God Save the Queen

[WP] Everyone is immortal. Death by age is a myth. You are part of a secret order of assassins from the future whose job is to kill people once they get too old, The Queen of England is 200 and nobody in your order has never even been able to get near her, Until now.

******

Yesterday was a fiasco.

"You all had one job. Just the one. Kill the old bat. That's all. And you BLEW IT!" Our commander screamed, looking at all 12 of us sitting at the table.

We were supposed to be the Special Unit which handled the deaths of high-profile members of the society. Yeah, you heard me. Death. Sadly, whoever programmed our bodies didn't have a mechanism for the end of life, so bodily function didn't really deteriorate as people got older.

People are immortal.

But then there's us, The Order of Grim, which maintained the population balance in the world. From the 23rd century, we jumped back in time to

We could hit a person when he was 32, and watch him deteriorate till he died at 68. It was random, we received consignments from the AI, Asphyxia.

And we were freakin' good at our job. Never gotten caught, never missed it. Occasionally, we did allow some people to clock over 120, for good sport.

But they still had to die.

Until THAT HAG, Elizabeth II showed up.

"It's the year 2226. The Queen is still alive, and she's a whole freakin' 300. THREE HUNDRED! What were you guys thinking?"

"It's a lot harder than you'd think," Sarx said. He was quite sassy and sarcastic, and he didn't care that the commander was his superior.

"Well, Sex..."

"It's Sarx."

"SEX," Our commander fumed angrily. Even Sarx knew when to shut up. "You guys got Reagen and Bush. What the hell is so hard in nailing the Queen?"

"Well, she's always heavily guarded, and the M16 aren't as lax as the CIA. All our time-travels have almost ended in a bust," I offered.

"As tricky as that situation is, for her to reach 300, it must have aroused suspicions in the aging process. Before long, if we aren't careful, people might start talking, and investigations might be carried out. We have 10,000 agents outside this Special Unit, and anyone could be caught. Take care of this!" he said, walking out.

In the end, it was decided that I would be the one to do it.

I'd never tried, but I guess I'd have to do something about it.

******

MANCHESTER, LONDON. 2126

As I apparated in 2126 London, I was admittedly surprised by the present technological adb]vancements, even though things had gone much farther in my time. Flying cars were everywhere, as well as real hoverboards - that actually hovered. For the not-too-rich folk anyways.

Why did I choose 2126? Simple: tech advancements had developed enough for me to use some of my high-tech equipment without an instant burnout. Yeah., the Queen was 200 then, or now, I haven't really grasped time-speak, but that was okay.

Teleportation was possible - though only accessible to the rich then. Hmph. In my time, it was too mainstream. I could basically think of a place and be there, rather than have that bulky watch they used now.

All the same, tech had gone far.

I used my photo scanner to replicate the clothes worn at ta=hat time and put them on before leaving the telephone booth. The booths were part of Britain's history, so they were never removed. If only they knew it was out ticket into and out of Britain.

How to kill an unkillable old hag.

Well, that was a bestseller I'd have loved to read. We had even tried assassination, but the woman was rarely ever seen in public. The Royal Wedding was another chance, but too many variables.

Sh!t.

I had been given a task none else could accomplish, and I had a deadline. All I knew was that a direct approach would yield nothing.

I had to monitor her movements. Know her perks, her quirks, her habits, her faults, every detail about her life.

I needed to go to a freakin' library.

I spent a shitty week trying to get used to their outdated tech, lousy food, and annoying accent. One thing I did not appreciate was being called a 'bloke', but I had to remain undetected.

When I was done with my research, I knew exactly how to kill her. It was going to take a lot of planning, but I was ready to do it.

******

SANDRINGHAM HOUSE

First impressions: that was a really stupid name for a place.

Anyway, it was the Winter and Christmas residence of the Queen, this knowledge being one of the products of my research. I didn't appreciate the fact that it was freakin' cold, but I had no choice. Now was the only time I could do this successfully.

According to weather forecasts, this was going to be the coldest night yet. Just perfect.

I waited, and when I was ready, I phased into her room. But there she was, at the table, Gin, Dubonnet, Lemon and Ice on the table in separate canisters and bottles. She held in her hand a laser gun, which was not capable of piercing the body armor I was wearing but could hit my unprotected skull.

And I wasn't going to take any chances with her shooting skills.

"So you people finally decided to make another bold move? What's it been, a decade?" she asked.

I looked at her, stunned as I was determining my next course of action.

"You knew about us?"

"When I hit 110 and I hadn't died yet, I was intrigued. Of course, there weren't many conspiracies about you guys, since no one had ever seen you before, so I thought that I'd eventually die one day."

"So it was in 2040 that I finally got a visit from you guys, and unfortunately for that agent, I saw him when he apparated in my room. I was in the control room then, spying on everyone in the house. At that moment, I knew something was up and I tripled my security."

"So now, you just want to kill me?" I asked, nodding towards the gun.

"Yes, because I don't want to die. Ever. There's much more to this life than getting old and dying. Care for a drink?" she asked as she began to mix her signature Gin mixed with Dubonnet and Lemon on the rocks.

"I don'

t take alcohol."

"The more reason why you should die," she smiled as she sipped her drinking. relishing it before, ever so ungraciously, downing the contents.

"I'm going to send a message to your leader that.. that.. uh..."

I watched her grip her chest as I took the gun from her hands and calmly tossed it away.

"That's why I don't drink alcohol. It can become an Achilles' heel." I said, taking a seat. "Before I came to 2126, I went to 2125 and visited the place where your next shipment of Gin was to be sent from. I swapped one bottle with another which was 75% Potassium Chloride,"

She gasped as she held her chest painfully, sinking to the ground.

"Of course, it'll stop your heart because it causes an irregular hearttbeat. It's used in Lethal Injections, right?"

"How did you know I'd be drinking it now?"

"I didn't. I only knew that shipment would last till about December 2126. I didn't know if you'd pick the bottle rightaway, or last. But it was Russian Roulette that paid off with this grand finish."

"You're on camera. You won't get away woth this. Everyone wil know about you!"

"I highly doubt that. You didn't want to have a security camera installed in any of your private chamers. You loved to snoop on others but couldn't bear the thought of beiong snooped on yourself., Whuch is why that panic butoon was placed by the bedstand. It would have been useful now, if you just stayed on your bed like a good girl."

"Why you..." she said, as she took her last breath.

"See ya later, alligator!" I said, recalibrating my time machine and vanishing.

******

@Hanzell@Leo_kitti whew!