However, the stars turn out, the planets line up appropriately, all the friends give the green light, even the parents do not breathe in despair of disappointment - your new romantic relationship shows all the signs of complete success.
But before you head out on Facebook and joyfully announce that a Hollywood romantic fantasy is happening in your life and that you’ve found the love of your life forever, it’s wise to look a little deeper. Just enough to check if what is fogging your brain is really true love or just a sweet but short-lived lust.
Love and lust somehow overlap, both are never enough and both are essential for a relationship to flourish. But the differences between the two are obvious, and sometimes it happens that only passionate desire keeps you in a relationship, which arouses strong emotions and gives the impression that it is actually love.
Luckily, you can check out what’s really behind your new relationship, just so you don’t have to wait too long before things crystallize, and so you don’t write any erroneous findings on Facebook.
The procedure is extremely simple and painless. Well, at least physically painless.But beware, these are not questions that will merely determine whether you are driven by passion or true love, but they also contain quite a few hints for understanding the foundations of a healthy relationship.
1. Is your relationship built on a deep friendship?
In the age of Tinder and the consequent fact that people get entangled in relationships that they have slipped through through a smartphone app, it’s hard to talk about friendship as the foundation of a new relationship. And yet, after a while, this question may seem perfectly legitimate. When the two of you have been together for some time, having already discovered what they have in common and what they don't, you can calmly ask yourself - is she also my friend? Do I trust him as my best friend?
If you can answer this question in the affirmative, you are well on your way to a loving and long-lasting relationship. Relationships built on friendship have tremendous added value, as the partner is not just a sexual-emotional valve, but someone we can rely on anytime, anywhere. He is a person who knows, understands and respects us. And at the same time someone who will always be available for a cup of coffee and a conversation, even when no one else has time.
2. Do you often feel jealous in a relationship?
A relationship is a coordination between partners based on trust. Whatever the situation. This is when he can look at a girl who walks past them in a skirt so short that it is legally forbidden in more than eleven countries around the world, and she comments on his stare: “But steaks certainly don’t bake as good as me. "
Because he knows that in his view there is nothing but a male inability to resist visual stimuli. She is not jealous of the fact that she also has a friend, that she sometimes prolongs her time with friends over beer and that Kate Beckinsale finds him incredibly sexy.
On the other hand, there are couples who are united only by lust, who live together only for sexual moments. These couples are bound only by an intense emotional connection. Passion, physical devotion.
In such couples, the partners feel jealousy much faster and much more often, even when there is no reason for it, as their relationship, based only on physical attraction, becomes a projection of all relationships. You say, every look, every concern, can be a threat to what you have, because they only have the result of attraction. Jealousy, however, is not a feeling that partners who live in a trusting, healthy relationship resort to with every running eye.
3. Or from a partner or. partners expect perfection?
To this question, in the first breath, everyone says, "No!" Because it sounds so absurd. So pointless. Perfection, however, is unattainable. Nobody is perfect. And think again. This question does not ask whether you want your partner to be a cross between Brad Pitt (early years) and Captain America, or whether your partner becomes a fusion of that young German teacher from high school, Jessica Alba and some sloppy porn star. This question asks how many things really bother you about your partner?
Namely, love means that we accept every mistake and every imperfection in the person we are with. What do you appreciate and expect?
If you are driven by lust, then you want the person you choose to always look like the best version of yourself. With the perfect hairstyle. With the perfect look. With perfect gestures. And that this perfection is always manifested when they are together in society, among friends, among acquaintances. To show how fantastic a trophy you have with you. Not a person. Trophy.
4. Do you keep a lot of secrets to yourself?
It may sound clichéd and sugary, but it's true - love-based couples have no limits. They have no walls. And they have no secrets. Not because it’s right, but simply because it’s not necessary. If it is true that they are not only partners but also friends, if it is true that they respect each other as they are, then hiding is unnecessary.
However, they are even more necessary if the couple holds together only desire. In such a relationship, the partners do not want to show their true selves. They do not reveal themselves in all their shades, because lust feeds only the best, the most beautiful, the best. What lurks behind our public facades, what we are when we don’t have to pretend anything at all, is most often not an image that evokes unstoppable passion.
5. Is sex the best thing you have in a relationship?
Well, there we are. On the most important question. The chemistry in the bedroom is, of course, very important, even necessary. But obsession and complete fixation only on the sexual part of the relationship is not the foundation on which a lasting romantic relationship could be built.
Because if only sex holds you together, one or the other will sooner or later become bored in the relationship. Even with great sex, we eventually start to wonder if maybe maybe even a little better sex is around the next corner (not literally, I hope).
So the right relationship needs to have something more. That good sex can be followed by a good conversation, happy company, common interests, common beliefs, the same desires. Then sex can be the cream on top of this romantic dessert. And until that happens, that right person without a bad conscience can only be the right person for now.
Photos are taken from google.com.
I hope you like reading my article,if it so then......
Oh wow, that was some eye-opener thoughts but sad to say, I have never been in a relationship so I cannot apply lols