a journey of a daughter

In my 36 years of existence in this world, I had been in different places a journey that gave me a lot of lessons and memories that I will treasure until the last breath of my life. I will write an article about my journey in this world because for me it is never-ending lessons on how we can forgive, make good things for others, and how self-love is very important. I will start my journey as a daughter.

I was born on June 25, 1984, as I saw on my birth certificate it was 10 pm. It sounds crazy but every time I remember my birthdate I got so emotional to remember all the heartaches I had experienced in life. Not just like typical parents who are excited to see their born child it's on the other side. When I am 18 years old, that is the only time that I saw my mother. Most of my relatives told me bad things about my mother, but I am blessed that I have my father on my side until 5 years old. I t was heaven for me as I remember those times that he carried me in his back when we are in Baclaran, we went to mass and roamed around and bought me a lot of toys especially barbies.

It was the most precious moment I had with my father he was young then but he carried me to make me feel that I am much secured with his attention and that is the first time I felt secured and loved. I can barely remember those time I had him while he was in his friends gathering all of his friends adore me and call me "beauty" He was my king at that time and I am his princess he treat me like a princess, all those nights that I am sick he is in my side but it did not last long when I am 6 years old my grandmother decided to gave me with her sister that is one of the saddest parts of my life, they taking me away from my father, they thought that it was the best for me.

The journey of a lonely daughter begins.

It was the worst feeling that I had felt at that time, I can barely recall that I hold in the bars of the window so that they can't take me and scream as hard as I can and my father is not there that time and it breaks my heart. As the days go by loneliness is driving me crazy. when I am in high school I committed suicide most of the time because I really can't express the sadness I had in my heart, my father will just visit me once a year. I really don't have friends because after school I went home and that is my life until college.

I am an obedient daughter that time all I had to do is to follow all their instructions for they said that is for my own good. I studied too hard in college without friends my seatmate is my friends after school going back again to a lonely house. That house for me is very lonely we are just two in the house when someone will look at the house it was beautiful for them but it was so empty for me. It was spacious with 3 rooms beautiful living rooms full of appliances and a dirty kitchen with a wide back yard full of plants but it was nothing for me that time. It felt that I was there to obey everything that they said. Until I graduated and pass the board exam it is such an accomplishment for me and a reward for all the good things that they had done with me.

At the time that I graduated my father is not there because his auntie doesn't want him to be with me. I was so depressed at that time but he told me that he is so proud of me.

This is just part 1 of my journey as a daughter. In this part I must say that not all child is given a chance to be with their parents, as much as possible we must be grateful enough to all the blessings that our creator gave us, we might feel depressed for all the challenges in life but we must not forget that we are all here in a journey that our ending is out of our sight that's why we must have the courage to live each day as it is our last.