Disclaimer;

Dear readers;

This time, I'll be going to share with you a serious issue. This is actually my friend's concern, but because I am not an expert when it comes to this kind of situation, I needed your advice so I can also help her

So my friend is already married. They get married last 2018, but she just give birth to their first child last year . So her child is just 8 months old this time as she give birth last December 2021.

So here is her confession.

I love my husband, yes I do. I still do. However there are really time's that I really feel annoyed with him, most specially if he is asking my time and attention. I don't know why, but sometimes I really looked at him as my biggest distraction, not my husband whom I love back then.

There are really time's that I honestly feel guilty, specially the fact that I know that I am neglecting him. I feel guilty most specially if he do some efforts just to make me happy, like buying me my cravings, giving me some flowers etc. and yet I only makes him feel neglected. I know I look bad as a wife to him, but... I don't know what's happening to me.

To tell you honestly I don't understand with myself anymore, I've been trying to figure it out where' s my confusion coming from, but I can't find any answer. I am aware with my mistakes and shortcomings to our relationship but I can't change, rather I continue being cold to my husband.

I can't tell and I really can't figure out about what is happening to me. After I give birth, I have noticed some changes about my behaviour towards him. I started hating him. I even started hating him whenever he tried to touch me. I swear, I can saw myself transforming into a dragon whenever he tried to cuddle me. A dragon that, at any moment will gonna burn him alive because of annoyance. Sometimes I was like a lion. A lion that would definitely fight and attack her prey.

Am I depressed?? Am I still okay?

I try to get back the old me, but every time I saw him, I feel annoyed and that makes me roll my eyes to him🤦. I love him, and I mean it. But however there are really time's that I also asked myself, if do I still really love him?

I am so much confused with myself. Suppose I should also give him some time and care, as I am his wife. But I choose to focus to my work and to our daughter, than wasting my time to him. Yeah, I can feel for sometime that spending time to him is a waste. I don't understand why am I feeling this way! I feel like I'm crazy.

Well I still prepare his food. I still wash his clothes and I still take care of him whenever he gets sick. But was it already enough?

Sometimes whenever he gets a bad mood, he sometimes blame me. He sometimes call me naive and fake. He says I am near yet too far from him and that makes him mad.

Furthermore he also told me, how disappointed he was to me, and I feel like dying inside because of guilt. He was really right, I don't even bother sending him a message whenever he was away. I don't even asked him what's his doing and how is he outside, and I don't even bother calling him when he was on travel for work. I realize that I become selfish.

Actually it's not that I don't want to send him a message, it's honestly because I don't remember him because I was so busy.

I know, I disappointed him. I know I am bad, but I am literally confused. I feel like I lost my old self and I am having a hard time to get my old self back. I'm stressed and exhausted already.

I love him so much, and honestly whenever I imagine that he will be going to leave me one day, I feel hurt. I am scared that he might gets tired of me. I am scared that he might broke up with me as he cannot understand me anymore.

I really can't fixed myself, and I needed help how to let him know about my confusion. I don't even know how am I going to explain myself.

Am I needed a doctor?

___confusedWife___

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Message;

Hello everyone, I hope you didn't feel confused with my friends confession. Actually I understand her, as I think she's suffering from postpartum depression but I also can't help her, it seems like she really needs an expert to have a better advice.

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