Is the standard really matter in searching for a lifetime partner?

Avatar for Eybyoung
4 years ago

Every woman has set standards on what kind of man they want to date or to be their lifetime partner. Some women are fun of fantasizing about their romantic partner to be, like those characters they've seen in movies or like those who are in novels without considering it was all a fiction character. Every human has imperfections, every man is flawed equally to us 'women'. Finding an ideal man is hard, because from the word itself 'ideal' it is something unreal or nonexistent.

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Some women are so obsessed with their standards, they don't give it a try to date someone who showed them interest when their standard was not meet. They always said 'It is better to be single than to settle for less' yes, of course, it is valid but it doesn't mean when you go for dating or giving yourself and the guy chance to date, you are already settling. A romantic relationship has stages, one or more dates cannot be the basis for settling down it takes a lot of time and consideration before you consider that thing. How will you know that you are compatible with that person if you didn't even give a chance to get to know each other just because he does not coincide with your standards?

Some women just keep believing that destiny will give the right man for them, the right man that fits their standards. Destiny is a matter of chance if you let it slide thinking it ain't the destiny works, then you are doomed. Destiny will only give you the chance to meet the person but it does not work the whole thing for you. You have to work your ass off, you have to flirt for Pete's sake don't be lazy, go and date if you don't want to be an old made lol.

The setting of the standard is good, it could be the basis for the traits you want to entrust yourself with. It can save you from dating unworthy persons, it can save you from entering into toxic relationships 'somehow' yet it cannot guarantee you that you will have a successful relationship by following all your norms. Being so obsessed with your standard is another story, it is not good because you are limiting yourself to the possibilities of meeting someone who is beyond your standards. Don't you know, some people are wearing masks? (not the literal mask to avoid COVID-19 lol). Some people are hiding their true identity in the first stages of dating, they are not showing their real colors on the first basis to avoid bad impressions. You might think that the one who meets your standards are really the one, it is not like that. Are you even sure they won't change at all? are you even sure they are not just pretending to persuade you?

Some reject someone easily just because they smoke or drink liquor on a daily basis, you cannot judge someone just because you saw them once doing it. Reject them if you see they are not going anywhere because they were drowned by their vices. Do not look into outer appearance instead look into the inner soul, and you will only know the beauty of that inner soul when you give a chance to get to know each other.


I started dating when I was 15 years old, I flirt early right? lol but I enjoyed it πŸ˜† I mean my youth was never boring. It was just dating without involving sexual contact (I am clever, I don't let those boys get me lol). I never had a standard before when I am dating, just that I like to go with good looking guys, you know it can boost self-confidence having a handsome boyfriend lol. Actually, I don't trust boys before that is why I had a lot of flings because when they initiate any sexual actions I dump them instantly, I know what they wanted from me, so I leave before anything happens safety first πŸ˜†, they are also confident in doing it because they think I am an easy catch, but heck they are wrong. When I reach 18 years old, I already dated 21 guys, call me flirt it's okay but I do preserve myself. The 22nd guy is the last guy I am with right now. As I said I don't have any standard, I date guys to know them first. Until this 22nd guy let me know what should be my standard. That I want a guy who will respect me, who is afraid of touching me because it might offend me. He let me know I want a responsible man, who after stability in life rather than fooling around. This guy showed me respect despite that I am an alcoholic girl, that I go to bars during the night. Actually, flirting a lot is just my camouflage to know real guys who will have respect regardless of what you are. But what about this guy? Well, he gets to know me, the real me without the mask that I am not what others think, and he sticks to me for 10 years now and he also knows he is the 22ndπŸ˜† (I am not that pretty, Malandi lang Talaga lol). This isn't applicable to all so date according to your will with precautions.

Always remember, you will only know the real colors of people when you get to know them better. Human is full of complex, even on marriage, every day is an adjustment because you two are a different person living in one roof with different upbringings. Always have room for imperfections, the standard is just lame excuse for commitment.

So for me, the standard isn't that necessary, It is good to set some but don't get obsessed with it if you have then it must be reasonable. This is only my opinion according to my experiences, you can share yours.

Read more about the standard:

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4 years ago
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Comments

Lol i understood after dating a girl that standards don't really matter much in thenend, what matters if they'll stick by you and respect your boundaries. That's mostly it for me

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4 years ago

Matatamaan si @esciisc nito 🀣

Pro ayoko dn ng ngsisigarilyo, basta responsible , may trabaho at loyal.. Okay na yun πŸ˜‚

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4 years ago

Ako na naman talaga 🀣

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4 years ago

hhahaa di ko sinadya yan ha πŸ˜†

ganyan langbdapat standard di masyado complicated πŸ˜† Dati wala akong paki kung nagsisigarilyo or hindi pero ngayon ayoko rin ang baho kaya πŸ˜† yung asawa ko kase wlang bisyo din kaya okay na rin ako na lumandi nang maaga may napala rin nmn πŸ˜†

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4 years ago

Lumandi tlga..haha.. Ambaho nga ng sigarilyo at hndi pa healthy..mas prone yung second hand smokers sa cancer kesa sa first hand smokers

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4 years ago

Oo nga eh, lalo na pag chaine smokers meron nmn iba occasionally lang nagsisigiryo pag stress or frustrated.

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4 years ago

Okay lng ang ganun.. Iba tlga everyday, tas kakapit sa damit pati sa bahay

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4 years ago

Oo nga pati katawan amoy nicotine, ang baho.

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4 years ago

At grabe naman marsh! Wagas kung maka real talk eh. Sapul na sapul ako dito ah hahahaha 🀣

As for me, I've set a standard but it's not purely based on the physical aspects of a person. When I was in high school I'm fond of reading pocketbooks and in college, wattpad stories so it affected my standards. But as I grew older and more matured, I realized that those are only based on fiction and I won't ever find an almost perfect person. So I've changed my standards, I don't focus on looks anymore (but of course, I won't go with someone that's too ugly haha I don't want my kids to be bullied) and I'll be okay if someone's not too smart, being witty will do, and of course someone who's God-fearing ❣️

And for me, it's okay to have those standards. I don't care if people will say that I'm just making a lame excuse not to get committed but I'll still stick with my standards. But you what, someone actually reached almost 95% of the standards I've set, but I'm a hard person to love and it would take so much effort for someone to break the walls, so in the end, he left. Good thing, I haven't fallen too hard for him yet, so I saved myself from heartbreak 😊

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4 years ago

Hahahajha sorry nmn di ko sinsadya πŸ˜†

Anyway, I understand you, your standard isn't that being too picky it's just that you didn't know yet what you really want or expect from a guy. Your emotional status towards a romantic relationship is not yet fully stable, as you mentioned nobody was able to break the wall you built. I was once like that, only the last guy break the walls and able to penetrate once you meet that person you would say not all the standard you have set is applicable, as long as you feel secure and stability for future is there.

Tama don't date a guy too ugly for the future generation sakes πŸ˜†

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4 years ago

hahahah sadyang tinamaan lang talaga ako dito πŸ˜‚

That 'for the sake of future generation thingy' is sooo πŸ˜†πŸ˜‚

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4 years ago

@esciisc, ikaw talaga naisip ko sa title haha.

  • Ako naman. I have a standard before πŸ˜‚ I never dated a guy that has no education I mean when I was in college gusto ko yung kalevel ko until I graduated and had a job. I am attracted with smart guys. But you know what? Kinain ko lahat yun nung nakilala ko asawa ko πŸ˜„ Yun na nga lang gawin kong article ngayon . Wala ako maisip e haha
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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

Ako talaga naisip nyo sa topic na to 🀣

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4 years ago

hahaha bakit baa si esciics tagged nyo πŸ˜†

Oo nga sa totoo lang pag na met mo tung tamang tao di nmn na kailangan nang standards mo kase taglay na nila yun.

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4 years ago

E may article kasi si esciisc about din sa standard haha. Ayan haba ng comment nya. haha. Keyboard warrior talaga πŸ˜„

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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

haha meron pala bashin ko nga di ko nabasa, πŸ˜† oo nga best reaction paper yan eh, sobrang pag evolve nya from jeje post to advanced writer πŸ˜†

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4 years ago

Oo nga. Dati pa kape kape lang ngsyon hype na hype na e.

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User's avatar Yen
4 years ago

hahaha kaya nga eh hype na hype na magandang development evolution, sana all 😊

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4 years ago

Really Nice story dear. Keep it up

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4 years ago

Loving someone is not really easy especially a woman. When is the best time to begin a new adventure? Ideas for infusing holiday gatherings with peace? You'll love knowing when a new tide of energy comes along, so you can maximize its potential to fill your life with positivity and power. And you'll be stocked with tons of ideas for how to tap into these tides of energy: every month, week, and day of the year.

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4 years ago

what are you talking about? πŸ˜†

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4 years ago

Hahahaha feeling ko kung saan niya lang to sis nakuha. Mema kung mema si kuys 🀣

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4 years ago

I am like,comment on your post and subcribe your channel.

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4 years ago

Seriously, 21? Lodiiiiii Yo' πŸ™‹. Haha, as for me well I have a standard too, pero not that high naman. Basta madiskarte at malakas go na ☺️😜. Pero wala din yang standard naman na yaan pag tinamaan ka ni Kupido, malibn nalang kung utak ang pinairal, pero kung puso, Wala ka ng magagawa kundi sundin ito, kapag tumibok ang puso lagot kana, siguradong huli kaaaaa 🎀. Kaya ako si ako naghahanap ee, intay intay nalang, at pag walang dumating, You can call me "Ajhumma" 🀧🀧

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4 years ago

It's 22 πŸ˜† then I stopped lol. Maybe I followed the mantra collect and select πŸ˜†

Yes exactly when you fall inlove wala na yang standard na yan kung puso ang paiiralin.

Hahahaha hello Ajhumma. Wag mo hanapin kusang darating ang chances sayo na ma meet ng tao na para sayo, pero syempre landi landi din. Pano mo malalaman na yun na nag para sayo kung di mo binigyan nang chance sarili mo na kilalanin yung tao.

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4 years ago

Haha, yan ang malupet, sakin naman ay puro sa text laang πŸ˜‚

Di pa namam ako mabilis mainlove pero madali ako magka crush kaso mabilis din mawala ahaha, p.

Oo nga, diko naman talaga sya nahanap, nakakapag antay pa naman ako, pero pag naging ajhumma na nga ako, baka humugot na laang ako jan sa tabi tabi, pipikutin ko na, pipilitin kong magpaSakal sa akin πŸ˜‚. Pano lalandi kung wala namang malalandi 🀧

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4 years ago

life partner is very important, back subscribe

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4 years ago