Profile Set Up.

This is the question asked on the "Weekend Experiences" community on Hive and I did justice to it the best way that I can, based on the little experiences I've had with it.

Topic: You’re designing your own dating app profile. What do you write, how do you present yourself and what photos do you load on the site? Are you honest or do you fabricate the truth? What types of people do you target and what do you think your first date might be like...and the morning after?

I wasn't much of a dating app kind of person way before now but I've tried my hands on 2 or 3 apps before now. There is that interesting part of meeting someone randomly and for what's worth it is sometimes exciting but on the downside, they might not be all they claimed to be but the fun part of talking to someone new without having to "see" the person while at it for a brief moment gives that great feeling which you can't describe.

In the few dating apps I have used before now, I always keep it simple. I give people a peek into who I am and what I expected. It's a dating app but sometimes I narrow it down to friendship first just so I wouldn't sound desperate hahahaha. I used to be a shy person and most people wouldn't believe that part of me when I tell them because I am always fun, bubbly and sometimes funny. The shy part of me always made me stay away from people sometimes and on some of the dating sites I used then, it took me a long while to physically see those people. You know when you know you have something going so well online and the offline moment comes and you just hope to the heavens you wouldn't let the shy part of you just ruin it before they would think you are pretending.

What do I write on my profile? It's simple... "My name is Olawale also known as 'Olawalium'. Fun, a bit shy and single. I am a writer, a poet and I work as...(I always mention my job at that time). It would be nice to get to meet 'you'".

I've never been the type to write something lengthy in my bio because the moment I hit you up with a chat and we start chatting, you will forget everything I've written in the bio. I'm always engaging so much that you would have to leave your other pending requests just to engage with me. I like keeping it simple and not giving anyone too many expectations with my bio which helps me to narrow it down to a few people and that's fine by me.

I am always honest with my information. I've never lied about my information. I always keep it real and I always use my pictures too. There was a time I even tried my hand on Tinder when I was hearing so much hype about it. I was in a relationship and I just felt like having that rush to meet someone new. I uploaded my picture, stated my relationship status and made it known that I just wanted a female 'bestie' like a female friend that we can be cool talking on the phone. It's silly because I felt who would want to just be talking to someone over the phone with little chance of seeing them but as I said, it helps me narrow it down because I believe there is at least one person that would feel the same way I feel.

It's funny because it didn't take me two days before I got matched with someone and we started talking. If I tell you I'm friends with that person to date you will be shocked. I've seen her over and over again and even now being married, she sends gifts to my daughter and she is well known by her as well. So, I always take the honest route when it comes to setting up a profile on dating apps. The funny thing with meeting that lady is that, after I asked her in our chat if she is cool with the "bestie" thing of just engaging each other as friends without any involvement and she said she was cool, I deleted the app that same day after she shared her contact with me which made her understand that I wasn't there to mess around but to just have someone to call a friend from a distance.

So, back then when I was active with a few of the dating sites, I would have preferred anyone nice. The funny thing is I don't have any physical specifications in mind. I always go with who the person is. I've met so many attractive people with terrible characters and I've learnt never to judge a book by its cover next time but of course, I always prefer ladies, single, presentable with a decent fashion sense. I like a natural face too.

I always upload my recent picture which I know makes me look a bit handsome 😂🤣😂. Come on, who doesn't like to put their best foot forward? I'm not different either, so I uploaded lovely pictures of myself where I was smiling. I heard my smile is a charm too 😂😂🤣🙈🙈🙈🙈 oh well... Forgive me there.

Dates aren't the same in Nigeria as they are in foreign countries 🤣🤣😂🤣🤣😂. We don't always set up dates as fanciful as most people do in the western world. I call it mostly "meet up"... You know when your curiosity gets the better of you and you just want to meet the person you've been chatting, texting and calling all this while. There was a time I wanted to meet one of these lovely ladies back then and I told her we should meet at a lovely eatery that isn't far from her place. I mostly pick locations that are midway or close to the lady's place so they can feel safe (that's excluding some that can be shy like me that would prefer to come to my house instead... Oh well... Who was I to say no?)

So, back to the lady I was explaining, I set up to meet her at a popular eatery but she told me she didn't know when she might finish her hair and nails. Of course, if you have Nigerian parents you are sure that the 7 pm date night thing can never be up for discussion or else they would tell the whole world how you are becoming a "bad" child. Most of the time you pray for them not to be around so you can get around your business. It was easier for me to have those who wanted to visit me come around because I started the dating thing more when I lost both my parents apart from the time that I lied to mummy that she was a school mate and I would sneak into the extra room she kept the lady.

Why am I drifting so much? I guess I have too many stories to share. Forgive me. So, this lady asked me to visit her at the salon instead and that would be our first meeting. I decided to go but not empty-handed. She was already making her hair when I got there. She saw me and we both started smiling sheepishly. I spent like an hour there, paid for her hair and nails, got her a small gift and I left. On the next visit, she came over and the rest was history as she became a regular visitor to my place.

There were times my grandma would be the one to open the gate for her when she would knock downstairs around 10 pm 😳😳😳😳. I didn't even know she was coming and we chat a lot. Her way of surprise...she comes at that time because it was the time her parents took a late night flight and she would have left the next morning before they come back in the afternoon. You have to fear Nigerian parents.

Okay, this is too long already and let me draw the curtains right here 🙈🙈🙈.

Thank you for your time.

My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks. I am love's chemical content in human form and that's why  I advise people to take a dose of "Olawalium" daily. 🙈

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