Friends with benefit: What if I am not beneficial after days?

The benefit of the doubt sometimes is the one that I considered a friend. Friends are the person whom we shall be with, aside from family some will be there on our side no matter what happens in the future, friends will always be our friends no matter who they are or what they are. But sometimes, we think that some people are just enjoying the benefit of us, then what if there is a point where we are not beneficial to them? What if there is a time when we can not do anything?

In a professionality matter, friends with benefits is somehow a normal thing. Professionally my teacher in college told me I need to be friendly, especially those professionals like me. There will always be the time that I need them either for my career or anything that is personal. That’s what was in my mind until now, I believed him and I think he had a point.

So from that moment, I established my life friend journey. I met several professionals indeed, we talked about life and career. The things that I liked the most with these friends are that they always talked professionally even though we just met somewhere. I always called them Ma’am and Sir. That was normal to me, and so they are.

I also had this personal friend of mine when I was in college. We made a vow, we are five lads in the group and whoever passed the professional exam will be named as “Boss”. I never thought they would do that; actually, within five men only two of us passed the exam yet. So they really called me boss which was sometimes awkward for even being in a public place they were still doing that.

I made friends with professional individuals like my mentor in college told me to, some accountants, engineers, teachers and a lot more field officers, even boss and CEO. Yeah, I am not that parasite who will just come to the feeling close attitude, I prefer that we just meet then comes next time we were talking with each other.

Friends with later benefits, lol.

But the real thing that drives this is that I heard others' stories about their friendships. Just this week I was invited to a birthday party of my Godchildren. It was her 6th birthday, and guess what, I was always present within 6 years.

The birthday girl’s mother was my second cousin but the relationship is more nerve-racking than my real cousins. One of my goals this year is to listen to other stories. I wanted to hear others' thoughts in life and write things about them.

At first, I was shy of course, that was me honestly. They are talking about their friend, she said I already met her somewhere. There was a problem with this girl because she always just found her friends and what were her benefits of being with them.

Like free food when they go on a trip, accommodations and anything. But when they reach out something about her, like when one of her friends whom she owes money will get mad, eventually makes moves to make the friends look like she was the victim.

Seriously, I looked like Marites in that state investigating what was happening in both of them.

In reality, we are all looking for friends with benefits, are you going to someone who has nothing to offer to you? Are you having conversations with someone whom you won't get many things from? Like you need someone who'll come with you to the mall, someone who will hang out with you, someone who could offer what the life meaning was.

We need friends. So why do we need them? Because we wanted benefits and that was given but the term where that friends are no longer beneficial, that's the time where we could see who was the real friend and only friend.

What if I am not beneficial as time goes by? Are you still my friend?

Whoever that could see the future could answer the question, whoever could look at the next thing to happen after so many years and events to happen could make a judgement whom we think our friends forever will prove, whoever could expect nothing for anything we give could have the title of being the real best friends.

Sometimes it is also given that some friends won't last as what we were expecting, that might be the reason why I had trust issues with some people. We could still be friends but what if the mutual benefit is now gone? The friendship could also deteriorate.

Sometimes friends are also an investment in the real world. We invest time to hear those life stories about them, we invest memories that will be harvested as the fruit of rememberings. We invest love for the trust. We gave them those things because we had mutual benefits as friends.

Are you also a future professional? By degree of action? I also wanted to pass you the idea from my mentor in college until now, looking for a friend, the professional or future one, with rank or none, boss or employee, business-minded and farmers mind, for me somehow I learned something from them every time I met them and talked about something.

Friends with benefits are natural, we need them for some information, future reference and help.

In the last pages of the article, those friends that we lost when we were not that beneficial in a few seconds of time, they were not our loss, they are the ones that lost us, thanks for reading…