Bullying and You

Firstly,I would like to thank @Dolores for making me this beautiful header. She does this in her interactive articles to promote healthy and non-toxic interaction in her articles

@z_graeden once again. Coming to you with a topic above mentioned .It's a long read, just as usual like my other articles because I like to go in details. Am a mother of 3 kids and I also have a fair share of being bullied and becoming a bully.

What is bullying?

Bullying is when one person or a group intentionally hurt or harm one person or a group who feel helpless to respond. The former abuses one whom he sees doesn't fit in.Bullying may also be caused by race, religion, place of work and/or students new to school or an environment.

This repetitive, aggressive,habitual behavior comes in many forms such as physical, verbal, emotional, relational and cyberbullying. That's why, as parents out there we should be alert when our kids are being bullied or a bully as this may caused emotional and mental health issues on the long run.

For elementary aged children and highschoolers, they are more prone to bullies older than them or those feel more superior than them. Bullying happens more inside the classroom and the school premises..

To name from physical bullying, this includes hitting, kicking,pushing,stealing ones posession or just by hiding it, extortion of money, breaking one's things and making fun of others.

While emotional bullying includes name calling, teasing, embarassing, insulting or mean words and anything that is considered verbally abusive.

Moreover, relational bullying is somewhat related to emotional bullying as it is not visible.The bully can lie about doing such thing thus, making this type of bullying the most neglected. It is more on student friendship.This includes spreading rumors about their friend/s, excluding him/her on participating such gatherings or outings, refusing to talk to him/her without apparent reason/s and other things that might destroy a relationship.

Due to today's era-computer age and the influence of technology , from children to adults or anyone having access to gadgets and internet cyberbullying existed and sprung to life. It is more dangerous than the rest forms of bullying for even on the comfort of one's home he can still receive bullying..It is bullying from emotional and relational bullying in the form of text messages, emails, posting false statements and pictures about someone on social media. It is the most dangerous form of bullying as it can happen 24hours of the day and/or longer and anywhere.Worst part is that you don't know who is targeting you as people who do so goes anonymous.

Bullying causes one especially those who are far more emotionally vulnerable to feel distress, anxious about the next move of the bully, lower self esteem and self worth, depression and others are also suicidal. People who get bullied asked themselves what's wrong with themselves; honestly, there is nothing wrong with you. It is the bully who has some underlying emotional issues that includes lack of attention from their family, or family infuence(it is not taught but something they witness inside the house).

Additionally,change in behavior of a child who is suffering bullying outside the house is obvious as they may not socialize anymore, even with families. They get uneasy upon going online.Kids or students just drop from school. If you see something even the slightest sign of behavioral changes in your kids,talk to them nicely until they spill what's bothering them..

Me, myself is a victim of bullying since elementary days yet I just considered it normal and never tell my parents about it. I had to deal with it alone, "children are children" thought because bullying is not yet known before.

It got worse on my secondary days especially during my first year on a big highschool establishment in town. Maybe because majority of the students are from that town and am just from a village, bullies are more of boys. One would just snatch my paper while am writing, they call me names, one would just pull my ponytailed hair from behind and unexpectedly lifting it up causing pain on the lower back part of the head.

On my second year in highschool, one threw a chewed ball of paper inside my blouse, I felt humiliated the worst and "nabastusan aq masyado" that I had to stand,face him and punch his nose real hard. That's the time bullying declined, coz I turned into a bully. Nevertheless, I realize it's not good for me so I began to go back to the usual me.

I can say that bullying can either make or break a person but the latter is usually the effect. So,this kind of behavior should not really be something to be tolerated. And bullying has a legal process of dealing with it.

I know everyone here experienced being bullied or once a bully.Being the bullied, how did you act on it? How did you overcame the result? As a bully once or before, how did you stop doing it?

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