What To Do?
So, as you all notice, my engagement on read.cash was also reduced, and I am not as active as before anymore. Well, even before Rusty bid his farewell the other day, my interaction here was already declining for a selfish reason. But it got worse when I read about Rusty's last post. You may say that I am overreacting, but I really feel loss and sad. And I also end up thinking a lot because of it.
I am thinking about looking for a job, but I can't decide yet. I really hate socializing, and finding a job will require that. Although I already promised myself that I would start socializing more, I can't do that immediately. Finding a job will surely help me build my confidence; it's like a stepping stone for that goal, but how will I start something that I don't think I will ever be ready for?
It may be all in my head, but that's the sole reason why I can't decide and why I feel weak to get started. Because it is all in my head, my head is messing with me. Those thoughts that affect my decision It's hard to go with it if you have an overthinking mind. Should I go or not? But the real question is, will I even try it? Lol. Ah, I am not sure anymore. What happened got me thinking about various things. It's overthinking time! Lol.
It is like a wake-up call, like I should decide now what to do with my life. But I am still deciding whether to try it or not. Can I do it? How do I start anyway? Hmm, should I start dancing? Hahaha, I am really not sure what I am saying right now, lol. Should I just leave it to my luck? Maybe, whatever the future holds, I'll just go with the flow and bla bla bla. But wait, how am I going to go with the flow if I am not even starting yet? Funny ka self ah, tch. ┐( ˘_˘)┌
Anyway, I have to make a decision soon. Its not like parents is pressuring me or what, It's just that, I am starting to think about my future. If I have that ba talaga, lol. I think I don't have the future? Haha. Maybe my destiny is to become a freeloader for the rest of my life? Luhh, oh please no! I'm just kidding. Let's stop this from happenings self. AJA! If ever I still couldn't come up with any decision then, I'll just have to look for somethinf that I think will fit to me.
I shouldn't wear a 25 waistline if my size is 30, duhhhh, it will be hard for sure so I have to go with my right size. Tehee
December 23, 2022