How to make Friends?

There are different ways to meet and make friends, some friendship just happens while some you knew you guys would be close. When you bond with someone, it is left for you to decide if they would come closer or not depending on who they are.

Often you hear people say they don't know how to make friends even if they truly desire to. For others making friends is a piece of taking it flows in their system while some are slow to bond, they prefer to observe and take it gradually. I've observed that some go about it the wrong way and miss out on attracting quality personalities into their circle.

Oftentimes, people slide into my DM saying they admire me and want me to be their friend. But over time I noticed that even if I say yes, it still didn't make us close, so I figured out there must be a better way to make friends instead of asking outright. So when next you find someone you admire and want to get close to, please before you ask them to be your friend read this...

You necessarily do not have to ask them to be your friend, instead, start showing up in what interest them, become genuinely concerned about them, engage them in intelligent conversation, support them in their passion, and you can engage on their post over time they will recognise you, asking questions, helping them out etc.

Learn to relate more but don't be needy, give value, be interesting and be able to sustain a conversation. Some persons will be like

'Hello, good morning, how are you? Have you eaten?' That is all, day in and day out. It's more like a waste of time and data if you ask me.

For someone you always see physically, saying hi and good mornings always is a nice way to start a friendship, like in school, church or in your area, from hailing regularly, you can bond. But In the online space, you have to go beyond hello, in fact when you say hello, go straight to the point. Some begin to ask how are you, how is work, I think it's unnecessary if you don't know the person. You can do that when a foundation has been laid. An introduction with little or no greeting is better instead of asking hi and waiting for a response.

So the next time you meet someone you would want in your circle, walk up to them and say hello miss, sir, or hello Paul, I'm Faith Jim, I do ABC and you're, or I hear you're into ABC, that's nice you know, I have a great passion for it too, bla bla, or you have a beautiful smile, or that was a nice presentation, I must commend how were you able to...

Either compliment them or start with something that's in their area of interest or that you both share in common etc.

You can Say; 'Can I have your contact or social media handle probably we could talk more you know' instead of saying 'Let's be friends

After a beautiful introduction, learn to dish out engaging conversation, and work on continuity.

Another point to note, for those that would be making friends in the online space is having an attractive profile/timeline. Many would go and check to see your kind of person, so if your timeline reeks of unseriousness and irresponsibility they most likely won't take you seriously.

People naturally drift to where they're being supported, cared for, inspired and where they get value. So when you start giving value and being concerned about others, you will have friends. Note that if you are someone that's always complaining that people didn't check on you, I believe you can start checking on others. I've got some friends my being concerned about. Some from the comment section, etc

Also,  maintain the friendship, just like cars, friendship needs maintenance, via; love, care, communication, understanding, trust, loyalty, support, forgiveness, sacrifice etc don't choke friendship by always taking without giving, celebrate their wins and together make the world a better place. Appreciate your friends and stop doing things they said they don't like

In conclusion, the best way to have a friend is to be a friend. And please, do not force it, don't force yourself on someone, if it's not flowing and you've tried so hard to maintain it, you let it be.

But for a relationship, you can ask directly, of course, that would be after building a level of connection. You can't be asking a lady to date or marry you like some guys do on the very first chat or meeting. It shows a low level of patience and self-control. Even if the angels showed you, you should be wise enough to act smartly.