Why being a people pleaser is the same as being a slave

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2 years ago

Some of us are particularly sensitive to others’ opinions and go far to earn a single word of praise. Essentially, we are so desperate that we would tie ourselves into a double bow to fit in what others’ expectations might possibly be. We ignore our needs to the point of losing who we are. We are begging for approval and acceptance. This is rather common in people with ADHD. There is a medical term “reaction sensitive dysphoria” for the extreme form of people-pleasing where negative feedback makes the ground below our feet crumble and throws us into a depressive episode. We are allowing others to determine the direction of our lives. Isn’t this the definition of slavery? Just that it is self-inflicted, willing slavery.

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Comments

The problem with people who please others is mostly fear. Fear of being judged, fear of loosing someone or people's attention. When they get over that fear, they break free

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2 years ago

I completely agree. Getting over the fear is an immense challenge. It can be as strong as a phobia.

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2 years ago

Exactly, getting over fear takes a lot of work. But is better to go through it and gain freedom.

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2 years ago

Yes, exactly. Freedom is a great reward.

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2 years ago

I like. the fact that you call it a reward. It truely is because having an independent mind and doing what you want to do provided it's not hurting anyone is the beauty of life.

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2 years ago