"Fate"

I am standing outside Eden's calssroom waiting for her class to end. When the professor got out from the room, I walk myself to the door. She stands from her sit and walks towards me.

"Hey." I greeted her.

"Hey." She replied. I scoop the books from her hand and hold them for her. We walked to the elevator and waited for it to open and take us to the ground floor.

We walked side by side going to the bus stop. We always walk together going home. I stopped at my pace and face her still holding her books. She also stop and face me.

"What?" She asked.

"Wanna grab some food? I'm hungry." I said with a wince. "I got hungry waiting for you." I reasoned out.

She just rolled her eyes and abruptly walked to the opposite direction of the bus stop. We walk to our favorite coffee shop. When we entered, I immediately look for a seat for both of us and drop her books in the table and walk to the cashier.

"One choco cake, one strawberry cake, 2 almond muffins and 2 espresso." I got my card and hand it to the cashier. I walk back to our table holding the tray of our orders.

We eat the cake and the delicious muffin.

"How was your day?" I ask munching my strawberry cake.

"Tiring. I haven't had a decent sleep since last week. The defense is fast approaching and that is next week Monday. My group mates is a mess, they won't help the crap out of me. Lastly, college graduation would be 2 weeks from now. I'm pressured and scared." She said whining.

I smile looking at her. She is my closest friend, if a man and a woman can be friends which is people say, impossible. And I agree with them. I have feelings for her and I'm hundred percent sure she does have to me as well. We are both indenial, waiting for the other party to say it out loud. In short we are in a childish game.

"You'll get through that, I know you. Just tell me if there is something troubling you or if there is anything I can help." I face my bag at the back of my chair and fetch the books that I bought the other day for her. It's an early graduation gift for her.

"Here, it's a gift for your hardwork." I said giving her my fall-for-me type of smile.

"Damn, Rhage!" She hold the books carefully and stare at it in amazement. It is a trilogy. She loves Jojo Moyes so much, so I bought her the whole trilogy of 'Me Before You'.

"You are welcome babe." I wink at her. She just stare at the book still astonished. We continue eating then I walk her to the bus stop.

The next day my classes starts at 11AM. After the class I walk to her classroom which is next to my class and look for her. She is in the corner busy typing with a frown in her face in her laptop and her group mates surrounds her with gloomy expressions. They must have riled her up to have that expression in her face.

I asked one of her classmates to tell Eden I'm here. Her classmate walk to her and poke her shoulders. She raise her head and look at her classmate glaring. The girl points at me.

Poor girl, now she's into Eden's shit list for poking her in that kind of situation.

Eden saw me, I wave my hand at her. Before walking towards me she leaves her groupmates some instruction.

"Hmm?" She said demanding what do I need from her and give me a look that clearly says 'it should be important or else she'll gonna cut off my head'. She is always feisty.

"Let's have lunch together." I didn't wait for her to respond and just grab her to the sky canteen of the school. We ate lunch together in silence. I stare at her. She is frowning every now and then, maybe thinking about their thesis.

I like her, I really do. I just can't say it to her. Afraid what might happen if I tell her. Afraid that our friendship might end. Afraid that I might loose her. Afraid that, maybe I'm just gonna hurt her if I pursue my feelings for her. I'm coward, alright. But I can give it a try.

"What?" She demanded when she saw me staring at her intently. Still frowning. I chuckle.

"I.." I hesitated.

"You?" There is confusion in her eyes then hope. Hope? Maybe, maybe I should give this a shot. We might end up being together and be happy.

"I..." My heart is pounding erratically inside my chest. I hope she can't hear it. I can't do this. She is still staring at me with hopeful eyes, then I stand abruptly.

"I need to go back. I'll be late in my next class." I walk fast to my next class.

Damn! I'm such a coward.

I avoid Eden for the past few days after what happened in the canteen and to just simply give her space. She must be very nervous now, it's their defense. I fetch my phone in my pocket and texted her.

To: Eden

Break a leg.

I walk to my next class.

The graduation will be tomorrow. I decided that I'll tell her about my feelings. I need to, because after the graduation there will be no more chance at all. We will be walking in different path, pursuing our dreams after college. I'm lying in my bed tossing and turning. Damn! I can't sleep. How do I confess my feelings? I grab my pillow and cover my face.

Whatever.

The day has come I should do it. I saw her walking in the entrance. She is wearing a light make up today which enhance her beauty and she curl her short hair that makes her more gorgeous than she already is. When she saw me, she gave me her gummy smile and walk towards me.

"Hey." She greeted.

"Hey." I said still gawking at her appearance today at the same time nervous about my plan of confessing.

"You look great Rhage. I like your grey suit, it suits you." She said praising me. I can see it in her eyes that she is also enduring our situation. She is also waiting for a chance to tell me her feelings.

"You look amazing, gorgeous." I said in a matter of fact voice.

Her cheeks flushed and we sit in our designated seats.

The ceremony bores me but at every passing minute my heart races triple. I'm freaking nervous. How would I tell her my feelings? I tried relaxing myself.

Chill Rhage, you aren't this pussy. We'll cross the bridge when we get there. Now I have to focus on the ceremony. The ceremony went great, we throw our caps and applauses heard. Congratulations are everywhere, picture taking with family, taking wacky pics with friends and some candid ones. I look for her in the crowd. When I spotted her with her family I walk fast towards her.

She saw me approaching her. She smiles at me.

"Congrats." She said beaming at me.

"Can we have a private talk?" She look at me confused but she nodded after. I drag her outside the auditorium and we walk inside the empty small room beside it. She just look at me intently. Waiting for me to speak.

I look at her lovingly. Damn! She's been my favorite person since I lay my eyes on her. I work hard so that I'll be her favorite person too and I knew damn well that I am. We are both enduring this, I can see it in her eyes. The hope, love, longing and pain.

"Rhage." She said silently.

"Yes?" I said in my quiet voice. My heart is beating erratically in my chest. She gulped nervously.

"I... I am..." She said stopping mid sentence. I look at her encouraging her to continue.

"I... I am wishing you a great life ahead." She flashes me her toothy nervous smile. Damn!

"I have something to tell you Eden." I said in haste.

"Hmm-mm?" She hums. There goes her eyes again. It's telling me to godamn say it out loud. That I love her and I have to keep her. I smile at her lovingly, making sure my feelings are evident in my eyes.

"Pursue your dreams, achieve your goals and have an amazing life ahead." I smile at her. She grins at me.

"I will." I draw her to me and hug her tight. I kiss her temples.

This isn't the right time yet. I'll have to endure this a little longer. Maybe, maybe in the future if we see each other again and I have the confidence to tell her my feelings I'll have her. I won't let her slip out of my arms anymore. She belongs here, here in my arms.

I squeeze her tight, she laughs. I kiss her temples again. I will miss this smell and closeness. She break the hug and look at me.

"I need to go, my family is surely looking for me by now." She said in a smile.

"Go on, I'll see you very soon." I said and let her go.

If fate is still in my side in the future time, I'll keep her forever.