Yash

Yash. That was me. That's what they used to call me. I envy those people. They know me better than myself. At least that's what I can say.

I wake up in the morning, have my breakfast, sometimes. Coz I don't like having breakfasts. Play some games on my phone. Search for job openings. Send job applications. Would take a deep sigh, fall asleep.

Sleeping is my favorite thing. It is in my sleep that I can escape from reality. Escape from toxic people. Escape from my messed up life. Escape from my broken dreams.

I don't know myself. After not getting the dream I most wanted, I became nothing. No direction, confused, judged, discriminated, broken, ruined, wasted.

I don't know what I want. I don't know what to do. I don't know where to start. I don't know where to go.

God is just so generous to let me live upto this day. I always pray but maybe it's still not enough because I am still not getting any answers.

I know my name. But that's just what I know. And the people around me, know my name too and they give definitions to it. I just can't choose which I would believe.

I hope to know myself better soon...