Why I choose to

Choosing things over the other is our choice. Whatever it may be, I believe it is a matter of decision making weather affected by few factors but still it is up unto us as what would be the final decisions that we have. In order to have good decision making we should open ourselves to listen to people whom we trust to discuss the matter and much willing to weigh things out. For decision making needs weighing and you must have a sense of balance when it comes to this. A balance of seeing the both side of the choices and seeing how would it affect you if you choose it over the other. From there on you most learn as well to be responsible of your decision making and being accountable as to how it will turn out to be.

Today, I had so much hard time physically and emotionally not deeper though but just a matter that stresses me over. As I had late sleep last time and woke up early this morning, I feel so exhausted. Yet, I need to get up early to attend my students for they will be meeting me the whole day. I don't have a choice because I did made that scheduled myself. I was even the one who move it in today schedule instead of the earlier days of the week because I have to do something else. So, I prepared myself and my classroom, which is my table and chair in the small corner of the house. I attended my class with such different mood. Yet I survive my straight 9:00 am to 4:00 pm class. Of course with my 1 hour lunch break. I handle my mode though because I am very professional towards my students and I don't want to be rude to them by any means. I manage to handle myself with very much patience. Around of applause for that self. Good job!

But that was not actually the struggle today. Not my mood, not my sleepy head and definitely not my attitude but my students. Yes, they are actually the reason of having such topic today. Because I am actually pondering right now if I am really right on choosing to accept this kind of job.

Just a few reality check and facts about it.

• First, I have different types of students and to make shift from one strategy to the other just to suit their learning style is very much difficult. The first type is so talkative without making sense and all out of topic. The time is consume most on his nonsense. The other one very opposite, the one who won't say a single word. Not unless you force them to speak.

• Second, I would constantly asked to listen and repeat myself. I don't know if I am making productive on this aspect but I don't think so. Giving them the time to process what I told them and constantly asking if they understood. Some say yes but if you let them answered on their own don't make it the right way. Others, don't say anything and worse don't even do anything.

• The time consumed on most the not learning aspects, I believe.

• The parents expect their child to become smart after a month of getting a tuitorial. Oh! I have known that the their school teacher too.

• I am not expert on teaching kids that's why I making myself learn everyday and being patience all the time. I am secondary teacher I guess that explain.

• I am so much in stress and pressure right now that the rate can't compensate all my hardwork.

But why choose to CONTINUE?

• I want to help them. In this time around I absolutely feel pity towards this kids of having so much hard time with the ways of education. I can't say no whenever a parent tapped me for help. And they are rooting for me to say yes. I don't want to rate high amount just because they needed my service. Just a few amount that I guess would not be a hard time on their end as well would do.

• I don't think giving up is the right choice. Thinking and knowing what will happen to this kids if I would let them down. Knowing that I could do something about it yet I will choose not too will make me a pathetic one. Thinking that giving up would do no good for them is quite a good choice to take than just considering what's good for myself alone. Well, I still could handle them at least with my patient that I always hope would always with me.

• I have so much hope to them. I couldn't leave them or stop my service anymore hoping that one day they would be better. Because I believe they could. I know they just needed more time and I just needed to be patient towards them. I always hope they will.

• I want to give them a chance. There will always room for improvements and I would be happy to give them at least the chance to improve themselves because they deserve it. We all did. And they are not the one learning although out but me as well, being their teacher.

• Every learning from them is an achievement for me. Yes, it is. Every learning, every improvement is a success to me. I am proud of them and of myself whenever they reached their full potential and much more. It made me feel some sense of purpose in this life.

I realize this job is not about money in the first place. This is about passion and purpose. The feeling of being tired and wanting to quite but you can't because you don't want to. Not because you benifited much about it or receive much compensation but because the people around you could benifit of your sacrifice of choosing to hassle and struggle.

I know it will not be always like this and I believe within this struggles are happiness that is deep and is rooted inside and the struggles is just in the outer layer from that of core. From that reason stated, I believe I have known today why I choose to.

In every decision that we will be making, we should ponder the things in between. Learn a thing or two about it. Access and reaccess ourselves. Ask how are you doing? and or are you still alright and willing to continue the path that you choose? Because today I know I will.

How about you? Why you choose the things you choose ?

Thank you so much for reading. I appreciate it so much.

I thank you as well to all my sponsors for always supporting me. God bless you all. And you as well my dear friend reading this. As always I love you all 🥰😘