Loving You Was Wrong, But Never A Mistake

They say, love is blind. Some say you cannot choose to whom are you going to fell in love with. And sometimes, we are loving the wrong person. Or maybe we are loving the right person and the timing was a bit wrong.

I, myself, loved a person with a very complicated situation. He is my friend’s brother. He was my crush way back on my elementary years since he was so good at Mathematics. By the way, he finished his degree on Bachelor of Science in Civil Engineering this year. Going back to my story, the timing was wrong and the situation was too complicated. Why? She has a girlfriend.

We had our first conversation when I asked him about the school requirements needed on his college department. It was never my intention talking to him, but he is the only person I can ask for the school requirements. The conversation ended quickly with my “Thank you, Kuya” (kuya – big brother in English). He already told me the information I needed. We never talked again for days.

One night, he messaged me asking for an advice I could give him since I’m a girl. His relationship with his girlfriend has been quite shaky then. I told him my point of view about the matter he shared to me. I remembered calling him “kuya” with my every message and he refused it, told me I can just casually talk to him. Him asking for advice from me once became twice, thrice, and so on. It’s like, he just talks to me whenever they had a fight. Maybe I was his “pampalipas oras” (pass time in English). I am always telling him how he should say sorry first and show her girl how much he loves and adores her.

Little by little, I didn’t know my heart was starting falling for him. And my eyes don’t see him as a big brother anymore, but rather a man. He was not aware and I never thought of telling him. I didn’t want to cause him confusion. I didn’t want him to notice, so I did everything to act normal. And the idea of leaving his girl for me didn’t crossed my mind. I just loved him secretly.

He was caring. He also told me sugar-coated words. He was an amazing person. But, loving him was wrong. I shouldn’t. I never wanted to be known as a third party. I told him I already have a boyfriend and I don’t think I could still talk to him. I walked away with an aching heart. Loving him was wrong but never a mistake. I don’t regret that my heart felt it, because I know he was an amazing person.

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I want to read your story too, about falling or loving a person with a complicated situation. Fell free to comment down, I'll probably read it.

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