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As we grow up, we are warned about many issues and guided about how we should behave. We learn what we need to do to be successful, to avoid attracting attention, to avoid the gang of evildoers talking behind our backs: to be like a girl, to look like a boy, to fit in. We get hurt: When our family doesn't see us, our teacher doesn't hear us, our friends don't like us, we get hurt deeply and we start to hide and collect these wounds that we have no idea about. Each wound is recorded with one or more emotions.
Feelings. We have a childhood that we learned almost nothing about growing up, and even if we did, we learned to hide them in the best way possible. Most of us. The transformation in one of us is healing for all of us, but how can the feelings hidden in one of us not hurt us all? Especially when we encounter death, we stuff feelings that we don't even know the name of in the bleeding wounds. We know neither death nor mourning. We have learned to get rid of everything as soon as possible, to hide tears, to escape from grief.
The first days after the city earthquake passed with fuss, hopeful waiting and support for aid campaigns. While waiting for the news that the people under the rubble, the pets that lost their families, will continue to live in health, some people continued to share joyful and entertaining posts on their social media accounts as if this pain did not exist. Some were angry at this, some claimed it was their right, some cared nothing. There are moments in life when we don't judge things on a personal basis, rush for support for someone else, or withdraw into our own centre. Maybe I should say there was, because now we are trying to move on with life in a hurry, without noticing these undeclared “mourning” that we share with others. As if nothing has happened.
It is the work of the heart.
We say wise functionality is mostly pacified
For this human love
lyrical love totally
wisdom and knowledge
three trinity of faith
It is a must.
In human love, lovers are always defeated in the war with their irrepressible lust and luscious powers.
In a little while they are willingly defeated voluntarily
Events and events support this thesis.
They sink into deep, subtle issues.
It is evidence that the mind falls into a functional defect in human love.
Making the most unlikely decisions in matters of LOVE was not a proof of the intoxication of love.
You know, we used to say that love is a mind job?
look it's not
But the mind is not the same, of course, the mind is not the chief, it is the assistant to the soul.
The other day, I focused my attention on the topic of "grief" on the occasion of a post and because of the appropriateness of the agenda, I thought long and hard about mourning, got emotional and gathered information. The sociological and psychological reasons that cause this are the subject of another article, even other specialties, but for a while we started to live by doing our best to escape from the pain. We do our best not to respect the death and pain of others, but to ignore and ignore our own pain. We want to live our life as a ball of "positive" and "exuberant" emotions, we become "down" at the slightest event. Our distance from our own feelings also creates an indifference towards the feelings of others. Is it possible to embrace someone else with compassion when we are blind to our own pain and mourning?
I know, in order to be able to hug someone else with compassion, I first need to learn and practice how to hug myself with compassion. Astrologically, we are in a time of great farewells, both collectively and individually. One by one we lost the things we held on to, the ones we thought were the reason for our existence, the ones we said "I can't live without" How can we open up space for the new, the potential, our dreams, without mourning these losses and accepting their absence? Therefore, I would like to close this article with a call that I hope will be very good for you: Please allow yourself to grieve.
Whatever you lost, what you couldn't do, who you had to say goodbye to, what you missed, take them with you and write a letter of mourning. If you feel the need, your tears will meet with you for all the feelings you can't express. As long as you don't run away from the feeling, create a space for yourself to stay with this pain. If you can create space for your own pain, you don't need to comfort yourself when someone else is going through great pain and you can be a partner in their grief. Man is the home of man; We need to be accompanied by our laughter and our tears.
Compassion (metta) meditation can do you good to open up space for yourself and your emotions. You can search the internet for this meditation or follow the directions in the Heart of Buddha book. There are many different methods of meditation and compassion in the book. Close your eyes, take a few breaths to bring your attention to your body and find silence in your mind. And then, show yourself compassion by saying the following sentences:
let me be happy.
I'll be fine.
Let me be kind.
May I be in peace and security.
And if you want to include others in this compassionate field, they may be your loved ones or those you do not deem compassionate, you can repeat for them:
May you be happy.
May you be in peace and security.
The old world is dying, we need mourning. Our old selves are dying, mourning is at hand. I know you need to feel something again now. Come on, don't ignore, delay, run away.