“It Always begins with Ourselves”

Overthinking, it's a very unhealthy trait that I, unfortunately, have. And every time I came across this, my whole mood was turned upside down. I used to think of things that have never happened yet. Making and building conclusions that turned out into negative thoughts rather than positive ones.

I'm a person who always writes down about positivity, yet, suffering from negativity for days. I'm just a human after all, but that's not an excuse, I guess.

I've faced my worst enemy again, no other than, myself. I am supposed to be the one who must think that things won't fall into places just like what I've wanted to happen. That there are things which are out of my control. And these negative vibes hindered me from appreciating my very “own” progress.

There are a lot of things I'm facing every day, yet those were all part of my reality, part of the real world I'm in. No matter how hard we try to ask for sunshine every day, it isn't possible. We all have to face the gloomy days to appreciate the sunshine we used to have. There is a time where you want to exert your full energy and efforts to make something remarkable, yet, it fails in the end. Things won't always turn out at our will, that's reality. But keep in mind that without failure and slipping, you won't reach a successful destination. But you need to learn from it, don't just make it a pure downfall. Use it as a tool to move forward with a better vision and broader understanding of yourself and your purpose.

These past few days, I struggled with criticism from my “own” self.

What am I doing? Should I call this growth, progress?

Questioning my capabilities and capacity as an individual, by reaching a certain goal. I'm close to my goal, yet, I became too far again to reach it. I faced bumps and humps and slowly making missteps. I can't even make quality content, make time on noise.cash, and always gets disappointments for not making any improvements. However, I forgot one thing, and it is to believe and put trust in myself. And besides, I almost forgot that we're still in the 2nd month of the year, I have so many months left to fulfill my goal. I shouldn't hurry myself and put too much pressure and be mindful that it will just give me stress if I do so.

Thanks to the kind people I met in noise.cash, even though we're completely different in nationality, country, timezone, and beliefs, they sent me warm words to keep track and regain my sanity.

“Wake up, don't let it ruin and stunted your growth. You can do it.”

I whispered to myself, I need to keep going, stay focused, and get back that enthusiasm, I have a mission, and to achieve it, I need to work for it full of trust and determination. Words aren't enough, it needs full action. Finally, my sanity is up and recharged!

It's time to face the reality again!

Pause, that's what I did since I'm uncertain, doubtful, and in distress. It's alright and best to pause and stop for a while when a time comes where you are quite worried about things and not certain about some matters. As I've said, we don't always have sunshine, there'll be gloomy and dark days to test your strength and power as a person. Taking a pause isn't quitting or resigning completely. It's just taking extra time to know yourself better and your purpose. And if you fail, you can always try again, there's no need to quit. You can always start again, there is no limit, all you need is you, yourself.

I realized to appreciate my efforts of the steps I made. Refreshed me and let it cool down for a moment. Learn to take things easy and don't stress out too much. There's always a time for everything and we can't control everything on our palms. Also, I thought about reflecting on my actions. And what I am showing is the reflection of my choices and actions. Since I thought about negativities lately, that's what I earned, a bunch of negativity. Why not stop saying I hope, I wish and start to utter I can, and I will. And I should think of the purpose, why I even made this goal in the first place. Perhaps that will help me to become more motivated and determined in my way to winning my triumph.

And now, I'm here to continue my journey, proceeding with a better version of myself. I am now ready to face new challenges and meet new personalities if there are chances. Willing to listen and be taught about the things that I hardly understand. I am now more open and that I must face the reality of life I have. That the world and this life is full of mazes to unravel. And I'm still starting to discovering new things and unpacking opportunities.

There's nothing wrong with feeling down, it's completely normal, we're just human beings with emotions and feelings too. These dark days have taught me about recognizing our weaknesses and acknowledging solutions are always free if you truly want to. Yet, letting these emotions eaten you up is a different story. You have the power to control your thinking, you can keep standing tall on the ground, or just do nothing. What I'm intended to say is that it always begins with yourself. No matter how sweet, kind, and strong a person's voice telling you that you should do this and that, the choice is still in you. Face your reality, face yourself, defeat that worst enemy inside you. It always begins in you.

I'm currently reaching a goal just like anybody else. A goal that I know is a worthy one and I've shared it here hundreds of times, but I won't stop sharing it with you, and convince you to join us with this mission. It's not too late to start and save your very first 1BCH! Join this amazing club #Club1BCH and find inspiring people who motivate me.

Come and join us in reaching 1 BCH this year and let this Year 2021 be a fruitful one! Don't wish for it, make it happen. 💚

Written by: @eommaZel ✍🏻🥀