Some people talk about their success but forget about their failure. Every successful person has undergone several failures and struggles before they reach the top.
You might think that my post today is about success, it is more about failure actually. This post is inspired by @bbyblacksheep with her post, Failure. Thanks for giving me hints.
I just find it more interesting to talk about failure than talking about success. Financially speaking, I am not yet successful. I don’t own a car, I don’t own a house and I don’t even have savings in the bank but I am somehow trying to find ways to deal with these things.
Currently my earnings are set to finances for my kids education and day to day expenses. However I can say that I am already successful in some aspects of life like having healthy kids and having beautiful wife can consider myself successful.
Anyway that was just my intro for this post as success has always twinned with failure.
Back in my school days, I never had a failing mark in my class cards, not even once. I may have lower grades in some subjects but I never had experience of having a remedial class or retake of subjects. In short I never failed my parents with regards to schooling only when I was about to graduate in college.
I thought I could make it to college without disappointing my parents, especially with my mother. It was during the last semester before graduation when I could no longer bear the pressure of surviving to finish the course, and then having difficulty with financial assistance.
I was almost about to give up. Sometimes I would go with my friends from other universities and get drunk. Then I would go home wasted until my mother would be disappointed at me.
One thing that concerned her was that the university was 40 KM far from our home. She was worried I might be messing with other passengers on the bus because I was drunk.
The incident has been repeated several times but my parents don’t mind me. However I still continue going to school and I never skip class although I'm a bit dumb sometimes.
There was one circumstance that my parents, my mother especially as she was the one who was really eager to have her kids educated, felt like I totally failed them.
Four days before the commencement exercises, I met an accident that made my mother's heart really break.
I attended the graduation of a friend from another university. We celebrated and drank as if there was no tomorrow. I was a blind drunk as hell that my friend wasn’t able to manipulate me. I insisted on driving the motorcycle and then boom! In a split second I was lying on the road with a large scar on my left face covered with blood.
I didn’t feel anything like I was hurt physically or something. Maybe because of the high amount of alcohol I consumed that my body was numb to injury.
My friends took me home as I don’t want to be taken to the hospital. They were so embarrassed with my mother as they couldn’t explain that it was all my fault.
My classmates and batch mates were shocked when I attended that graduation with a swollen left face and a large scar. There was also a blood clot on my left eye.
I kept smiling so as not to make them worry but their facial expression was still in awe. Mother was beside me and I know how she felt that day. I can sense her feeling of humiliation because of me but she wouldn’t let it show.
I just realized how hard it was for a mother seeing her child that way. Another child who is seemingly a disappointment for her.
I know my mother had so many questions during those times. A lot of whys and hows.
It was a failure. Failure to comply with the rules. Failure to obey. Failure to be sane and responsible. Failure to know the circumstances before doing an action.
Failure always has a connotation with mistakes. However mistakes can be corrected and forgivable so that we can move on with our life. In the same manner failure needs a second attempt, third and fourth and so on so that we can achieve what we desire.
Failures are always part of our every living. Big or small it is still a failure. Failure to pay the bills or failure to secure electrical devices when leaving home. Even adding too much cream on your coffee is a failure.
As for the failures I have brought to my parents, I made a deal to myself to become a good father when I already have my own family. With my parents knowing this I am certain that somehow I make up things with them by showing that I can raise my kids with good character.
But one day I know things will happen again. I know that one of my kids will disappoint me in the future. Life is a series of unexpected failures. We just have to be strong enough to face it.
Thanks for reading. Ciao!
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Thank God that nothing super serious happened to you. Naalala ko yung dating workmate ko with regards sa motor and inom. Back ride siya and lasing sila pareho as in lasing. Di ko masyado alam details pero nadala pa daw sa ospital and lumaban kaso di rin kinaya. 😭 tapos yung nagddrive balita ko nagtago na. Pero kasabihan din kasi dito sa atin di ba kapag maggraduate na malapitin sa disgrasya?
Anyway, success naman ang pinublish ko kagabi. Hahaha. Syempre after failure ay success. I agree that life is a series of unexpected failures and we have to learn from those.