Disappointment, How Do You Deal With It?
How do you deal with disappointments? Do you cry? vent out? Do you use any creative outlets? When your friend or loved ones' action got you disappointed, what do you do?
Some people usually ask why I build walls around me and why I use bardagulan to cope with whatever I'm feeling, whether I'm happy or sad, or if I really wanted to cry, jokes and humour never fail to be my companion.
Everybody's not entitled to know what I'm feeling. Not everybody's entitled to know what's happening in my life. It's a kind of privilege I give only to the people I trust.
I really don't know the answer to the question of why I'm building walls around me not until I encountered this situation. Recently, I discovered that one of my trusted friends, let's call her Lia, shared my personal life stuff with another person, without me knowing.
When I shared with you my personal life stuff, my emotions, what I felt at a certain moment, it means that I trust you enough. I don't usually share random stuff about myself unless it's from my blogs. I just knew that Lia told others what I had shared with her when my other friend, Jennie, heard it.
Jennie, as a concerned friend, told me about this. It was just heartbreaking to know that someone you trust can break your heart.
What did I feel? Disappointed.
Jennie asked if I was mad.
I wasn't. I was just disappointed. It takes courage for me to trust someone about my personal life and this is what I've got, coming from the person I trust.
My heart aches for the disappointment I've felt. That's when I knew the reason why I keep building walls around me. This is what I've got after opening up to other people. This is what I've got after trusting them.
At the moment, I don't know what to feel or how to act around Lia. Should I confront her? Should I tell her I'm disappointed? But for what? The damage has been done and my trust has been broken.
I know it would take time to process what happened and to fully recover from a broken trust. This is another lesson learned.
Should I keep building walls around me to protect myself? Maybe.
April 05, 2023
Sources of disappointments lingers around, it's inevitable. Me? I cope up differently, depends kung anong klase ng disappointment 'yung na-encounter ko. But most of the time? Either I vent out or find outlets to divert my attention. Ayun, always namang effective.
What happened between you and Lia is one of the reasons why I keep many things privately. Not that I have trust issues, nag-iingat lang at iba na mag-isip mga tao nowadays. Somehow, nakakatakot 'yung fact that they can destroy us using our own stories.