Step Father

Blog 42
Date :March 18,2022 
Time :6:08pm

Being a father doesn't need to be related by blood but how they act as a father.

After I got married to Elmo. I didn't ask my daughter to call Elmo Papa, I just let her decide on her own base on what she felt. Eventually, she call Elmo Papa. I don't know what's her reason, maybe because she understands that Elmo is already my husband. I know that my daughter is longing for a father figure but from what I've observed Elmo is not a father figure to my daughter. After living together for more than 2 years, I notice how my daughter would interact with my husband. It seems that she doesn't feel like she has a father. Well! I can't blame my daughter. Elmo always gives me stress before, even until now but not that often anymore, as he will just leave without telling me where he goes. If my daughter will go somewhere she will only ask permission from me and Elmo notice it. He wonders why my daughter will not include him in asking permission.

My daughter is obedient, she will follow what I said. Before Elmo use to conclude without asking first and I honestly don't like it. My daughter always feels irritated if Elmo would conclude without asking. Ashee(my daughter) never talk back to me. She knows it is not good and I told her to respect not only me but to people older than her. But with Elmo sometimes she can't control her mouth. I was thinking why Ashee would react that way to Elmo? I never train her to be that way. Where did I go wrong? Then I realized it was because of what Elmo showed to Ashee. Elmo would do the household chores like cooking but he used to count what he have done. Just when he said "Oi ako pay Nagluto, then ako pud manghugas" (I'm the one who cooks and I will be the one to wash the dishes). I had to correct him, instead of saying that way, why not say it a nicer way, like okay since I am the one who cooks our food, can you do the favor to wash the dishes? Elmo usually hurt or offended me by how he says things. It's not what you say but it's how you say it. I have been telling him to think first before he talks. But still, he doesn't learn.

However, Elmo, with my unending advice and guidance, slowly learns his mistakes. He also learns to admit his mistakes. I know that he's been trying his best to be a father to Ashee. I understand how difficult for him to adjust not only to me but also to Ashee. Even if we've been living together for more than 2 years but for sure my daughter knows me better than my husband. My daughter knows when I am not okay but my husband didn't know. It seems like Elmo is not sensitive enough to know what I really feel. My daughter knows how to comfort me if I'm sad.

Ending thoughts

Elmo might not be the biological father to Ashee but I know that He treats Ashee as his own daughter. It may take time for him to adjust but at least he is trying his best to change and be a good role model to our kids.

Thank you for your precious time.

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