Patience is a virtue that takes time to develop. It's the sort of patience that only comes with people who have grown up in a specific time or a specific location. It's the patience you learn from previous mistakes. It's the patience of taking the time to figure out the right things to say at the right time. It's the patience of realizing that just because it's meant to be doesn't mean you have to say it.
Conversations are not the same everywhere you go. They are different from person to person. They are never the same in different places. So it's easy to think that what works for someone else in one situation will work for you in another.
Anger is a demon that needs to be tamed before it destroys you. It has lead to havoc at home and in the workplace. Domestic violence is largely due to uncontrollable anger.
Take the time to learn when you're speaking with a common foe that has caused you to lose patience with them. The act of anger can become a self-fulfilling prophecy and you will lose your patience faster than you can blink. With this in mind, recognize that anger can be a powerful tool to neutralize your foes. But recognize also that you don't always need to punch them in the mouth. And sometimes you don't even need to punch them. Sometimes what's easier for one person to do is for another person to do it with their eyes shut. Sometimes you just need to stop, take a deep breath, and let someone else do it.
Vindication
Many of the heroes from myths and legends had lives where they learned patience first-hand. These people went down in the end, but they lived fulfilling lives where they overcame their issues.
These lessons are not special tricks for those who have a strong temperament. Their wisdom can be applied to us all. But it's important to remember that the things that changed the course of history weren't magical. They were human beings with real mistakes, who determined their life's course using patience.
Start With Yourself
When it comes to the role of patience in our lives, there is no one-size-fits-all set of circumstances. Different people are unique in how their failings affect their lives.
One person has to find the context for his or her anger to develop. Some people are extremely resistant to change, especially when it comes to actions that change their lives. Others have a natural ability to move through obstacles. But all of us have to learn patience.
Just as the key to learning to read human beings is to start with yourself, so is it to learn to be patient with people. If you are someone who is sensitive to criticism, then you have to learn to become a little bit less forgiving with yourself. And if you are someone who is always negative, then be aware that your method of getting your anger out isn't the best way.
Take the time to ask yourself, "How did I react? How did I react when I was feeling annoyed, frustrated, anxious, or irritated? How did I react when I was stressed or bored?" And if the answer is, "I didn't really give a shit," then change that in yourself. Change your reaction. Make sure it isn't a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Perception Versus Reality
One of the secrets to managing impatience in the present moment is to recognize that your reactions are a reflection of your thinking. After all, to be an adult you first need to become a child.
If you are always overly sensitive to people, then you don't ever learn to differentiate reality from perception. You can't separate your frustration from how you behave. So you pay little attention to the bad behavior or ignore it because it's not concerning you. This can lead to frustration that can turn into anger.
Dangerous Anger
Not all anger is dangerous. Some of the most frustrating people in the world are people who are constantly using their anger to lash out at others or to prove to themselves that they can get their way. It's as if there are roads marked "get revenge" and "shut up" that lead to deep inward violence.
If you go down this road, then you can have frustrating and dangerous conversations. But when you're able to listen to these people, you see they have very clearly defined paths for getting their way and only meet resistance on those paths. They don't really value the resentment.
If you can relate to this, then you can start seeing that these people don't experience frustration from others because they are unable to take the time to look at their responses and examine them. It's not about looking for conflict. It's about looking for clarity. And like all the roads in the middle of nowhere, once you find a path that's not clogged with sharp rocks, you can then drive around the obstacles.
Know when you are going to reach the peak Of your potential anger.
It's natural to let your anger reach a point where it becomes dangerous. And it's left to you to choose to control it by being patient with others.
Anger is a passion that disconnects us from our reasoning by releasing instinct. I wonder how instinctive is that passion?
I understand that everyone is born with an unchanging temperament. Well, I'm not convinced of that. Whoever experiences real love is transformed and surely filters any passion to the extreme of transmuting the immutable temperament.
Being meek of the heart is the key to happiness that disturbs the wildness of passions. Do you want to be patient? Then hurry to love yourself and others. How many times have you been angry with yourself? Many without knowing it. Learn to recognize it and truly love yourself so that you can love others.