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Have you ever had pimples? Or you’re the kind who has clear glass skin? Some people define beauty as those who have a clear white skin. They describe what they see physically. Being beautiful is being clear. Being beautiful is being sexy. Being beautiful is being tall. How can I deal with it when I don’t ever have one?
I used to get bullied just because of how I look and how they see me. I don’t have the clear glass skin that most women have. Pimples that’s only what I have, these things never leave me even though I was using almost everything just to get rid of them. I shouldn’t be like this, it consumes my self-esteem already. How can I be confident when I know I can’t. We are now in the 21st century where beauty has been the center of attraction. Where things required height and beauty. Dealing with these is such a burden for me. People who saw me feel disgusting, no need for them to tell me because their actions are more than enough. What makes me feel hurt is when some of my relatives feel the same way too. I’m not beautiful so what? Sometimes they also make fun of how short I am. They think I’m in high school where in fact I am a 4rth year college student. I won’t blame life nor anyone because this is me and I am what I am. But I would say this is my biggest insecurity.
This might be difficult for me to deal with but I have to. I can’t let them make fun of me again. If people can’t see the good side that I have, then I won’t force myself to be in that circle. Beauty for me defines how good someone’s heart is. It isn't required to be tall or short, thick or thin, or either glass skin or not. Life actually doesn’t require it but some people do. Even though I force myself to meet those standards that society has, still I can’t. I might can’t embrace their beauty but I have my unique definition of beauty and that’s what really matters. If getting rid of these pimples won’t bring any success then the only thing I can do is surely accept. That things happen for a purpose, that it is something I need to embrace. I am used to it so what’s more I can ask for. No fake, I still feel hurt when they make fun of me though I tried to stop them but I can’t control things. Crying up all night is not even enough and would never be. I am not that strong but I am trying my best to be.
In every article I wrote, I also learned a lesson. We can’t push things to happen so that it will fit what we want. Some things need to be accepted even though the world is already telling me that “I don’t belong to them”. Probably, I don’t have clear glass skin, not tall nor sexy but I have myself. This is what I am and I don’t need to force myself to be like that because if I will then I am not ME anymore. I would rather stay like this than live in someone’s expectations. Now I learned to go with the flow when my world is shaking, so that world can’t shake me.
I grew up having low self- esteem but I was trying to fix this until the world can describe beauty as having the confidence and embracing the real me. I’m almost there and the soonest beauty defines the heart.
Images are from Pexels
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Just be who you really are no matter what people say and keep becoming better too. No matter how we look or what we do, people will always say something that may hurt us so just let them be the beautiful you :)