Serving my Jail Term.

Being incarcerated is something no one wants to experience even if it is for just a week. That is when you will begin to appreciate the freedom you enjoy. Come to think of it, you will be under another person’s control. When you eat, drink, bath and even smile are controlled by someone who doesn’t give a hoot about you. In some cases, you are treated more like an animal. This and many other reasons are why you and I will never want to be jailed even if it is for a day. Here am I bond with chains both hands and legs with no clue of what happens in the world. How did I get myself into this mess? How do I explain the fact that I have never gotten involved in any form of a fight with anybody out there? I thought I have been able to separate myself from anything that could take me to jail? These were the unanswered questions running through my mind since I found myself in jail. No one wants to associate himself with me again because of fear of being arrested since they know that the police are always watching my every move. I am serving a jail term which I could have avoided but I threw away caution in the wind and here am I today with no one to save my poor soul.

It all started the first day I set my foot in that house. I could fight back the feeling but I decided to allow my emotions to control my sense of reasoning. I was warned by my friends who happened to have been in the very spot I now found myself. What else should I call it if not utter foolishness? How could I have been so stupid and senseless? I was thought to learn from the mistakes of others but I threw away wisdom and embraced foolishness. I am left alone to suffer and carry my cross even when it is very clear that I need help. No one wants to lend a helping hand because they all warned me but I did not heed their warnings. The worst part is that my enemies are gracefully rejoicing over my incarceration even those who could not mention my name before now have made my name the spittle inside their mouth. Who will help me? My heart is gradually fading away just like mere dust. I can see the end of my life from where I stand. How did I get to this place?

While I was growing up, I heard so many sweet and wonderful stories about love which convinced me to embrace it with both arms wide open. I thought it was the sweetest thing that can happen to anyone. I thought when a heart finds love it lives even longer than it should. I gave my heart and everything within but what did I get in return, betrayal and wickedness. Who said love is sweet? How can something as painful as love be called sweet? I believe there is a mix up somewhere. My story is that of hopelessness and betrayal both joined together by pretence disguised as love. She walked past me on that faithful day and I lost myself in her. I was told to be careful but I thought they wanted to take away my joy at that time little did I know that they were trying to save my soul. I rushed after her with the speed of lightning hoping that I will get to talk to her. The signs were so glaring because she was so rude and hostile to me, even when it was the first time she was meeting me. I saw it all very boldly written but I chose to act ignorant because of her beauty.

Even when she managed to look at me, I could see her giving me that look that spells doom, I still did not walk away. Who should I blame? Do I blame myself for not listening to the words of wisdom and advice from friends and families? Do I blame myself for getting lost over such a beautiful creature? Or do I blame God for taking His time to create such beauty? Why should I drag God into my mess? I am the one who is to be blamed not God or anybody. She is not even to be blamed because I was the one who rushed after her like a rat that smelled cheese under the table not knowing that it was all a trap. I wish I could turn back the hands of time I will look the other way if I see her walk by. Is there any need to cry over spilt milk? What need are all the tears when I know that I am already in jail with no hope of gaining my freedom any time soon? If this is what love is all about then, hold it because I don’t need it anymore. I wish I could open my eyes to find out that it was nothing but terrible nightmares.

My worst regret is that I was unable to tell the world my story so that a lot of people like me will not fall into her wicked pretentious love which is covered by her beauty. I heard she is hooked up to another victim who will certainly end up in jail like me or even worse. Oh! How I pity him for he does not know what has visited his heart. I will not allow myself to end like this without letting the world know who she truly is. I may be in jail, but I know that I am not dead yet therefore, I will one day tell my story of love to the world and anyone who cares to listen, but for now, I only wish I could wake up from this nightmare I found myself. I am bound with chains on both hands and legs with no single way of getting freed any time soon. Please, help me to escape from this Jail before it’s too late.

NOTE: In case you are in this kind of situation, please, I want you to know that you can always talk to somebody. Don’t die in silence because of love.

Thank you for reading my bull sh**.

Davinchysax love you…

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