"Calm heart in the hot sun"

"Calm heart in the hot sun"

“Depression in the characters of the poem

I am very upset about the words today

How long have you been missing?

Hiding in the land of the stars to peek into my heart

What a joke you are sitting!

When you are gone, why not go at all?

Do I need to search too much sometimes?

Don't you want to plunge me into more loneliness?

..................................

............ "

I couldn't finish writing. Prakhar Ahmed Surya. Meghla's grandfather. Although not a sibling, they live at home as well. But since childhood they have been involved in such a way.

Sitting in a cloudy chair, he is constantly shaking his hand. Joe is not listening to him. Thousands of news can be heard from him in the whole area. That is why people call him BBC. He also does not have a difference of opinion. Rather, the name seems to have happily taken over. It is the same as it was in the bed.

Due to the cloudy weather, Budd is annoyed more and more. Strong very serious nature. Sometimes I sit down to write because I want to. And the limitation of this writing is only his own diary. Who knows if he writes very well. Meghla is the only reader of his writing. Meghla does not understand hundreds of writings. Still, Grandpa, why aren't you publishing a book? Laughs out loud and says crazy, do I write for printing or not! I write for myself. I'll let you read a little because you insist.

Four years bigger than a strong cloud. After the separation of the parents, the death of the mother has caused great pain to the 4-year-old. After that he grew up in his grandfather's house in a kind of loneliness. It was as if he was always in a trance. But he was very affectionate towards Meghla. After the birth of Meghla, Meghla started coming to his house. He wanted to take Meghla in his lap and caress her a little. No one wants to give it to him for fear. But the evil cloud will go to the strong. Pulling her hair, pinching her nose and eyes. She likes all this very much. She takes Meghla very close. But it is not possible to understand whether it is like a younger sister or something different.

They continue to grow. Once upon a time, growing up was like being intense. Something he wants to write for himself. The clouds have grown. This naughty girl rubbed her ears a thousand times and said, "You have grown up a lot this time. I will not come here again." He sat down with a diary. Read one poem after another For those who have an idea about poetry, these may not be in the middle of poetry, but the writings are poetry to Meghla. All separation.

1. "The trick is to play hide and seek in the river full of Shawn months

And how much will drown me?

I don't know how to swim, girlfriend

How can I save you if you suddenly fall into the current?

.............................

............................ "

2.

"I am alone

Very lonely

Tired train

Suffering from shortness of breath

Anonymous is a disease

Swallowing me.

Budd is giving pain to the inside.

This is not a common disease

This is the disease of not getting anyone.

But how much I need him now.

...................... "

The eyes that were removed a few seconds ago from the diary are now sharp. As if he was lying in bed like before, he was arranging his own words.

Grandpa, tell me what you write? Why do you write so much separation? With a smile on his face and suspicion in his eyes, he sat down and said, "Are you scorched, Grandpa."

After listening to him, he leaned back on the pillow and looked at Meghla and said, "Damn, crazy. Do people express their separation just by burning? There are so many more pains hidden in people's lives. So I read this. I will understand when I grow up. How difficult life is. Those childhood events have made this boy a little too big to study. Meghla doesn't understand at all. Nowadays, he wants to match the rhythm. He writes on paper,

“I’m busy too

Don't be silent "

He writes something like this and shows it to Prakhar. Wow, it's great, he's crazy --- he says with a keen eye. It doesn't make sense to say that he acts brilliantly or to give encouragement in his mouth or in the language of his eyes. Meghla's eyes brightened with the joy of being able to do something. He keeps trying to write.

Gradually the intense admission test came into play. He was admitted to a varsity. This is the first time it has moved away from the clouds. And over time, that is likely to increase. As the days go by, it becomes as if it has become unrecognizable. It becomes a completely different forest. It doesn't talk like before, it doesn't inquire. It is as if it has become intense. Meghla can say something even if it is moving forward, but it seems that Prakhar is ignoring him in some way. Only his eyes got wet with water.

Meghla feels very lonely nowadays. It seems that no one is with him. The disease of loneliness swallows him too. And in any case, he can not tolerate the intense neglect at all. Nowadays, his inclination towards writing has increased a lot.

Writing on the diary page,

"Will you be a tear in my unwritten poem?"

What did you write for the purpose? What do you know? Is the cloud crushed in the chest of neglect and weakening towards the strong? But no. Prakhar is forever and brother, very close people have thought. Prachanda loves him very much. But there is no different emotion between him.

Standing in the scorching sun today, what are you thinking ....

As soon as Meghla's eyes fell on him through the window, some words were running through his mind .....

"You are very anxious to burn in the hot sun

Seeing him standing inside my chest

The poem of separation runs away.

Seeing you standing like that with a sad face

I am in great pain

What a little trouble to hold on to your chest

Will you give it to me? "

Meghla is now in college after school. Her inclination towards writing has increased a lot. She became very friendly with a boy for the sake of writing. Although the boy does not write, he can be called a devoted reader. If you see the attitude, you will feel crazy. The hair is uskokhusko, the lips have become black after burning cigarettes. The boy looks very beautiful with a shy smile. His name is Roddur. Roddur Ahmed Akash.

It seems that he has been able to occupy the strong place even if it is a little bit. Or to put it another way, Meghla voluntarily gave her place to Roddur. Maybe to reduce the pain a bit. Meghla has never been able to accept such a drastic change in a hurry. She doesn't even know why it happened like this. It was only through one person that he knew that he might love someone on campus. I like that girl's recitation very much.

Diameter, that's all? Meghla is ignoring so much? Meghla never told him where, Meghla loves Prakhar! But why is he doing that.

Is love the name of denying or rejecting another existence by grabbing someone?

A boy named Hridoy has been following him since class nine. He has no idea how much he has explained to the boy. When he says something, he says, "I'm not walking along your road anymore." Meghlar is very upset. The boy often follows him to college and also follows him on his way back from college. What an annoying situation! He seems to be a genius. However, seeing him constantly following her for so many years, Meghla seems to have a little love for him. Sometimes the boy peeks into Meghla's small heart and runs away. Maybe he wants to take a little place in his mind.

But Meghla's mind is no longer like a stone. He himself does not know or understand what he wants.

Roddur does a lot of research these days. Talking to Roddur, I know why Meghla doesn't feel very alone. Do you think he fell in love with Roddur? Does he want to get a little closer to Roddur? Nowhere. He never thought so.

Nowadays, it is not possible for Meghla to understand whether Prakhar is not remembered very much or whether he has locked the door of his mind on purpose. He has always known himself with keen eyes. Did he want to notice himself?

When he came home on holiday, he saw Anamna Prakhar. It was as if the boy was getting bored, smoking cigarettes. As if he is not even in the middle of himself. For whom does he want to end himself? Why is he in so much pain?

Going to think, I know why Meghla took her eyes away from him with a little pride.

7 have been admitted to varsity after passing Meghla College He has a good friend there. His name is Shant. I know why Meghla always chooses boys when choosing close friends. It may seem that he can't trust the girls very much. But in fact it is not. If he had revealed his identity, he would have needed faith for the privacy of his words. But he does not want to reveal his identity to anyone. Still restless, the storm of his own words tossed his body and fell there. He didn't tell anyone. Maybe she feels a different attraction towards boys because she knows Prakhar from a young age. That is the only friendship. You don't have to say this anymore.

After going to varsity, Roddur increases his communication. Maybe he likes him. One day while walking like this, he hurriedly informed me about his thoughts by writing a message.

"And how long will it take you to write me?"

That's the diameter. Clouds that make sense. Just wants time. A lot more time. Waiting for the sun.

I don't want to wait to tell the truth for someone who is hoping to get it, but I have to wait to get it forever.

That is why Roddur is waiting. The boy in the heart also sometimes presents himself in front of Meghla with a kind of sense of entitlement.

Meghla desperately wants someone to show her a right over him. Too much right. As if standing on thousands of fences, not a single step away from his sense of entitlement. She wants to get such a boy as her life partner. Terribly. That will be able to overcome the silence of her loneliness.

He wants to love such a boy very much. He also wants someone to bother him. But he does not know who this person is or whether he will meet that person at all.

From there, Roddur seems to be a little fit. He can't wait any longer. Still waiting a few more days. In the end, he consulted with his close friend Shantar and decided to agree. The phone call of the heart at that moment is the day to be informed. He said in a very tearful voice, "Mother is no more. I know why today I feel very lonely. I love you in this world too. So I miss you so much today. Leave? "

He has never had any bond with his heart, in which case the question of leaving is not known, Meghla. At least in such a situation, there is no point in making a mistake. Meghla somehow calmed down and left the phone. He doesn't talk to Roddur.

When asked calmly just say -----

"You see, there's no such thing as loving someone so much as ignoring them."

In the meantime, one day a message came from an unknown number on Meghla's phone. He didn't notice it at the beginning because he didn't have the phone. He took the phone in his hand and saw it sent at least 15 minutes ago. Message text:

"When you read my message, maybe I'll fight to the death in a hospital bed. What's the point of trying to live for the last time? You know, my lungs have succumbed to cancer a long time ago. If you play it will be like this.

I've been very arrogant, haven't I? I haven't talked to you in years, I haven't talked. You know, I've been looking for you all these years, but I've got it right. I just did not have the courage to stand in front of you. I thought how to tell you the words, so I did not say. But today I have no hesitation to say. So I ignore all the hesitations and say, "I fell in love with you for a while. You were barely there then. What do you think of me? How much can I keep you well? Or why should I just drag you into my lonely life I didn't want to think about it, I wanted to move away from you. But if you want to move away, can you go any further? It was growing. The acquaintances did not even hear how much the doctor forbade it. When I saw you from a distance, a low sigh would poison my insides. The effect of the poison was like this again.

"I want to see love better."

There is a sound of sitting on the bed The phone has fallen out of his hand. He doesn't notice it. Everyone wants to know the story behind the tears. But today he is no longer in his own midst.

Even when he came at the end, he seemed to ignore him terribly.

A few days have passed but Meghla's depression has not yet subsided. How many times has Roddur tried to communicate but Meghla did not communicate intentionally. Just wrote in the message,

"I never understood the heart of the person who was supposed to have a place in my heart. I have neglected it all my life. I don't want to ignore it anymore than to understand someone's heart anew. Be good like you."

A few days later, an acquaintance said that Roddur had left the country in silence. I know what!

Finish