Nang Inday: A Mother Whose Love Language is Service

Two days ago, we received shocking news from a family friend, her mother who's a very good friend of my mom just died of a heart attack. She was our neighbor before we transferred to our permanent house, she was also our churchmate.

Nang Inday

Thinking of her death, my mother recalled how "Nang Inday" was very stressed with her family. Her love for them brought about so much pain in her heart. Her love language was service.

From her husband, down to her children. She never gets a day off, she works hard outside washing someone else's clothes and when she gets home, she serves the family. Oftentimes, when we were still neighbors, she stops by our house before going home because she wanted to rest. She then talks to my mother about her day, how her employer ridiculed our church, how her husband had quarreled with her kids before she left for work, and how she worked hard so she could send her eldest to school.

When I was younger, I used to go to their house, play with her daughter and I have seen how her kids treat her, she was like a housemaid, she gets scolded if they won't get what they ask from her. I could also remember how she'd run to our house, breath catching and with eyes filled with tears asking for help because her husband and kids were fighting, almost killing each other with a bolo in their hands. I couldn't forget how frightful that night was when she showed up. That incident happened often until we transferred to another house.

But we still see each other at church. Our last conversation was the weekend after her birthday, we met after church and I handed her a cash gift. She was grateful for it and I told her she should be better now because she has her grandchildren with her, she smiled at me and talked about my graduation day in college, she was with us at that time and she was so proud of me, she was a true friend to us.

Back then, she always brings us jackfruit, she had a lot of fruit trees and she was a generous one.

Cause of Her Death

According to her son, Marlon, that's her eldest, the one whom she sent to college and is now a seaman or a member of a marine watercraft's crew. He just came from the ship, he went home that morning and brought them chocolates but he had no cash in hand yet as he still has to withdraw from the bank. His father asked for cash for their medicines but he declined because he explained he doesn't have any cash yet. He promised he'd come back and give them the money needed.

However, the younger sister (Aileen) was complaining and was already talking foul words at Marlon and his wife, she said his wife is being so stingy to them. Nang Inday was holding her chest already, telling them not to fight, to stop quarreling but she didn't listen.

Then by the afternoon, Nang Inday asked that Aileen may call Marlon because she was already not feeling well, unfortunately, they can't reach Marlon's number so she called the wife and then, Aileen had another call fight with the wife, telling her all sorts of bad things, Nang Inday was triggered once again and suddenly had a bad heart attack. She died right there.

Aileen on the other hand made it look like Marlon was the reason for Nang Inday's death. She told us about it over messenger but when we talked to Marlon, and the rest of the family, the true side of the story was revealed, and that it was indeed Aileen and her bad mouth that caused Nang Inday's heart attack.

Looking Back

It was not only that time that Aileen had been giving Nang Inday heartbreaks and headaches, back then, but she had also told her that it would be better for her to die. It breaks my heart because I knew Nang Inday was doing her best to give her kids the best things even if she has to wash several clothes, work as a house helper, and cook viands so she could sell to their neighbors just so she can give to her children what they needed.

And then Aileen also had a relationship with someone who's already married, yes she was once a mistress. She even had the audacity to bring the guy to their house and demanded Nang Inday to serve them food!

The Wake

Now, in the wake, it was no surprise that Aileen has been absent. She was there with her mother when she died but right after Nang Inday was taken for embalming, she fled and even brought her daughter. That daughter whom Aileen left at their house and let Nang Inday take care of. She was nowhere to be found at the first wake.

Lesson

Before I point fingers at how bad Aileen had been treating her mother, I reflected on her actions and thought to myself if I had in any way was mean to my mother at some point. I know I had hurt my mother too, perhaps not in the same way as to how Aileen hurt Nang Inday.

Disclaimer: Lead image credits to unsplash

xoxo,

mommy jean of momentswithmatti

Love harder than any pain you've ever felt.