These days I have been reading many topics related to people's feelings and ways of being, characters that we see daily in family friends and co-workers.
One of the biggest flaws we have as imperfect human beings is to judge others. It’s as if we were excluded from the judgments that they could also make about us. It’s not that it’s wrong for us to make judgments, because one of the ways we have to get to know people is to try to elucidate their personality.
But from there to taking it to the judgment and destructive criticism by the simple fact that it proceeded or proceeds in a different way to us is another thing, because then we are assuming that others with their different behaviors are abnormal and we are the only normal ones.
Over time I have come to understand that people have different ways of relating to others without it meaning that they are sick people, abnormal, strange, or whatever adjective our brain wants to give them. We are just the way we are, as simple as that.
Differences make us unique, we are all the same if we refer to anatomy and physiology but if we go further to personalities, we are all different. Not strange, not weird, just different and accepting people's differences is what makes us mature.
Put destructive criticism aside. Personal criticism to learn to differentiate is normal, what is not normal is the criticism that puts at risk the integrity of an individual whom we have not learned to respect as he/she is.
It’s different when you meet a person who is your friend. You accepted him as he was but suddenly his behavior towards you is different, he/she does things or says expressions that you didn't know about, that's when we wonder why that person is acting differently than what is common to observe in him or her.
I have read about some people who say that we all tell lies, that we are all envious, that we all have flaws. It’s normal for a person to tell lies to defend themselves, but when the lie becomes a habit that’s when it’s not right to keep doing so.
It is normal to feel envious of people in some opportunities, what is not normal is if we always do it with every achievement of the people we have around us. I have heard my friends say that they feel a healthy envy.
You could say that it is the envy that causes your friends and acquaintances to have a bit of luck, that they have obtained a raise or that they have won something in a game of chance… What is not well seen is that every time you see a person's progress you feel frustrated and want to say that you deserve it more. We must stop comparing ourselves with others so as not to fall into unhealthy envy, I was saying this to my friend Ruffa.
It is good to be honest. It is good for people to see how we are. If we find something that is not ours and we return it… do we keep it? Because no one is looking at us... we can do it, no one will accuse us!
…But to have a clear conscience you must go and look for the owner of what you have found. But you are an honest person and with integrity?
Honesty and integrity do not mean that they are hand in hand, because we can be honest but not be of integrity.
We are honest when we find something that is not ours and we want to give it back, someone can see us and we must show that we care about others and do good.
But it's the same when you find something and nobody looks at you, you are alone, do you keep it because no one sees you? Or do you decide anyway to look for the one who might have misplaced something important? If you do it then besides being honest you are a person of integrity.
Because it’s not only good to do good things when we are seen by others, but also when no one sees us. Because it’s our own mind who can accuse us and that is the worst punishment for our peace of mind.
With all this I want to say that we can be as we are, as we want to be, we are imperfect human beings who make mistakes, in different ways, and we can be better no matter who sees us, but only for our personal growth and without making strict judgments of others, learning to respect our differences and learning to be better human beings as we evolve.
I am a very different being in this world, I have had to leave behind all these defects with which I lived for a long time. Now I am living a better stage of my life… Trying to live better with myself and letting others live as they are.
This is not a criticism of anyone, just my thoughts, and the way I am looking at life at this age...
Thanks to all my readers and sponsors, I love you all equally. I love reading all of your articles, even if you are neither my sponsors nor my sponsored.
The earlier we realize we are all different and with different perspective, the best we can be. We are who we are and we are what we are. We can decide to be better and not, it's all depends on what we have chosen to be.