Rainbow Memories - Love is like a rainbow but the loss hurts all the same.

William, did you know a rainbow has many colours? I bet you do, you're smart but let me tell you, you've never seen beauty till you seen one of these rainbows. Each colour is as beautiful as the last but all different in their own right, just like us humans, unique. Do you hear me William, are you still listening? Every colour points the same direction -untold riches, and treasures beyond your wildest dreams, yes even yours. A rainbow marks a promise, a testament to divine faithfulness, and a token of hope and of mercy and of love. For this reason, I dedicate every rainbow that may shine to you and to our love.

Do you remember my lipstick that you used to adore, the matt red stain on my lips? Said it brought out my eyes, you did. You were always cheeky back then, you gave me the willies and you sat on the wrong side of my dad but I still loved you and I still do. See I wore that lipstick with pride, I still do, less now though. Oh how you love that red, the deep dark satin. It was sensual blazing red, like our love it was fire. It was passion. Red for our spontaneity, for your impulsive nature and for my love for you. Back when we were young, careless and free.

I have still have that orange dress you know,I was wearing it when you went down on one knee. You were so sweet that day, flowers a lot. I still have it you know. The ring, that shoddy band you bought from the dusty old brokers shop because you were broke, skint. We had no money did we? We made do with what we had, those were good times. I guess money didn't mean as much back then as it does now, our lives revolved around more than bank balances and weekly incomes, we had love and love was enough for us. I still have that dress you know, it lays here collecting dust, not much good it does me. Can't get it round. Hips no more.

Our wedding day was glorious, I was a blushing bride I was, do you remember? Of course you do. You stood there, at the end of aisle, smile on your face as if you'd gone and won the lottery or something of the likes. I smiled all day and so did the sun, it smiled down on us. It blessed our union and blessed it was, that day was magical. I spent ages making them yellow dresses for the girls though but they were hideous! Why didn't you tell me? Now all that remains of them is a great big yellow blot on our wedding photo. It's still here you know. That photo Of us, of the family that day, we were so all happy with that great big sun beaming it rays down us- I must get round to dusting it off. I guess dresses didn't really. Matter that day, we had fun that's what counts and I will remember that day for the rest of my life as one of the best.

Maple street, now that brings back memories doesn't it? That peeling green door that you carried me over- that house was our life, I bet a little bit of us still lives on there. I miss that house, it must miss us too William. You cared for that house. You laboured over every nook and cranny. It was spotless. You cared for that house you cared for us, for me with a heart of gold, a warm heart. Our george was born there. Our child, our son our little bundle of joy, do you remember?

His eyes that day, big orbs searching the world you cried. We both did but they were happy tears, tears joy. When those eyes looked at me the world stopped and I was so proud but so were you. You were the best father a boy could ask for. Even when he was feeling blue you would cheer him right up. You had a gift: you could make blues sound less of a lament and more of heavens chariot anthem. You'd do anything for that boy, he used to peer up at your with those little blue eyes of his and you would make the world stand still if you must. Don't you see? All I'm asking that you to do- come back to me and to george.

Oh William, you're late where are you? Didn't you hear- our george is coming back today? Praise the lord and may he deliver him safely. You have to see him in his beautiful indigo uniform William, he is so smart, guess he takes after his father he does. Shirt buttoned up but those hats, they don't wear them they used to. You'd look so good in uniform William, smart and dapper I reckon. I think you'd suit that look, so. Long as you didn't start talking mind you. That accent of yours would ruin everything. Thank goodness george didn't inherit your voice; I think I would be mortified if my little sailor sounded like us. He's proper posh, I feel like I'm having tea with Queen when he talks. Made common by our son!

George said I should go see you, you know. He sent me violets, said they were your favorite flower that you'd like them and that it would make you happy. He's so thoughtful, it would mean more if you could back to me though you know. If you could just come back home were could share the violets together, they could sit here on the mantel piece- in between our wedding photo and that one of George

I've got the perfect vace in the cupboard but I need you to be here first.

I wish you didn't have to go, I know people think I am fine but I'm not. You just went, you left. Do you hear William; you left me, you left everyone who loved you.

Did I do something wrong?

Im sorry; I'll make it better I swear, I swear on my life, on our love whatever I did I'm sorry. Just please, please come. If not for me, then for George, he didn't do anything. Look I know I didn't do the dishes yesterday and I know I didn't laugh at your jokes but they're not as funny as they used to be but if you came back I'd wash a village full of dishes and laugh to moon and back at your knock-knock jokes. Please I just need you back, back home. We were going to grow old together and now I'm just old and were not together.

Do you remember our vows? I do, but I thought we were stronger than this. I wish I had never said that last line; I sealed our fate when I said those stupid words. You have to come back. Nothing can keep. Us apart. Nothing. No force of heaven, hell or earth. That's what you promised.

You lied otherwise you wouldn't of left me, I don't want to be alone anymore. I tried of walking up in empty bed and and only making one coffee in the morning. When the post is only delivered to me and christmas cards have your surname but not your name, I just want to sit down and cry. I don't want to say goodnight to an empty room or have equally empty condolences from people I don't remember. I want you, not any of this.

Please just come home. The rainbows will guide you, they know where we are and each one marks our love and your promise don't break it, my heart can't take anymore just come home.

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