Self-Portrait In Colored Pencils With Time-Lapse Video

Hi all, I drew this self-portrait for my 44th birthday in February last year. It had been a while since I drew a self-portrait and I thought why not draw one to celebrate my birthday? I am not quite sure how I ended up being in my mid 40s but life just happened and I am all good. And I am a mother too with 2 kids, 12 and 8 years old. I always had a good laugh whenever someone called me "dude" or "buddy" in the comment sections (other platforms, not ReadCash) 🤣...I am probably the same age as some of your moms 😆

Anyway, that is not the point of this post. The woman in the picture had been through some very rough stuff in life. In and out of depression most of her life, PPD, anxiety disorder, intrahepatic cholangitis that almost killed her, countless heartaches, and disappointments. I don't know how she managed to pull through. I guess little things helped. Prayers by self or prayers offered by loved ones, (definitely) through arting, fangirling on a certain Korean actor, appreciating simple things in life, having close friends, and loving family members.

Those things are my saving graces.

I hate talking about myself but I think talking about it perhaps, in the strange workings of the digital world, it could comfort someone living thousands of miles away and going through similar struggles. And of course, talking about it reminds me of the lingering sense of shame I so badly trying to battle. You see, when one is mentally struggling the way I do and talks about it, she is actively confronting the stigma associated with mental illness. That I am talking about it here, is my effort in trying to normalize a taboo so many trying to push aside.

I am not proud that I struggle. But I am proud of the effort I put in constantly fighting it. There are so many battles I had conquered and so many victories won. But I think I will save those for future posts.

Back to the drawing. This is my first portrait in colored pencils. Up to that point I always used graphite to draw and never had the confidence to try other media. But I decided to break away from my comfort zone and gave it a try. The result is not so satisfactory but hey it's not too bad, I think 😄

The large plush toy is called "hwayugi monkey/Son Oh Gong" and it's from a Korean drama (Korean Odyssey). And it's actually a birthday gift from my daughter 😅. She said, if you are sad, hug him. Bless her kind and compassionate heart 😘

Progress Photos

Time-Lapse Progress Video

The progress video. I am no pro at making a video. The quality is bad, I know, but here it is 😆

Materials I Used

I used different brands of colored pencils but Faber Castell Polychromos is the best. I highly recommend these premium pencils to anyone.

• 160gsm acid-free drawing paper

• Faber Castell Polychromos colored pencils

• Staedler colored pencils

• Master Series colored pencils

Thank you for visiting and reading my post. I hope you like it!

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