How can divorce affect children? We as parents are prepared to help them overcome the separation?
When we make the decision to start a family, we never think that at some point it may fracture and end in separation, our children being the most affected in this process.
Three of every five couples who divorce have children. This separation represents a difficult experience for the children, as it involves a series of drastic changes, among which are the most important refuge: the family; suffer the request of a close relationship with some of the parents; having to answer cheeky questions from colleagues, neighbors, and friends. The mother, who is usually the one who takes charge of the situation, must help her children to get ahead in the best way.
To help children it is important to recognize some of the symptoms of discomfort and grief that they may be suffering. In general, the symptoms that the smallest ones present is depression, which manifests itself through loss of appetite; they also become unhealthy (fevers, colds, vomiting, etc.), or suffer from nervousness (hyperactivity, rebellion, or uncontrollable tantrums), to name a few of the changes.
In adolescents there is a loss of the ability to concentrate to study, insomnia, isolation, excessive dependence, increased appetite, anxiety, sexual promiscuity, running away from home or even thinking about suicide.
Of course, each case is an isolated whole and must be treated as such. When there is a separation process, it is very important to gain the child's trust and be his friend or friend in those moments since it is of great help to face these changes in the best possible way.
Tips:
To reduce the tension of the children, it is important to explain to them that their relationships as a family have not ended, they are simply changing, but mom and dad still love them very much and will always be with them to support them.
If the changes in the attitude of your children are very radical, it is recommended that you visit a specialist. But you can help him a lot by following these tips:
Explain that he is not the cause of the divorce.
Make friends with him and become his friend and confidant. When they have gained their trust, encourage them to vent, to feel safe crying, talking, and expressing their sadness. Let him know that it is natural for him to feel this way.
Don't change your family routine right away. Try to keep up with normal activities.
Look for opportunities for your children to be with their father, let them share with him. What's more, help make those occasions joyous and joyous.
Try not to fight with your ex-spouse. Never get upset or criticize him in front of his children. Remember that even if she is no longer your husband, she is still the father of your children.
If possible, do not move house as this represents too drastic a change for the children. It involves adjusting to a new neighborhood, friends, schools, etc.
Share with your child. Don't miss a single opportunity to reaffirm your love for her. A kiss, a pat on the back… they make him feel loved. Be with him as long as possible without overprotecting him, make him feel safe, loved, dear.
See the future with confidence and optimism. Help your child have an enthusiastic outlook on life, too, without fear.
When the decision has been made to initiate a separation process, the parents should be responsible for explaining to the children according to their age the decision that is being made and why, without this being found out by third parties and may cause them confusion to the children.
Main Image Source:https://www.abc.es/familia-padres-hijos/20150427/abci-madre-quatar-hijos-201504011031.html
It's actually a tricky works..it takes lots of responsibilities. You covered it so good. Thanks for sharing such a informative article