This past few weeks I spent most of my day to ASuL. I have to look for him and to make it sure that he won't lick his wounds until it get dry and heal. His alien helmet arrived and it's a big help for him not to lick his wounds compares to cones. The problem is, every time I go outside and finish my chores, he always go to his litter box and poo and when I get back, there's a poop on his alien helmet

So I decided to focus on him so that he can ask me anytime if he wants to eat , drink, need some scratch and I can remove him right away on litter box after be use it.

Because of that, I forgot to take care of myself physically and in health. I don't have time to do my skin care routine - it's just minimal but after I eat my breakfast, I clean my room , clean their litter box, clean his wounds and put some cream and wash his suits.

The worst is, I can't cook a healthy meal, always processed food because I'm always in a hurry. I can't do my stretching because the floor is shaking when I do my exercise here 😂.

And then one time, I got dizzy and almost fainted. I can't even hold my phone because I feel so weak. I can't even ask for a help and all I can do is open all messages but can't response. I'm not sure if I got fainted or just fell asleep but when I woke up after almost an hour, I got vomit. After I vomit 3 times, I felt better . I thought I'm just lack of sleep because ASuL keep waking me up in wee time to ask for food.

If he don't bang his alien helmet to me, he use his paws and touch my face .. sounds sweet but it affects my health 😅. Timely my sister go to my room because I got an order. She took my cats and brought to her room so that I can rest well. She get my blood pressure and heart beat (she graduated as a nursing assistant but didn't practice it). All is normal and she just prepare what I needed because Im still weak.

In the morning, she brought back my cats and wants me to prepare a food but i don't have an appetite that time. After a few hours, I felt something squeezing my heart and release it slowly. It was so painful that I almost makes me fainted, I even cry because of pain and sweat alot. It's just a few seconds but it makes me scared.

I cried to the Lord - oh no not today or any time soon. I don't want my parents bury me. Who's going to take care of my parents when they get old ( I have siblings but I know I can take care them well) . I have my cats to take care of and I'm not ready yet spiritually. I don't want to go to hell ...

My sister told me that it's impossible that it's a mild heart attack because even I'm fat and have problems in my bones, I am healthy. And my sister is right, it's not a mild heart attack, chest pain is one of the symptoms of having an acid reflux.

This is the sign that I have to take care myself more in all aspects. And to be nice and don't sleep spiritually.

I just realized that, I am more nicer now since I became friends to my whale. Because he have an attitude like a monk, he's always advice me what to do and what to avoid. But enough to go to heaven 😂..

Hayz, 😅.. see you next week because I need to rest more ❤️

Be better for real