This evening we were informed by my godmother that my cousin's father-in-law have succumbed to cancer. I believe it was this year when his father-in-law started chemotherapy. Not really sure with the details but I have wanted to publish an article about death again.
A month ago I happened to see a noisy post from AnnaMarie24 when she talked about her dad. She started her post about not feeling good and you decided to go to the hospital for a check up and then the doctor had said that you only got a few months left. I am going to ask you the same questions that she asked, "what would you feel (when you find out that you only have few months to live)?" and "what's the first thing that you would do?". You can read about AnnaMarie24's noisy post here.
Aftet I have read that post, I thought about what I am going to do if I were to find out about that but I can only think of crying and going to the church. Just by typing this paragraph makes me a little teary eyed. I am not sure how I would feel but it would probably be mixed emotions. I will feel sad, I will be angry and I might as well be happy. Happy because I want to believe that I will be joining our Creator. In one of the Filipino movies that I have watched before where the mother found out that she had cancer, the very first thing that she did was she locked herself in the room and did not go out for a few days. She prayed and questioned God on why it happened to her. I guess all of us would be feeling differently and majority of us would question Him.
However, if everything has sinked to you, what would you do in your remaining days? Would you ask for a second opinion? Would you still try to go and have your treatments and chemotherapies? Or you would rather spend it with your loved ones and do the things that you have not yet done? For me I think I would ask for a second opinion then do the things that I have long wanted to do and eat to my heart's content. I would also want to make the most of my remaining time with my loved ones and I want it to be more meaningful and unforgettable. *I am literally crying now.* I would not want to spend a lot of money for treatments because I want to live my wealth to my loved ones. I do not want to live them with a lot of problems, debts and payables. I would rather spend my money having fun with them.
There was another Filipino film before about a woman who was diagnosed with cancer. I forgot how many months she had left but during the first few weeks that she found out about her illness, she was so depressed that her friend encouraged her. She said that she was still alive and that she can still do a lot more. Together they made a list of the things that she have not yet done. I know I have mentioned about this film in one of my articles where in she even kissed a stranger. I believe they listed a hundred tasks and places. I am not so sure if she had completed it. I think I was in high school when I have watched that movie.
I remembered my aunt who also died of cancer few years back. She was living in America with her sister. She was planning to visit the Philippines that time to spend Christmas with us but unfortunately, she found out that she was sick. She had surgery right away and had chemotherapies but after less than a year of fighting the big C, she died peacefully in her sleep. She was not able to spend a lot of time with us because they only go home once in 10 years. Our communications back then were only through emails. It was already the time of video calls but our aunts were not that techie. It would have been better if she saw us even through our phone's screens but I know that she was strong and she always had that positive outlook in life even through her cancer journey.
I am sure that we do not want to hear those kind of prognosis from our doctors. Even if we are a strong person, we would feel weak when we hear them say that we only have a few months to live. Some of us can say that we are ready to face our Creator but I know deep down that there are still a lot of things that we are thinking about. Even if we are to hear those prognosis, I hope that we can all have that will to survive. I know there were some people who even live longer than the prognosis of their doctor.
P.S. lead image was from my godfather's wake years ago.
It is a difficult question to answer, the first thing to do is to seek a second opinion, then look for a way to have a quality life for the time that remains. No one said it would be easy, depression will be lurking.