I believe there are two kinds of people in the world we live in. One who is chained to their past, like a prisoner in jail and can't get out of it. The other who, though their past was painful, has now moved on. We cannot change the past, no matter how much we want to, once it has happened, we can write it in the history book of our lives and either flip through it from time to time to stir our souls or close it forever and move on.
Which kind of person are you? I hope you can close your past even if it is hard. I know it is hard sometimes and takes time. Whether it is a bad decision, that made you suffer from some sort of losses, a heartbreak or any kind of bad memory. A lot of people still live in the past or find it hard to accept the fact, that what's done is done.
How many times you heard the following or even you said them before: "what would have been if..." or "I should have done it differently..." anyway these are the things, that we just have to close. People who spend too much time thinking about what happened in the past, about what they did in the past, have to learn to get rid of the past thoughts, that hold them captive.
The weight of the past means different things to different people. While someone may find it very difficult to cope with their past and spend an eternity regretting it, you may be able to get through it very quickly. It may also be, that what you thought would be difficult, you will soon get over.
The Opportunities Of The Present
There is a lot of potential in the present. If we recognise them and take advantage of them, we can hope for a better, brighter future. There is a song that goes like this:
"A new day always promises new hope, tearing apart the darkness of the night."
The darkness of the night does not necessarily mean the last night, it can also be an event from sometime in the past. The present is the perfect time to start doing new things, meet new people and have new experiences. All of these help us to bring closure to what happened to us in the past. I don't say forget, because we will never forget, but we don't have to live with it. Momentary pleasure causes momentary forgetting, but when that pleasure passes, the past lives on in our memories just the same.
Time heals all wounds, grips all broken hearts and, although it does not erase them from our memories, we can start a new life or pick up where we left off. It is not always necessary to start all over again. Whatever happens, life does not stop and we must continue to live, but in the present and not in the past.
Living The Present Without Losing The Past
When we refer to closing the past, leaving it behind, we are not saying forget it. Before the thing happened, that caused us pain and we don't like to remember, to that, before that everything was fine and dandy, our lives were happy and joyful. We should remember that and it is worth remembering, if we think that it was not a waste of time, then let us remember, because it gives us good feelings.
Every memory is a part of you, you lived it and it means a lot to you, not to anyone else. You are happy to pass it on to your friends and loved ones, because you think it's worth talking about. On the other hand never let your past take place in your present and take away all the opportunities, that could open up in front of you.
"I am concerned about the possibility of dealing with the past. The question is what it takes to incorporate our losses, our traumas, and live with them as if they no longer affect us, no longer hurt us, no longer suffocate us, but we have come to know them, we know their consequences, their effects." - Andrea Tompa
Tips To Put Your Past Behind You
Change Your Environment
When I was under myself and nobody and nothing interested me, not even myself. I got a piece of advice. It was from the very person, who had done me the harm. They advised me to leave everything and go away for a while. I should completely turn off my thoughts and feel free. I didn't want to hear about it, of course, because I didn't think I could do it.
I finally thought it over and went away. You know what? I left behind an unforgettable 10 days with a lot of good memories, and I didn't think about my pain for a minute while I was away. Long-lost friends and a change of scenery took their toll and I returned as a completely different person.
Don't Be Attached To Objects, That Make You Remember
Sometimes an object, a photo or anything else even a song could bring up memories, that you don't want to remember. Put them away or even better get rid of them. If they are too personal and you believe, that they really belong to you, just put them away somewhere out of scene. You will see it will help.
Move Away Permanently
In case we are talking about past relationship, if you can, move away so you cannot see ad go to places, where you went wih your ex and had a wonderful time together. Believe me it could really hurt even after some time.
Closing Thoughts
You are your past. Discover the beauty and value in it and move on.
If you can see even a grain of value in your past, that you can use it for your own benefit, it will be easier to move on.
I have a few things that I regretted the most in the past but as they say, the past is past. But for me, just because it's in the past, doesn't mean you have to forget about it entirely. In my case, I used all my regrets in the past as a motivation to do better to avoid the same mistake again. Also, you need to accept the fact that you're just a human being who makes mistakes in life. Acceptance is the key.