Poor parental care

I could have just said mommy issues, but I wouldn’t, because the children belongs to both parents, and it’s not an assigned duty to only the mother, but the father as well. Normally, we hear people say it’s the mother’s duty to raise the child, but the best way to raise a child is when the father and the mother come together in bringing up their future, which is the child.

I was at the salon yesterday afternoon, when my stylist suddenly talked about this particular girl at my vicinity. This girl happens to be one of the students I taught extra lessons during the Coronavirus saga early last year. I was told she was taken to hotel by guys at last nights. I was disappointed, at the same blamed the parents for their absence. A girl of 16-year-old who deserve a better future. What could she be doing at hotels with different guys?...

Her mother is a local chef, and she owns a shop at a market square, where we cook and sell food for a living. The father of the girl is no where. There was a time, I was told the girl and her little sister share different fathers. The mother will go for weeks, and decide to come home for 3 days, and leave. She will drop them foodstuffs and the necessary money she think they need and leave. This girl has being the one taking care of her sister, whenever the mother is not around. My point is, children most times needs more than food. Parental care extends far beyond providing food and protection. Spending quality time with your kids is going to do those children good than bad. It is not always about “have you eaten” or “Are you satisfied”. You need to start asking your kids “Are you okay”, “How are you coping”, “Are there any challenges you wanna talk about”. You need to ask your children intimate questions, you need to get to know your children more. Most times, it is not about food alone. There is more outside the world, the are so many things those kids digest in them and never opened up to anyone, instead they take decisions alone. You need to be present for your kids, they need your attention and love. Show them you care about them, make them know you understand what they are going through, even if you don’t, just to get them to speak. I hear a lot of news about how little girls are being molested by the close relatives parents keep them with. Yet, these kids are threatened not to voice out, and the agony live with them for life. We can raise our children differently. You don’t trust your kids with anyone. Most parents don’t even go over to pick their children at school. Once a little child sees her friend’s mom coming to pick her friend, she’s definitely going to feel bad that there’s no one coming for her. After dinner, sit your kids down and ask about how their day went. It’s not about the food every time. Peer pressure is everywhere. No child is too old or young to experience peer pressure.

Spend quality time with your kids. It doesn’t leave the father out. Give your children the chance to express themselves. Try as much as possible to know what is going on in their lives. When I talk about children here, I don’t mean the adolescents alone. You got adults as children, you got some in the university. I will use myself as an example, I got home on the 24th of December and till date, my mom hasn’t asked me how I cope at school, what my challenges are? Are there things I wanna talk about? Oh! She didn’t do that. Instead, these parents want to talk about themselves more, they want the children to know how their marriage has been since they left for school. We shouldn’t be ignorant of these things. There is nobody that isn’t going through one thing or the other in this world, but your children are your future. They deserve more care, attention than you do. It is nobody’s duty to watch your kids grow for you. No matter how old your children are, they need you. Children needs more parental care aside feeding.
I wish y’all a great day🥰.