Who should I marry?

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Written by

Raima250

Only you can set my heart on fire.

3 years ago

In community: Open For All(cc80)

Topics: Relationship, Marriage, Perfect life partner

This question have always pop out whenever am having discussion with singles, unmarried and even some married folks.

I wonder why many people seem to be so confused about the kind of person they wanna spend their entire life with.

In August 1995 I had my chance to making a choice in my love life, then I was doing my NYSC program and I was so naive, inexperienced and innocent at that time, but can never deny the fact that I had some knowledge about what love really is.

A lady came along, though we watched each other from far and only exchanged greetings, but we got closer as friends in May 1996 and we became so close.

We share a lot of things which many could call compatibility and we had same ideals and plans for the future, but little did I know that this lady had a list of about 10 facts concerning the man of her dreams.

I made 8 out of the 10. He wanted a guy that is light complexion and a doctor, however, today her husband is neither a doctor nor light in complexion.

Many like her keep notes of physical attributes of their future partner not minding the core things which will last longer and these are the things not visible to the eyes.

Many are equally being dillusioned by what motivational speakers and those in match making businesses are teaching today and have forgotten about what is most needful about love and the most important thing about marriage.

Do I need to repeat that fact here again that marriage is more of a spiritual entity than the physical and for a proper foundation for a peaceful home, you have to consult and start with God.

If you truly wanna live a life of peace in your marriage despite all challenges that may arise I will want to suggest you marry:

1. SOMEONE THAT FEARS GOD.

You need to reverence and fear God in all your doing if you want His best. Living a worldly lifestyle and expecting to marry a decent person as a spouse could be difficult. You will attract your type to yourself.

2. SOMEONE WHO WILL REVERENCE THE GOD IN YOU.

That special some one will never make you sin against God. That special someone will encourage you to serving God in all ways. That special someone will open your eyes to the deeper knowledge about God. That special someone with be a bonus spiritually in your life.

3. SOMEONE WHO WILL LOVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

If someone you are planning to marry is already complaining about how poor your family are and how uneducated your parents are, definitely and by my own opinion I don't see a true love in that situation.

When you are being made to do things that will only boost their own ego and never minding your own emotions, then selfishness and self-centeredness is at work, please flee if you still have the chance.

4. SOMEONE WHO IS READY TO GROW WITH YOU.

We all have our shortfalls and we are work in progress striving towards perfection in life. Your future partner likewise needs some brushing up and some cleansing, do that for him/her if you truly love them.

Walk and work with them in all their endeavours and give them a helping hand until they reach stardom. If you have a lady or a guy in your life that is willing to do this for you genuinely, I believe he or she loves you.

5. SOMEONE WHO IS ACCOUNTABLE TO YOU.

After we met our pastor and he commissioned us into courtship, I declared my sources of income and worse part of my past to my wife to be, and she did likewise.

Though, we had some issues in the past on both sides so difficult to accept, but because we understood God have reasons for bringing us together we moved on and six months courtship was capped in marriage.

During those periods, it was a long distance relationship, but we never failed to update each other on our daily activities and we made long hours of night calls in the process. The point is, that special someone must carry you along in their lives every time and everyday.

6. SOMEONE WHO WILL GIVE YOU A SENSE OF BELONGING.

When you guys step out together on a walk, he/she must never be ashamed of being identified with you. They must be very happy to introduce you to their families, friends, colleagues in the office and those who care to wanna know who you are.

He or she must not insult or rubbish your integrity in the public or before their parents. He or she must be ready to defend you in whatever situations. He or she must value your ideas, views and opinions. And before they take any decision concerning their own life, they will consult with you on your opinion.

7. SOMEONE WITH A DREAM AND A VISION.

If you are presently in love with someone who will say, when we get to the bridge we will cross over, please be careful. I am a man of faith and I believe faith demands some actions also.

The picture of the future must be well defined and that will be the blueprint for the friendship and the marriage in the end. You need a visionary as your spouse nothing more or less.

There is a lot to write about concerning who to marry or who not to marry, but the bottom line is no matter angelic she is or how handsome he is, the most important thing is, is he or she God fearing and genuine?

Never get carried away with beauty, shapes, sexy curves and heights, if that brother or sister is never getting you closer to God YOU NEED TO RUN RIGHT NOW.