying they stuck with their husbands through thick and thin, they actually meant they hustled with him and helped in building up their wealth, and not that she turned into his personal punching bag.

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2 years ago

It is really funny how this generation of our think when it comes to relationships matters, the thing is affecting a lot of them.

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2 years ago

Now so many people need to see this. I seea lot of domestic violence in mov and it is disgusting to know it actually happens in real life. Any woman undergoing this shod follow your advice here. Then the men doing this, on their part should be ashamed of themselves.

I cannot fathom what would make you hit a woman. No matter how angry a woman gets you, simply walk away from the scene.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

There is no where disagreement won't happen in relationships and hitting your partner is really wrong, I think it is advisable to encourage people to test their partner patient limit to know how matured they are.

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2 years ago

Louder please. This is really an eye opener to everyone. Can I share it to my social media to spread awareness?

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2 years ago

You are free to do so, it is best when we let people understand and the mistakes they are making.

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2 years ago

It's so sad to see this getting more common and common by the day. The tbind I'd that it isn't really as easy as it seems to get out once you're in that's why it is advised to know whom you're dealing with before venturing into marriage with a person. Some men transform into animals within few years of marriage and it keeps you wonderinz if this is the man you really fell in love with. My sister's out there should be very careful. Submission is totally different from enduring abuse.

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2 years ago

You are right, it is funny how people change after the wedding.

There is a long gap between submission and enduring abuse, I can encourage submission but not a pinch of abuse in relationship.

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2 years ago