How to: Pay Off 100K Plus Debt

A lot of people might not like this article at all but then this is a reminder that if you do not have any debt then never start because it is very hard to get off from it. Before I start to share how much was the exact amount of my debt let me tell you a little history before you judge me. I just hope this story would give you a lesson to think a lot of times before you say YES on something you should not do.

I grew up from a not middle class family. Growing up we had a little shells craft business. My mom used to design necklaces and my dad would be making pendants made of shells. Our life was doing good as I was the only child and both my parents also had a job.

My dad was a carpenter, the best one for that matter while my mom used to work at her Aunt's husband as the secretary of his business.

One day my mom told my dad that she's pregnant and so they started to work more so they could give our needs. My mom dreamed of having a big family before. But then, just like any other people we experienced hardships when my father noticed that his asthma is getting worst. He was not even diagnosed of having one as the doctor mentioned his lungs were clear but then because he used to take over-the-counter drugs advised by my grandmother then he got overdosed. He went in and out of the hospital that swept off their savings plus siblings number 3 and 4 came.

Everything fell down in just a snap.

I was 12 years old, about to graduate in 6th grade when my dad decided to end his misery. From the on, I woke up from a deep slumber of being protected by a strict father and had learned hardship in such an early age.

I experienced working to my Aunt (my mothers cousin) who only give me 75 pesos a day and I would need to work 6 days a week. I was lucky enough that my Mom's brother who was a Seafarer offered to send me to College both my tuition and allowance was shouldered by him. I thought that finally life would be easy but I was wrong because that Aunt to whom I had to get my allowance from sent by my Uncle is very cruel. Our arrangement is I would go to her house every Saturday to get my allowance and my grandfathers support which is given by my Uncle. My Uncle by the way is close to our relatives. He grew up being a "boy" to that relative and he made his way to the top with their support. He supported his parents all the way though but then my grandma has her own favorite child of whom was a black sheep and from there my Uncle lost interest. If I remember it right my Uncle visited my grandma and grandpa only twice of my lifetime. He would come directly to my Lolo's siblings house like they are his family and not us but we were fine with that because it was his choice. The best thing though is that he still has this sympathy over his siblings especially my mom. Whenever we needed money for any emergency cases we can directly run to him.

I can say we became too toxic even when we did not want too. My mom and dad were not even lazy but struggles piled up that my dad committed such a mortal sin of ending his life because he thought that he and him being sick is the reason why we got drawn of debt.

As my journey continued being the eldest with 3 siblings looking up to me I had all the pressure in the world.

I had to ask my Teacher way back in High School if she needs anyone to clean her office at work and just give me at least anything for snacks just to survive a day. I had to sell food and even do projects for my classmates in return of a certain amount just for me to keep going in School.

While my mom was finally able to lend a job as a Janitress.

When finally I graduated, I worked in a BPO company aiming to get a stable job because I only have a year before my brother graduates from High school and enter College.

I was able to help my brother yes but I got drawn to debt supporting him too.

During my working years I had to help my mom to support my family because she only earns less. My 3rd and 4th sibs were malnourished by that time and God knows how I cried to hard when I get them to experience going to Malls and eating Jollibee.

My life continues to be just like that, until I started my own my family. Now, I had to pay more and more bills because my sister is going to College. She is the youngest of us four while my 3rd sib decided to stop after graduating high school and is now working as a warehouse helper in a metal company while my 2nd sib who also graduated from College as Seafarer is working in Interisland.

Life has been tough still because when Typhoon hit our place it ruined everything and again I was back to zero.

I am now having a really hard time paying off debt. I only got the courage until today of calculating it. It seems that all those hardships that I had were not enough that to this day we continuously experience such. Even when I did my best to put up a little business of my own, supported my mom and her live in partner to have their own karenderia. Everything went down.

So far here's my current calculation:

4000 P.O

4000 Sari Store

10000 Home Credit

15000 Aunt

2000 Friend

5000 Friend

A total of 40,000 pesos. These were a couple of years debt already to be very honest. The first two were my mom's but she had me shoulder paying it when I started working. I wanted to pay it one at a time but really, whenever I have the chance something would happen. I never even knew how will I be able to pay for these.

Current Debt

25000 Debt Company- pay 4200 per month

14000 Aunt Friend - pay 3500 per month not started yet

15000 + almost paid 35000 - paying 2000 per week

10000 Brother - needs to pay in full at the end of August this year

20000 Singking fund- paying 4500 per month

2000 Partners brother - pending

10000 Brothers girlfriend (7k long overdue) - pending

3000 Other Brother - pending

A total of 99000.

Those that are tagged as pending I never knew when will I be able to pay it. I have been always short of budget because of unexpected expenses plus my Aunt, my mom's sister is depending on me for our Electricity and Water bill. We are living in a compound like area and we have one meter for both electricity and water bill. We agreed with the payment terms on this but then she has to go home due to a sudden death of her husband. Even before, she failed to pay me on time for her part so I have to find ways in order to make sure we don't get our water and electric disconnected.

Monthly expenses

Water 1500

Electricity 3000

Internet 1700

Food and Needs Budget 10000

My food and other needs budget, mainly focuses for my children's milk and diaper so as other basic needs. Sometimes, I have to also eat something that comforts me. I did my very best really but then I got so tired of fighting this poverty.

Sometimes I get to think of the worst case scenario. I wanted to end everything instead but when I look at my children I feel guilty. Call me irresponsible, brat and other names but God knows how I struggled. You may say I never learned my lesson but then other than being a daughter I am also a sister. I can never turn my back to my family when my mom started to just give all the responsibilities to me.

With getting only 10000-13000 every 15 days I never knew how can I pay everything really. I have been a burden to everyone I know and yes, I even have pending debt to my friends. It hurts whenever I see a post in Facebook that those who do not pay their debts are shameless, those posts that talks about people who are unable to pay because even when it is not directed to me my heart bleeds.

Masakit isipin at tanggapin. Hindi ako tumatakbo sa utang pero wala akong ipambabayad talaga. If only I can surrender myself to the authorities and just pay it for a year or two in jail I will just to really pay off everything but then how about my children? They needed a mom. Paano ba? Gusto ko na mag quit sa work kasi nakakapagod na mag work nang wala naman patutunguhan.

My partner on the other hand does not have a decent job. He tried but got no luck so we decided that I will be the one to work while he takes care of our children. Nakakapagod talaga, whenever I almost resolve one problem may dadating na iba. Patong na problema na di ko alam saan ako tutungo. Paano ba?

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Article: XX as of 7.24.2022

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