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EP 16 & 17

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4 weeks ago

As I was writing this storytime article, I am currently munching on puto seko and enjoying the refreshment from my nighttime shower. Earlier this afternoon as I was laying in bed, I was thinking of what to write and I remembered when I was reviewing for my exam, there were these episodes of Grey's Anatomy that really caught my attention--- it has similarities that happened to me before.

Disclaimer: The following information about Grey's Anatomy might spoil you.

In season 2 Episode 16 & 17 of Grey's Anatomy, Meredith woke up and have this feeling that she is going to die. She doesn't even want to go to work that day but her colleagues George, Izzie, and Christina convinced her to do so. During her duty, she wasn't her best self. The morbid feeling was still lingering on her mind. And now come to this ambulance which has a patient with a missile stuck inside his chest and the hand of the young paramedics was the thing that was stopping the missile to explode. There was a lot of commotion that was happening at that time as the young paramedics were worried for her life. Because who wouldn't be worried if an arm is stuck on someone's chest which stopping the missile from exploding?

The paramedics arrived and were assessing how to safely remove the missile without making it explode. There were a lot of things to consider at that time, the ongoing brain operation that Dr. Shepherd was doing in the other operating room and the patients in the hospital. And the unexpected things happened, the paramedics removed her hand from the body and ran away, and you know what? Meredith Grey put her hand on the body putting herself in danger. To cut the story short, the missile was removed from the body and Meredith handed it safely to the bomb squad member. Unfortunately, while the bomb squad member was walking towards his other member, the missile exploded.

Here's what happened to me that has significance on the two episodes.

So, why am I even telling this? I have a similar experience as Meredith. First year first semester of college when I felt that I was dying. The occurrence of it was so sudden. I just woke feeling so empty and felt that I was going to die. I wasn't having any health problems at that time. It was just a feeling of emptiness and a cycle of going back and forth from school to home. I didn't tell anyone about what I felt. There was this time that I even thought of writing my letters for my loved ones.

Now, this was the missile part. I was walking home at that time and I always pass the police station. I can still remember it, it was a sunny morning. The moment that I was in front of the police station was the moment that I heard a loud gunshot sound. I stopped for a minute and all I ever think was to be thankful that I was still alive. I never got the chance to confirm if the trigger of the gun was unintentionally pulled or it was something that caused a loud sound.

I want to remind you that it's okay to not be okay. What's not okay is to suffer in silence. Don't hesitate to reach out to your loved ones. I know there will always be one person who is willing to lend their ears for you.

There are times in your life where you can't always act tough. Seeking help is not a weak image hence it portrays that you are a courageous person who is willing to seek help from others.

Let me finish this blog by asking you this question. What are you going to do if this is your last day?

Author's note:

This is actually the second time that I am going to share this. The last time that I talked about this was with my three friends. If you ever finish reading this, thank you! This was a piece of my life and it took me a lot of courage to open about this topic again.

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4 weeks ago
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So you also had similar experience as Meredith, I can understand your plight at that time. If we realize we are going to die we should first try to purify ourself from all the bad habits, try to behave well with others and should spend much time with our beloved ones.

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4 weeks ago

Your experience was a close call. Glad you weren't directly in the way of the gunshot. And I also have those feelings of emptiness once in a while. I guess probably it has a lot to do with my post partum as a mom.

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4 weeks ago

Oi, parang kelan lang naramdaman ko din yang emptiness na iyan, emptiness, loneliness like you have no one besides you yong bigla bigla nalang. Yong biglang dadalhin ka sa madilim na mundo tapos mapapaisip ka nalang na why I'm I even alive? Yong eqquestion mo pati existence mo. Yong pqrang kahit may alam mo ng may lalagapak na eroplano sa kinakatayuan mo di ka gagalaw kasi nga tinatamad ka na sa lahat ng bagay. My goshh, sa totoo lang nong naramdaman ko yan di naman ako depress ee. Pero bago nangyari un, nag iisip ako about my life and all na feeling ko walang usar ang buhay ko ganon.

And yeah, kapag di na talaga kayang sarilinin ang problema. Matutong mag sabi, if di na kayang esave ang sarili then seek for help.

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4 weeks ago