"Blinded"

"Happy 1st monthsary love!" I gave her my gift.

She opens my gift for her.

"Baby, thank you but you don't have to-"

"I want to Zara." I cut her.

"Thank you Rhage. I love you." She kisses me in the lips.

"I love you more baby." I hug her tight.

--------------------

"Love? Yes, I'm at the locker room. Okay. I'll wait for you." I ended the call and wait for Zara to arrive.

"Surprise!" I shouted when she arrived. She covers her mouth in shock.

"Wow, when did you do this?" She asked still shocked.

I prepared a surprise for her, here in the gym's locker room. My friends helped me after our basketball practice and tease me about being too smitten.

"Happy 2nd monthsary love! Earlier after the practice. How's your day? Is it tiring?" I asked while walking towards her and hug her.

"It is, there are lots of things to do and to pass. It's tiring."

"I love you Zara." I rub her back.

"I love you too Rhage."

--------------------

"Love? Where are you?" I asked her on the phone.

"I'm sorry baby, I've been really busy. I'll be there after this." She hang up.

I've been waiting for her in this restaurant for almost 1 hour now. 30 minutes later she arrived.

"I'm sorry baby." She said catching her breath.

"It's fine. Here, happy 3rd monthsary love. Open it." I gave her my gift.

"Wow, thank you baby." She kisses me in the lips.

"I love you Zara." I look at her intently.

"Me too baby." She just smiles at me.

--------------------

"Baby, I can't make it. We are still preparing for our defense. I'll just see you tomorrow okay? Happy monthsary." She said hastily.

"It's fine. Happy 4th monthsary. I love you." I said.

"Okay, thank you. Bye."

I just stare at my phone for a minute then started walking to the cashier. Even though we didn't dine in, I still have to pay for the reservation that I made.

I walk out of the restaurant. I stare at the gift that I'm holding.

I sigh.

--------------------

||To: Love

Love, I'm already in the amusement park. Where are you?||

I waited for her reply.

||From: Love

Omw||

She arrived 30 minutes late.

"I'm sorry baby, I didn't thought rewriting the draft would take that long." She said in a soft voice.

"It's fine love. Let's eat first before riding the rides and here, my gift for you. Happy 5th month of love, baby." I kiss her lips.

"Thank you baby."

While we eat she keeps on texting someone.

"Who's that?" I asked.

She didn't answer me and just keep on texting. I drop my utensils on my plate, she look at me.

"Stop texting love. Eat first, tell your group mates that we are on a date. You've done too much for your group. We barely have time for each other."

"It's not my groupmates." She said frowning.

"Then who is it?" I asked confused.

"Just someone. You don't know him."

Now it's my turn to frown.

"Him?" I asked.

"Nothing let's just eat."

I walk her home.

"I enjoyed today. I love you Zara." I kiss her forehead and hug her tight.

"Me too baby." She said simply and walked in, in their house.

--------------------

||From: Love

Happy 6th monthsary love. I can't make it tonight. I'll have to finish this report tonight. Love you.||

I read her text quietly and sigh.

We barely see each other.

--------------------

I am walking to her classroom right now. I have practice later, I'll just hand her the gift.

I arrived at her classroom and saw her talking to her professor. Paul, my brother. I just stare at them, Paul saw me and smirk. We aren't in good terms with my brother. He said something to her then she faces me.

Fuck! I hate the thought of him being her professor.

"Rhage, what are you doing here?" She asked walking towards me.

"I'm here to hand this. Happy 7th monthsary love." I was about to kiss her but she dodge.

"Thank you baby." She said and just smile.

"Okay, I know you are busy I'll be going now. I love you."

"Me too baby." She left and sit again in to her seat.

I just left and take my frustration out through the basketball practice.

--------------------

Times passes like a haze. It's already our 11th month of being in a relationship.

I texted her.

||To: Love

I'm outside the school. I'll wait for you here.||

She arrived, it's already dark. I gave her the bouquet that I'm holding and the necklace. I didn't speak. I just hug her.

"Rhage-"

"Shhh.. let's just stay like this for a moment." My tear drop, I hug her tightly. I cried silently while hugging her.

"Baby, what's wrong?" She asked and breaks our hug.

"Nothing."

"What is it? Tell me." She console me.

I hold her hand and kiss the back of it. My tears won't stop.

"Please, p-please love, give me a month to accept this. I promise after that, a-after that, I'll be fine with this." I said sobbing.

"What are you talking about?"

"I love you Zara. I love you so much." I hug her again.

--------------------

"Happy 1st anniversary love. Where are you?" I asked her on the phone.

We didn't plan anything for today. She told me beforehand that she'll be busy. I'm outside of a restaurant, this is her favorite restaurant. She loves their shrimp pasta here. Even though I'm allergic to shrimp I still love this place because of her.

"I'm at home baby, doing my report." After her last word, I broke into tears.

I cry. I cry real hard. I thought 1 month would be enough to accept the fact that she is no longer mine. She is so near yet so far. She is with me but her heart isn't.

I'm standing outside her favorite restaurant, seeing her happily chatting and eating with my brother with her favorite food.

I knew there is something that she is hiding from me but I didn't bother asking what is it, I trusted her. Until our 10th monthsary arrive, she said she can't make it to our favorite movie place. I was heading out of the school that time, she said she's at home but I saw her walking towards the machine laboratory. I followed her.

She enter the room and someone is waiting inside.

They chatted for a bit then he kissed her.

My brother Paul kissed her.

"Hello? Baby? Rhage, are you still there?"

"Yes I'm still here." My voice broke in pain.

"Hey, are you okay? Is there something wrong?" She asked.

I cried harder.

"Nothing. I just saw something I shouldn't. I need to go now love. Always remember that I loved you Zara. Bye."

I was blinded.