The closure that I ever wanted.

I'm getting married and I am pregnant. That's the word that I want to tell him from the start and finally I did.

It's been a year since we broke up.

It's been a year since I choose to move on with my life without you.

It's been a year since I accepted the fact that you will never come back.

It's been a year since I give up all our plans and ..

It's been a year since I decided to be not a prison of my past which is YOU.

I remember the time that you asked for break up.

When you told me that this relationship will not gonna work.

I remember how I beg on you just to stay with me.

I remember how I cried a lot because I can't imagine that this would happened.

I asked you a lot of questions but you never gave me an answer.

I do all the ways just to reach out on you but you keep on blocking me.

I talked to your parents but they choose to be in silent and they leave me with this words.

If you are meant for each other , even if you are not together for year , destiny will allow you both to see again.

I respected the decision of your parents. I never beg on you but I didn't moved on. I don't want to move on. There's a hope in my heart that one day you will realized that you loved me and you will be back on me. I always check on you through your cousins just to make sure you're okay. I even created a new account just to see what's new in your life but I am failed because you're not a type of person who posted everything in social media. I'm still hoping that you will talk to me even if just for the closure in our relationship. You left me hanging with a lot of questions.

Why did you leave me?

Am I not enough?

There's a lot of questions that I want to hear the answer from you but I failed because I have waited almost a year but you didn't speak up.

I always texted you everytime I remember you. I texted you all the things that I want to say. I texted you how much I loved you and how much I missed you. I greeted you on your birthday even if I know that you will not reply to my messages. I all do it because I love you but all crazyness has an ending. One day came and I finally decided to move on with my life without you. It's the day I texted you that I love you and you replied me with " I love myself too ".

I changed my Facebook account because we have a lot of memories there. I created a new one and I didn't add your relatives anymore. I deleted all our pictures in my gallery and prayed to God for strength to overcome this moving on stage with my life. After a month of deciding of forgetting about you , I met a guy who is my husband now. Even if I am not fully okay , I let myself to love other guy again. I let myself to be happy again with other guy who can also love me and God is so good. He allowed me to meet a guy that I've prayed for.

All the pains in the past turns into exciting on my new relationship. A relationship who the center is God. A relationship that I want and I didn't experience when I'm with you. I love you for so many reasons but I admit that I am more happy with the man that I have right now.

We are on the half year of our relationship when I received a text message coming from you. To be honest I don't know what to feel. I don't know if I will be happy because you texted me or I will be sad because I am already committed to someone. We had a little conversation and I told you that I am now in a relationship. I also asked you and you said you're still single. During the time of our conversation I want to asked you all the questions a year ago because I still wanting an answer. You asked me if I want to see you and invited me for dinner. I didn't said yes to that question because I don't want to cheat on my boyfriend. I want answer to my question but I choose not to know all the answer because I want to be a good girlfriend.

Instead of saying the real reason why I don't want to go with you. I just said that I'm busy and I have something to do on that weekend.

Months passed you texted again. You greeted me good morning and I replied you with a why. You said you're just greeting me and you also tease me if it's wrong if you greeted me. I act neutral to my replies and didn't put any color to that. I am also in conscience because of that. My boyfriend didn't know that we have a conversation. I didn't reply on your upcoming text just to stop our conversation but you still greeted me every morning and texted me how's my life going.

February 18 when we knew that I'm pregnant and we set our wedding day on the month of July. I don't want to tell you about this and I choose to hide it until one night you called me over the phone. It was May 6 I woke up to go in the comfort room and my phone rang and it was you. I decided to tell you that I'm pregnant and I'm getting married. I cried a lot while I said this to you and you just laugh and said that it's okay. You even asked me if you are invited and I said no.

I said to you that I'm still hanging and I guess this is the closure that I am wanting and it's also the end. You told me that sometimes people will come into our lives and not will stay , sometimes they are just come to give us a lesson and I agree to him. I stop from my crying and told him that one day he will also find the girl he will marry. After that conversation I cut all the connections from him and didn't heard any news about him.