My First 100 Words (with humor)

My son loves the song of the same name and plays it daily on You Tube Kids (ad free). A, anger, B, bribery, C, corruption, D, dastardly, E, egomaniac, F, never mind. Okay, so he doesn't have that version.

Learning

As my regular and faithful readers know, I've been regularly reading and writing since the 3rd grade. I was woman-slapped by by Guamanian teacher in elementary and was forced to write. I wrote fake news before it was cool. When I did not write well, my knuckles felt the brunt of her 18-inch wooden ruler. I learned with a quickly after a couple of raps.

University

By the time I hit college, I was 21 and fresh out of the US Army. My grammar was proficient and I made it a point to learn new words and use them properly.

I don't have any desire to bore you with words we should all know. But here are 26, and I'll throw a bone of humor in, one from each letter of the alphabet, chosen at random.

A - antithesis. Meaning: the direct opposite. Usage: The truth is the antithesis of a lie, you deadbeat.

B - brainstorming. Meaning: stimulating creative thinking. Usage: Adam and Eve began brainstorming how they could get around God's commands without getting hit by lightning.

C - contrived. Meaning: obviously planned or forced. Usage. The COVID restrictions were contrived by the wealthy to pocket more money at the expense of the poor, and yet dummies will vote fo them again.

D - didactic. Meaning: instructive; used for teaching. Usage: With the exception perhaps of "Pilgrims Progress, there are relatively few novels with a wholly didactic religious purpose.

E - erudite. Meaning: characterized by great knowledge. Usage: Sponge Bob's pal  Patrick Star is not exactly erudite; he's dumber than a rock.

F - formidable. Meaning: something that inspires fear or respect. Usage: Counting the number of angels on the head of a pin proved to me a formidable task for an atheist.

G - genteel. Meaning: marked by refinement in taste and manners. Usage: Inasmuch as this is supposed to be a genteel meeting, I will do my best to refrain from calling anyone a pencil-necked geek.

H - hubris. Meaning: arrogance; excessive pride. Usage: The principal cause of ruination and damnation is wanton excess through the sin of hubris.

I - innate. Meaning: inherent in the essential character of something. Usage: He did, however, have an innate grasp of sarcasm, dressed with flair so people would leave him alone when they asked stupid questions.

J - jargon. Meaning: the language of a particular trade. Usage: I don't understand the crypto jargon like dip, bear and hodl.

K - kickshoe. Meaning. A dancer, but a really bad one. Usage: Have you seen all the kickshoes on TikTok - are they not hilarious?

L - lampoon. Meaning: to ridicule with satire: Usage: Tiffany wrote a critical lampoon of the journalist and sent it to her local newspaper, but the editor was sleeping with her and refused to publish it. 

M - motif. Meaning: a recurring theme or subject. Usage: Roel's birthday motifs emphasized vampires, vodka and viruses.

N - nemesis. Meaning. An enemy or something that cannot be conquered. Usage: For a lot of read.cash users, writing is their chief nemesis.

O - onomatopoeia. Meaning: The formation of a word, such as cuckoo, meow, honk, or boom, by imitation of a sound made by or associated with its referent. Usage: Let's just say there's an element of onomatopoeia in the phrase cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo.

P - pseudonym. Meaning: a fictitious name typically used by an author. Usage: Satan doesn't appear to be a great pseudonym for a Christian writer.

Q - quandary. Meaning. A difficult situation that is hard to escape from. Usage: Maria found herself in quite the quandary when she had LBM at the mall and there was no toilet paper.

R - rubric. Meaning: an established mode of conduct or procedure. Usage: Reading the professor's rubric was as boring as watching paint dry.

S - soliloquy. Meaning: The act of talking while or as if alone, as in a play. Usage: Pedro's Hamlet soliloquy was two fries short of a full meal deal.

T - talisman. Meaning: A trinket thought to be a magical protection against evil. Usage: Denice used her crucifix as a talisman to ward off her ex-boyfriend.

U - ubiquitous. Meaning: being present everywhere at once. Usage: Lola's moth was ubiquitous in her province.

V - vacuous. Meaning: To be devoid of intelligence. Usage. There's a lot of vacuous content on Facebook.

W - wallow. Meaning: Devoting oneself entirely to something. Usage: The mistress was wallowing in misery when she found out she was his third mistress.

X - xenophobia. Meaning: A fear of foreigners or strangers. Usage: Hermits, not the crabs, prefer to be alone.

Y - yahoo. Meaning: A person who is not intelligent or interested in culture. Usage: Ever notice all the yahoos on Twitter barking at each other over trivial things?

Z - zephyr. Meaning: A slight wind. Usage: Was that a zephyr coming from her rear end after she ate?

There you have it, my yokels, homeslices, dawgs and besties!

W -