Being accepted is a very good motivation to move forward in life. But why is it that we have to feel that we are accepted by others?
With acceptance we feed our ego and we feel that we are well.
We are part of a community and when we know that we aren’t accepted for whatever peculiar reason in life, we feel displaced. We minimize ourselves.
We may feel displaced because of our own thoughts and not because we really are, our unfounded fears, our own beliefs, our way of being with others, can cause us to not feel good about ourselves and reflect that on others.
It’s when we think that we aren’t valued for who we are. It may be that the answer is very clear, and it’s ourselves who don't appreciate our own person and instead think that this is how others see us.
Of course, there are situations where the community doesn’t really accept their neighbors or their acquaintances because the individual has certain characteristics in his personality, in his behavior or in his way of being that is really taken into consideration by those around him, but this is not the most common of cases.
What is a reality is that our self needs the approval of others to feel that we are useful or that we are truly valued and accepted as people. Otherwise our mind plays an important role in negative feedback that will not strengthen the expected feeling from others.
Very often do we fail to change the way we are treated by others and this can lead to two things…
The first one is to be content with what happens and accept it because nothing can be done to change it.
The other thing that can happen is that the individual tries to modify his behavior in a positive way in order to change something in the environment that is altering his personality.
Trying to change things is a way to learn, and so is accepting reality because in many opportunities we cannot change all the things that happen around us. Trying to be happy with what we have is also part of our acceptance.
I think that the most important thing is to gain experience in our environment, to learn how to be able to get ahead of the incorfomities that we have.
Trying to change our lifestyle so that others notice that we are interested in having a good relationship with them can help us to make these changes to be seen in a better light.
Somehow, if we can be well seen we can begin to feel better with the acceptance we receive from others.
But if we want, and we can, to leave things as they are and learn to live with what we have then that is also a part of life.
But sometimes trying to bee seen by others and have our efforts be appreciated doesn’t exactly turn out the way we want. In that case we can turn the page, leave things as they are and begin to learn that not all the time things can happen as we wish. Sometimes things are the way they are and neither our efforts nor the changes we make can help us feel appreciated.
Life is constantly changing and learning to manage our own life allows us to move forward and value ourselves regardless of what others see in us.
It’s better that we are the ones who learn to value and accept ourselves as we are in order to be happy in life.
I agree people always desire to be accepted but its sad to change ourselves and sometimes look like a fake in our pursuit to be accepted. I would try to be myself, the world is big enough to meet people who can accept us.